Would anyone else talk to their mother like this?

[platypus]

I would NEVER speak to my mother like that, she's a sweet southern bell, my father, the New York yank is a different matter. I probably wouldn't unload on him in front of strangers, but our loving power struggles can lead to similar language.

My thought is that maybe this woman was a primary care taker for a parent suffering from some kind of dementia, or just plan old person crankiness. The language is a tad inappropriate, but maybe this was the final snap, I've seen a friend known for his pacifism, slug an extreme talker after a week long camping trip. Anyone who has been cornered by one knows the pain, imagine living all your life with that person. Sorry you had to take that on!

[greensinestro]

All things being equal, I wouldn't speak to anyone like that.

However, I can't say how i would behave if, for example, I was compelled to become sole carer for a parent with severe dementia, who literally drove me insane with frustration because even the simplest thing was beyond them.

Obviously, we have no way of knowing if the situation in your caller's house is anything like that, or if the daughter was indeed a genuinely abusive person, but its something to bear in mind.

All true, except when it got to her getting annoyed with me for needing to verify her info, then being called "stupid" because she was frustrated with her mother......I still don't think it justifies how this lady acted while on the call. Sure, perhaps one would be compelled to get angry and upset with a mother that has a condition like this, but I don't think that is a good reason to curse her out, ie "shut your damn mouth" or "shut the hell up". I might have said something like, "Mom, can you please be quiet a moment so I can finish this for you?" Again, I don't think it's appropriate for an unknown stranger on the other end of the call, and someone you particularly will never meet in person, to hear an exchange like this.

[Foxglove8778]

I could never treat my mother like that. I'm not sure I could treat anyone like that.

[aurelemsrealm]

I inherited a very sarcastic sense of humor from my mother. Her family is known for this particular trait, so I come by it honestly. My father's family is very argumentative and tempermental, and I've also inherited those traits from him. So, we have a lot of friendly, and sometimes not so friendly exchanges of words in my family. Even so, I still manage to keep a civil tongue in most serious situations where a bit of tact is required. The only time I lose my cool is when someone is being extremely stupid or obnoxious, and I've had enough of it.

[Bloodsoul]

Ah, it all really depends on how much will power you have when it comes to controlling one's temper. I think I'm going towards the route that this person was at the end of their ropes in trying to deal with the situation; any sort of extra stress would certainly make even the nicest person snap and a lapse of judgment often makes someone say something they'll soon regret.

[Skandranon]

I talk to my mother that way, but because she can be a right bitca sometimes. This is the woman who tells me, frequently, that my dear friends will eventually get tired of me, that I couldn't possibly ever be a normal human being, and that the man I love would never get with me because I'm fat and ugly.

Believe you me, I restrain myself around her for civility sake, but we still reach a level similar to that call.

[Becks]

It's one thing joking around. I wouldn't joke around like that, especially while on the phone with a complete stranger.

I think the customer in this case was absolutely sucky.

[RebeccaOTool]

That is awful.

[myswtghst]

My family is huge into teasing eachother--it's a running gag with me and my brother that my mom is older than the dinosaurs, and even our extended family (aunt, uncle and cousin) tend to get in on the teasing--we just spread it around and use it as a way to show affection. My family also is not shy about cussing around each other--we joke that we learned how to swear by watching sports with my dad.

That being said, I never talk like this in public/with a stranger on the phone. Granted, we don't know the full situation, and it's possible there is a REASON she treats her mother like this--but it's not an excuse to be so awful to a stranger, and to your mother with a stranger on the phone, forced to listen in, IMO.

[Andara Bledin]

The fact that she put in you the middle of that is very sucky.

However, without a lot more information about what was actually going on at her end of the call, there is no way to know whether the woman was yoked with too much to handle, or if she was just abusive.

^-.-^

[AFpheonix]

Yep, sounds like a classy lady, all right.
If she needed to cancel and had been trying to do so for 4 days, perhaps she should consider going to a place where she can't hear her mother to do so. The extra verbal abuse for the rep was a nice touch too.

I'm envisioning overweight woman with hairy legs, rollers and a hair net, dirty pink bathrobe, and a cigarette hanging out of the corner of her lips.

[blas]

We need to stop watching re-runs of Beavis and Butthead late at night, AFPhoenix.

[Kiwi]

ie "shut your damn mouth" or "shut the hell up".

In my family the word "damn" isnt considered a swear word and "shut the hell up" is used quite frequently and thats by everyone including my mother. We used to pick a subject for debate at the dinner table and fly at it. Kyle got a shock the first night he had dinner with us when we really got going and then stopped and said stuff like "pass the butter please" then went right back at it. His family sits in almost silence while eating and he could NEVER joke around with his parents, they are very stiff and formal and proper. (Im dreading them meeting actually, talk about clash of the cultures)

However because its not considered a "bad" thing its not taken as a "bad" thing. So for this woman the situation could be completely different?

Tone of voice means alot, you could hear the womans tone and we cant....so you may be totally right. She may be nasty and abusive towards her mum.

Could you hear the mothers replies? Im just wondering because my Mum gives it back just as good as she got it (and she spoke to my grandparents the same way) but out family is loud and opinioniated and boisterious. You really have to let some four letter words fly to show your angry with my family.It all depends on the family dynamic, if your family is like mine then its what she said wouldnt be considered out of the ordinary, if the family is more formal and uptight then it could very well be considered extremely rude and abusive.

[meme]

I would never talk to my mother or anyone like that, certainly not while talking on the phone conducting business. And, if my mother heard me talking to someone on the phone like Ms. Classy was to you, I'd get a smack (not that I would do that-I was raised right).

Sometimes, I hear stuff very similar to what you heard, but it's usually directed at children

I wish that people would learn to use the phone during quiet times or at least go in another room away from the annoying person.

[BookstoreEscapee]

On a lighter note, maybe mom is just getting her revenge for all the times she was on the phone when daughter was little, and got interrupted with "Mommy...can I have a drink? .. Mommy I want a snack. .. Mommy I can I go out to play? .. Mommy what's for dinner? .. Moooommmmmmyyyyyy....."