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Perhaps the Creepiest Human Being in Existance

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  • Perhaps the Creepiest Human Being in Existance

    This semester, I signed up for Creative Writing as a fun class to break from the barrage of Calculus classes and science classes; just one nice, calm, relaxing, fun class for me to enjoy.

    The first day of class was chaos. They combined two classes in one room. I have honestly never felt more like a sardine in my life. A grand total of 5 people were seatless and had to pop a squat on the radiator. We rearranged tables and added chairs multipe times, not to mention there is a guy in class who uses a walker to get around so we need room for him to move about. It was a lengthy process, but we eventually got somewhat situated and went around the room doing introductions. One guy was wearing a Red Roof Inn uniform, so the teacher asked if he just came from work.

    Creeper: No.
    Teacher: Are you going straight to work after this?
    Creeper: No.
    Teacher: .......okay.

    After introductions, we wrote practice poems based on a color and what that color made us think of. Afterwards, we got the chance to share our poems. A few people shared theirs and then Creeper stood up.

    Creeper: Just so you know, this isn't about my penis.
    Teacher: Umm.....ok.......go ahead then
    Creeper: (I don't remember exactly what he said, but it sounded like he wrote it about his girlfriend. He was saying "you always make me smile....you're the best friend I've ever had.....we always have so much fun together.....and the like)
    Teacher: Very good.
    Creeper: Actually, it was about my penis

    Cue everyone in the entire room giving each other the "did he just say what I think he said" look.

    Luckily, he wasn't there for class 2. I'm guessing he either dropped or was kicked out. Now, Eminem Wanna-be moved in. I am very close to removing his tongue.

    He raps everything he says....badly. For example: We had to name something we hate. He stands up and says, "Old lady drivers, man. They so slow! They worse than minivans"! Another time, the teacher names a few different ways to arrange the tables and asks us what sounds best. He stands up and raps, "This is what I says teach. This whole thing is terrible! Don't know what to say. Just leave the table". I mean, in what universe does terrible rhyme with table. Yes, they both begin with "t" and end with "ble" but that doesn't mean they rhyme.

    Then, we began discussing an article the teacher asked us to read. It was a lovely piece in which the author pressed readers to ask questions about the world around us and think about all the "simple" things we take for granted. For example: You see a wooden table. What type of wood is it made of? Who made it? Who invented the table? Where did the tree it came from live? Why was that type of wood used? How was it made? Who sat under that tree before it was cut down? How old was the tree? Is it held together with glue or screws? When was the table made? Who owned the table before? What did people use before tables were invented? How can the table be made better?
    Instead of asking questions like this, we see a table and take it at face value. We see something simple, ordinary, and, therefore, boring. We are facinated by the big, the bold, the exciting while "ordinary" things are overlooked.

    Anyway, Eminem Wanna-be was asked what he thought about this article.

    EW: I hated it man! I thought it sucked!! I won't read it again!
    Teacher: What didn't you like about it?
    EW: .....everything. (which roughly translated to "I didn't read it so I don't know what it's about")
    Teacher: Just pick one thing in specific.
    EW: The lines. They was janked! It didn't look all fine.
    Teacher: Could you be a bit more specific? What about the lines did you not like?
    EW: Well...um...just look at 'em man! This paragraph has 4 lines, this one has 2, this one has 3, 1,3,4,2,3,4,2,3,3,1, it's all ganked!
    Teacher: .....okay then...next?
    Last edited by Kisa; 01-11-2013, 03:32 AM.
    Answers: $1
    Correct Answers: $2
    Answers that require thought: $5
    Dumb looks are still free.

  • #2
    I swear, some people confuse 'creativity' with 'incoherence.'

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    • #3
      Quoth Pixilated View Post
      I swear, some people confuse 'creativity' with 'incoherence.'
      You totally made my day with that!

      It also reminds me of another quote I've heard: "just because no one understands you, doesn't mean you're an artist"
      My formula for living is quite simple. I get up in the morning and I go to bed at night. In between, I occupy myself as best I can.---Cary Grant

      Comment


      • #4
        On the note of "creepy" the crazy lunatic I dealt with for a good two years I believe has him beat (put a thread out on her the other day because I knew CS just loves stuff like that). With idiots like that though, you just roll your eyes and move along. And of course, make estimates on how long it'll be before he flunks out.
        Some people just need a high five...

        In the face with the back of a chair....

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        • #5
          Sounds like someone's trying to live up to the phrase, "too cool for school." Hell, no one's forcing him to be there. If he hates it, he should just up and leave.
          When you start at zero, everything's progress.

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          • #6
            Poetry doesn't have to rhyme. In fact, some of the best poetry does not rhyme.

            Rap usually does; it's part of the art form. But this guy actually needs to take this class, if only to learn how to write some decent rap verses.

            Oh, hell, what am I thinking . . . .
            They say that God only gives us what we can handle. Apparently, God thinks I'm a bad ass.

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