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I'm not great at sympathy.

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  • I'm not great at sympathy.

    This is a self sighting really, because I must have come across as rather rude and insensitive.

    I don't tend to be the most sympathetic person, I don't mean it in a nasty way, but I don't coddle people, also sometimes my brain to mouth filter goes on the fritz, so I'll make jokes intended to keep things light-hearted that sometimes people don't find very funny .

    So I was serving on the till, and while I'm dealing with one gentleman I notice there's a woman having a bit of a whine. She'd gone and taken the corner of her thumb nail off, so a little bit of the nail bed is exposed. It's a small amount but to be fair probably does hurt a fair bit. But this woman is complaining about it to the point she's showing other customers her thumb trying to get sympathy I suppose?

    It's her turn to be served and, she starts telling me about her injury. I try my best to be polite and give the usual platitudes etc. Then she shows me and I just blurt out "Oh well, never mind, it'll grow back." I just managed to stop myself before giving her the age old "Well you have another one don't you?".

    She looked very offended, I did quickly apologize and say that it wasn't very sympathtic of me, but ruined it with: "I don't tend to be the best person for sympathy unless you have blood gushing and a limb hanging off". It was intended as a joke, but I don't think she took it that way... I really wonder why they let me talk to people.

  • #2
    Quoth KnittedPuppy View Post
    But this woman is complaining about it to the point she's showing other customers her thumb trying to get sympathy I suppose?

    It's her turn to be served and, she starts telling me about her injury. I try my best to be polite and give the usual platitudes etc.
    lol, it sounds like she was just wanting attention, and you did try to be nice. Really, who goes around to random strangers like that? Might as well be saying "look, mommy, I have an owie."
    Replace anger management with stupidity management.

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    • #3
      Quoth notalwaysright View Post
      lol, it sounds like she was just wanting attention, and you did try to be nice. Really, who goes around to random strangers like that? Might as well be saying "look, mommy, I have an owie."
      I did try, I think it would have been helped if I'd stopped talking sooner

      Also I've noticed we get alot of that sort of thing here, I mean people trying to get sympathy for various aliments and minor injuries. We do sell painkillers, cold and flu things, plasters and what have you, so I suppose we tend attracted the walking wounded .

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      • #4
        I'm not great at sympathy either, I think it's because receiving it makes me so uncomfortable that I'm not sure what other people are trying to get out of the exchange. Just remember, if you say to a whining 'injured' customer 'Well, it's a long way from your heart' you too could get written up for generally being a smart ass.
        Pain and suffering are inevitable...misery is optional.

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        • #5
          I would have been grossed out and told her I didn't need to see that.
          When you start at zero, everything's progress.

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          • #6
            Geeze! I just took a corner of my thumbnail off down past the quick with a potato peeler tonight, and there was blood and everything. I hissed at the bit of pain, washed it off, and got back to making dinner. That's what adults do. Only five year-olds whine about boo-boos to everyone and sundry.
            Sorry, my cow died so I don't need your bull

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            • #7
              Pretty much everyone alive has trimmed their fingernails a little too close to the quick at some point in their lives...it hurts and it sucks, but all it takes is a few days to grow out again, and everything is fine.

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              • #8
                Quoth Monterey Jack View Post
                Pretty much everyone alive has trimmed their fingernails a little too close to the quick at some point in their lives...it hurts and it sucks, but all it takes is a few days to grow out again, and everything is fine.
                I did it more with my toenails than my fingernails because I had to keep them shorter for dance. Ever had to put all your weight on a toenail you cut too short? That is pure agony, plain and simple. Even just wearing pointe shoes hurt because I could never find a pair quite wide enough for my duck feet. So yeah. No sympathy for bit-my-thumbnail-too-short lady.
                I am no longer of capable of the emotion you humans call “compassion”. Though I can feign it in exchange for an hourly wage. (Gravekeeper)

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                • #9
                  *snerks* I was four when I had a thumbnail removed and I didn't whine. I was proud and gladly showed it off during show and tell at kindergarten. I was a very strange child...

                  So, yeah, my sympathy for that would be a game of "one up" with her. So, I'm glad none of the customers I'd ever dealt with did that.
                  If I make no sense, I apologize. I'm constantly interrupted by an actual toddler.

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                  • #10
                    I'm a bit relieved that I'm not quite perhaps as an awful insensitive person as I thought I was lol. But I should be more careful, as NecessaryCatharsis said, I don't want to get a complaint for trying to be a smart ass when it's not even intended.

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                    • #11
                      I'm usually a sympathetic person but that kind of behaviour pisses me right off. She'd have gotten none from me either.

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                      • #12
                        Quoth KnittedPuppy View Post
                        I don't want to get a complaint for trying to be a smart ass when it's not even intended.
                        When I'm being a smarty pants, I mean it. Just depends on if the recipient victim is smart enough to catch it.


                        Do be careful to not get fired. Know what you can get away with. This has been a PSA.
                        I am no longer of capable of the emotion you humans call “compassion”. Though I can feign it in exchange for an hourly wage. (Gravekeeper)

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                        • #13
                          Quoth EvilEmpryss View Post
                          Geeze! I just took a corner of my thumbnail off down past the quick with a potato peeler tonight, and there was blood and everything. I hissed at the bit of pain, washed it off, and got back to making dinner. That's what adults do. Only five year-olds whine about boo-boos to everyone and sundry.
                          I've accidentally sliced my finger years ago while washing dishes . . . just wrapped it up and kept right on about my evening.

                          I don't go to the hospital unless I think I absolutely need to. I like to call it "putting on my big girl panties and dealing with it."

                          But then, I'm not an attention seeking whore either like this SC sounds like.
                          Human Resources - the adult version of "I'm telling Mom." - Agent Anthony "Tony" DiNozzo (NCIS)

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                          • #14
                            Quoth DGoddessChardonnay View Post
                            I like to call it "putting on my big girl panties and dealing with it."
                            LOL! That's the line I was going to use, but edited at the last minute! It's exactly how I feel about it, though.
                            Sorry, my cow died so I don't need your bull

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                            • #15
                              Your personality and responses sound just like me. Especially the "Unless there's blood gushing out or a limb falling off" part.
                              My Fur Affinity Page:https://www.furaffinity.net/user/thetigress/
                              My Weasyl Page: https://www.weasyl.com/profile/thetigress

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