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Sometimes I wonder what keeps me at this job and if nothing else, by the time it's all over, I'll have some great stories to tell. Stories like these:
As the mind roams away…
SC: I have charges on my bill for roaming minutes but I have roaming included in my plan.
M: Ah yes, I see the charges. They are actually for overage minutes, not roaming.
SC: But it says roaming 20 cents a minute.
M: Well, yes but what you are looking at is the breakdown of overage minutes, some of which were roaming and some of which were not.
SC: I have roaming IN my plan, it says right up above on the bill “roaming included”
M: Yes, but if you go over your plan minutes, you have to pay for that, regardless of if they are roaming or not.
SC: Then why does the bill say “roaming included”?
M: Because not all plans include roaming, yours does.
SC: Then why I am billed for it?!
M: (wanting to bang my head on the desk) Let’s go over this again, those charges are for OVERAGE minutes that were incurred while you were roaming. A roaming plan means there are no extra charges for roaming, not that you have unlimited roaming minutes.
SC: I have roaming in my plan!
M: Those are OVERAGE minutes ma’am, and are not included in your plan.
SC: May I speak to a supervisor please, I just don’t understand this. (and yet you seem so fast on the uptake...)
M: Very well (flag down sup)
Sup takes over the call and repeats what I explaine to the woman about FIVE times before she finally, sort of gets it, and stops whining. After the call my sup and I had this exchange:
Sup: That woman was dumber than a bag of rocks!
M: Oh come on now, that’s insulting to the bag of rocks.
Freaking kids!
Evidently one of the managers thought it would be fun to bring her kids to work. I suppose I could tolerate them writing all over our whiteboards, so long as they were quiet, but somehow the little brats got into a room that controls EVERY LIGHT in the center. First they go off, then on, off, on, off, on, then they start blinking wildly, causing the two sups present to dash to the back and take care of the problem. After that, the kids were nowhere to be found for the rest of the day.
Waaaaah! Phone! Waaaah!
SC: I drove all the way here to do an exchange because my phone is broken but the guy inside is being rude to me. He says he can’t do anything because he’s only a dealer and not a company store. One of your reps told me this was a company store.
M: I do apologize for the confusion but dealers are limited in what they can do compared to corporate stores.
SC: Look, I NEED a phone today. I have insurance on my phone, why can’t I go in there and pay him $50 for a replacement phone?
M: Unfortunately it is a dealer store, they won’t be able to do that for you.
SC: (whiny voice) Why not, I need a phone today. I came all the way out here, you should cut me a break.
M: As I said dealers are limited in what they can do…
SC: Ok how about this, to get a replacement through the mail, I pay you $50, you send me a new phone and I send you the other one right?
M: That’s correct.
SC: Ok, so I’ll pay $50, he can give me a phone and then you can send him a replacement.
(Note: for those who didn’t notice this “offer” would result in our company giving this customer a brand new free phone WITHOUT having to give up her old phone. FAT CHANCE)
M: Well, actually, the program doesn’t really work like that.
SC: I need a phone today! You have to make him give me a phone!
M: That really wouldn’t be per policy, but even if I did want to have him give you a phone, I could talk to him until I was blue in the face but it’s entirely HIS decision on whether or not you get a phone today.
SC: I drove all the way out here, got a babysitter for my kids, (Alert! Alert! Pity Party underway captain!) and spent the gas money to make it here and now you can’t do anything for me?? Make him give me a phone!!
M: Unfortunately I can’t do anything for you to get you a phone today.
SC: That is SO UNFAIR! *click*
ATTENTION CELL PHONE USERS: Studies have shown that it IS possible to survive more than 24 hours without a cell phone. Please remember this next time you call in pleading with me because you desperately need a phone right away.
International Idiocy
SC: I have charges on my bill for roaming in Canada, roaming is included in my plan!
M: Well, yes roaming in the UNITED STATES is included, roaming in other countries is not.
SC: WHAT?? No one told me that, I was told FREE roaming with my plan.
M: Yes sir, in the US, NOT in other countries. International roaming is costly, a plan that included all international roaming at no charge would be the deal of the century.
SC: Well the roaming should include Canada, it’s right freaking next to us!
M: That is true sir, but despite their proximity they are still a DIFFERENT country and as such, roaming there is NOT covered by your plan.
SC: Well that sucks. Thanks…I guess.
I cannot believe that people do not realize that cell service in OTHER COUNTRIES is most certainly NOT FREE. I really did think this was common knowledge.
Secret Raging Man
Most of the account notes I see are pretty mundane, but some are..well, interesting. Here’s one I happened upon last week:
BEWARE OF CUST, HE’S AFTER CREDITS! GAVE ONE SOB STORY TO ME AND A DIFFERENT ONE TO MY SUP. CUST WILL DISGUISE VOICE TO GAIN INFLUENCE.
Ok, so he would ask for a credit using different accents or something or perhaps try to claim he is some big shot businessman/poltician/law enforcment officer?? Sorry, just because you claim to be a cop doesn’t mean you get undeserved credits.
Gimme! Gimme! More! More!
SC: I was supposed to get a monthly discount on my bill from May forward when I started service because I work for company XXXXX.
M: I see here you do qualify for a discount, but none has been set up.
SC: So in other words I’ve been overpaying for six months?
M: Well, I suppose that’s one way to put it. It usually takes two bill cycles for the discount to take effect.
SC: I was told about that in the store, but I was also told when it takes effect I would receive a backdated credit for the months I didn’t have it. I’ve been trying to get this sorted out for months.
(I review the notes and did see a call back in July when she’d asked about this same thing, so her comments did have some merit)
M: Well usually we only go back 60 days on billing errors, but let me see what we can do.
(I check it with my sup, who actually says we can credit back ALL SIX MONTHS of the discount charges worth over $250 in credits to this woman. The sup must have been in a really good mood because she’s usually not that generous. I explain to the customer that we can credit back…)
SC: Well that’s good to hear. But you know, I’ve been so inconvenienced by this and it’s taken so many months to get it straight, is there any kind of a courtesy credit I could get?
M: Well we did just agree to credit your account for all the incorrect months, which is a pretty substantial amount.
SC: I just made a payment of $150, I think you should give me a credit to match that payment.
(Damn you woman! We just credited you nearly 300 bones and now you have the nerve to ask for ONE HUNDRED AND FIFTY more?? I might’ve given you a few dollars, but NOT 150!)
M: Well, we don’t usually give out courtesy credits for that much.
SC: I just can’t believe it’s taken so long to get this done.
M: I do apologize for the delay, but fortunately we were able to credit you every penny you were owed. Is there anything else I can assist you with today?
SC: Well, I guess not…Too bad you won’t give me that credit…
Every week I think humankind can't get any dumber, then the next week I am proven wrong.
As the mind roams away…
SC: I have charges on my bill for roaming minutes but I have roaming included in my plan.
M: Ah yes, I see the charges. They are actually for overage minutes, not roaming.
SC: But it says roaming 20 cents a minute.
M: Well, yes but what you are looking at is the breakdown of overage minutes, some of which were roaming and some of which were not.
SC: I have roaming IN my plan, it says right up above on the bill “roaming included”
M: Yes, but if you go over your plan minutes, you have to pay for that, regardless of if they are roaming or not.
SC: Then why does the bill say “roaming included”?
M: Because not all plans include roaming, yours does.
SC: Then why I am billed for it?!
M: (wanting to bang my head on the desk) Let’s go over this again, those charges are for OVERAGE minutes that were incurred while you were roaming. A roaming plan means there are no extra charges for roaming, not that you have unlimited roaming minutes.
SC: I have roaming in my plan!
M: Those are OVERAGE minutes ma’am, and are not included in your plan.
SC: May I speak to a supervisor please, I just don’t understand this. (and yet you seem so fast on the uptake...)
M: Very well (flag down sup)
Sup takes over the call and repeats what I explaine to the woman about FIVE times before she finally, sort of gets it, and stops whining. After the call my sup and I had this exchange:
Sup: That woman was dumber than a bag of rocks!
M: Oh come on now, that’s insulting to the bag of rocks.
Freaking kids!
Evidently one of the managers thought it would be fun to bring her kids to work. I suppose I could tolerate them writing all over our whiteboards, so long as they were quiet, but somehow the little brats got into a room that controls EVERY LIGHT in the center. First they go off, then on, off, on, off, on, then they start blinking wildly, causing the two sups present to dash to the back and take care of the problem. After that, the kids were nowhere to be found for the rest of the day.
Waaaaah! Phone! Waaaah!
SC: I drove all the way here to do an exchange because my phone is broken but the guy inside is being rude to me. He says he can’t do anything because he’s only a dealer and not a company store. One of your reps told me this was a company store.
M: I do apologize for the confusion but dealers are limited in what they can do compared to corporate stores.
SC: Look, I NEED a phone today. I have insurance on my phone, why can’t I go in there and pay him $50 for a replacement phone?
M: Unfortunately it is a dealer store, they won’t be able to do that for you.
SC: (whiny voice) Why not, I need a phone today. I came all the way out here, you should cut me a break.
M: As I said dealers are limited in what they can do…
SC: Ok how about this, to get a replacement through the mail, I pay you $50, you send me a new phone and I send you the other one right?
M: That’s correct.
SC: Ok, so I’ll pay $50, he can give me a phone and then you can send him a replacement.
(Note: for those who didn’t notice this “offer” would result in our company giving this customer a brand new free phone WITHOUT having to give up her old phone. FAT CHANCE)
M: Well, actually, the program doesn’t really work like that.
SC: I need a phone today! You have to make him give me a phone!
M: That really wouldn’t be per policy, but even if I did want to have him give you a phone, I could talk to him until I was blue in the face but it’s entirely HIS decision on whether or not you get a phone today.
SC: I drove all the way out here, got a babysitter for my kids, (Alert! Alert! Pity Party underway captain!) and spent the gas money to make it here and now you can’t do anything for me?? Make him give me a phone!!
M: Unfortunately I can’t do anything for you to get you a phone today.
SC: That is SO UNFAIR! *click*
ATTENTION CELL PHONE USERS: Studies have shown that it IS possible to survive more than 24 hours without a cell phone. Please remember this next time you call in pleading with me because you desperately need a phone right away.
International Idiocy
SC: I have charges on my bill for roaming in Canada, roaming is included in my plan!
M: Well, yes roaming in the UNITED STATES is included, roaming in other countries is not.
SC: WHAT?? No one told me that, I was told FREE roaming with my plan.
M: Yes sir, in the US, NOT in other countries. International roaming is costly, a plan that included all international roaming at no charge would be the deal of the century.
SC: Well the roaming should include Canada, it’s right freaking next to us!
M: That is true sir, but despite their proximity they are still a DIFFERENT country and as such, roaming there is NOT covered by your plan.
SC: Well that sucks. Thanks…I guess.
I cannot believe that people do not realize that cell service in OTHER COUNTRIES is most certainly NOT FREE. I really did think this was common knowledge.
Secret Raging Man
Most of the account notes I see are pretty mundane, but some are..well, interesting. Here’s one I happened upon last week:
BEWARE OF CUST, HE’S AFTER CREDITS! GAVE ONE SOB STORY TO ME AND A DIFFERENT ONE TO MY SUP. CUST WILL DISGUISE VOICE TO GAIN INFLUENCE.
Ok, so he would ask for a credit using different accents or something or perhaps try to claim he is some big shot businessman/poltician/law enforcment officer?? Sorry, just because you claim to be a cop doesn’t mean you get undeserved credits.
Gimme! Gimme! More! More!
SC: I was supposed to get a monthly discount on my bill from May forward when I started service because I work for company XXXXX.
M: I see here you do qualify for a discount, but none has been set up.
SC: So in other words I’ve been overpaying for six months?
M: Well, I suppose that’s one way to put it. It usually takes two bill cycles for the discount to take effect.
SC: I was told about that in the store, but I was also told when it takes effect I would receive a backdated credit for the months I didn’t have it. I’ve been trying to get this sorted out for months.
(I review the notes and did see a call back in July when she’d asked about this same thing, so her comments did have some merit)
M: Well usually we only go back 60 days on billing errors, but let me see what we can do.
(I check it with my sup, who actually says we can credit back ALL SIX MONTHS of the discount charges worth over $250 in credits to this woman. The sup must have been in a really good mood because she’s usually not that generous. I explain to the customer that we can credit back…)
SC: Well that’s good to hear. But you know, I’ve been so inconvenienced by this and it’s taken so many months to get it straight, is there any kind of a courtesy credit I could get?
M: Well we did just agree to credit your account for all the incorrect months, which is a pretty substantial amount.
SC: I just made a payment of $150, I think you should give me a credit to match that payment.
(Damn you woman! We just credited you nearly 300 bones and now you have the nerve to ask for ONE HUNDRED AND FIFTY more?? I might’ve given you a few dollars, but NOT 150!)
M: Well, we don’t usually give out courtesy credits for that much.
SC: I just can’t believe it’s taken so long to get this done.
M: I do apologize for the delay, but fortunately we were able to credit you every penny you were owed. Is there anything else I can assist you with today?
SC: Well, I guess not…Too bad you won’t give me that credit…
Every week I think humankind can't get any dumber, then the next week I am proven wrong.
(
) Sorry.
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