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  • Phone Shoppers...Urgh

    This one's actually partial annoyance at customers and partial annoyance at the people answering the phones at the customer service desk.

    Guys, please for the love of god stop sending calls regarding items down to any ol' department willy-nilly. Allow me to specifically mention that Trade is not the miscellaneous items department. If you don't know where the item a customer wants is, we may not actually be the department you're looking for! Shocking but true. In the last week I suspect I've taken more calls for Plumbing than Plumbing has.

    Now, on to the customers.

    Guys....first off, when I answer the phone with "*company* *location* Trade Desk, this is Latekin!" the chances are, you made it to the trade desk! I'm gonna be more than slightly irritated to hear you querulously ask "is this the Trade department?"

    Now, before we go any further, try calling from a phone line that isn't awful. Some of you sound like you're calling from the bottom of the Mariana Trench. I can't help you if I can't hear you over Cthulu's flatulent emissions.

    Moving on, I totally get sometimes needing to check and see if we have an item in stock, but you need to actually be able to tell me what that item is. "The thing that goes into the other thing that is steel and makes a right angle, you know the thing." is not even remotely helpful. Yes, that is an example some genius actually expected me to find. Less obnoxious examples include asking me for a ladder, but not knowing the brand, the height it reaches, the material it is made of, or even what colour it is. Your assurances that "it's $89.00!" does not actually help, since A: customers are very unlikely to actually have the correct price (wishful thinking is a powerful force), and B: I couldn't search by price, even if I wanted to. Do not make me search through 300+ SKU codes to find your dang ladder.

    Additionally, no, I cannot go check the shelf. I am glued to the desk during my shift, I am not allowed to leave, unless someone else is willing to cover for me. And with the frequency of phone shopping calls I receive, I'd never actually be at the desk. I can try to put you through to a staff member on floor, but they may be already helping some other hapless phone shopper. Tough luck in such circumstances. Either way, we're gonna have to put you on hold to find out. Don't bitch to me that this is inconvenient, being stuck on the phone when I have more important shit to do is somewhat inconvenient to me, but I'm not getting all pissy at you.

    Finally, if it's not urgent, just come into the dang store. There's one in every goddamn suburb just about, I'm sure you can find a way to get your ass off the couch and into the actual location you need to be at to get your shit together.

    Basically, if you're phone shopping when you could otherwise avoid doing so, I am not going to be too pleased to hear you on the other end of my phone line.
    Patient has severely impacted cranial rectosis. There's probably no cure. - Overheard in ER

  • #2
    Quoth Latekin View Post

    Basically, if you're phone shopping when you could otherwise avoid doing so, I am not going to be too pleased to hear you on the other end of my phone line.
    This.

    Also, I facepalm so hard when I tell somebody over the phone that we don't have what they're looking for, and they tell me "Thanks, you saved me a trip." My livelihood depends on you making the trip out to the swamp and buying things.
    Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. Study hard. Be evil.

    "I never said I wasn't a horrible person."--Me, almost daily

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    • #3
      Cthulhu's Flatulent Emissions would be a great name for a band







      Now as to the punishment he'll inflict on you for spelling his name wrong...
      The Copyright Monster has made me tell you that my avatar is courtesy of the wonderful Alice XZ.And you don't want to annoy the Copyright Monster.

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      • #4
        Quoth Latekin View Post
        Finally, if it's not urgent, just come into the dang store.
        Or look on the company's website. Yes, it's the 21st Century, the Internet is a thing. You can not only find what you're looking for, you can see the exact name and the SKU or UPC as well, to make it easier for the CS rep to find what you're looking for.

        Drives me crazy, these folks who "need a fabric, it's blue with flowers." Do you have any idea how many blue flowered fabrics we have? And what type of fabric: quilting, apparel, upholstery, utility? It's your project, do some freaking research before you come into or call the store.
        I don't have an attitude problem. You have a perception problem.
        My LiveJournal
        A page we can all agree with!

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        • #5
          Your assurances that "it's $89.00!" does not actually help, since A: customers are very unlikely to actually have the correct price
          Even if you found it, they would say, "No, that's not the one!"

          Do you have any idea how many blue flowered fabrics we have?
          Probably not. The last time they were in a fabric store was 1959 and there were all of 12.
          When you start at zero, everything's progress.

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          • #6
            Just had a call this evening asking if we sold adult diapers. Yes, yes we do. We may not have canned asparagus (yes I was really asked that on Christmas Day) but we are a pharmacy and we carry more medically type products.

            One night I got caught on the phone with a woman who wanted know all the types of vitamin E we carried. Look lady, we have 27 feet of vitamins, tons of different brands and each of those probably have at least 4 different types. How about no?
            I would have a nice day, but I have other things to do.

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            • #7
              Quoth Trixie View Post
              One night I got caught on the phone with a woman who wanted know all the types of vitamin E we carried. Look lady, we have 27 feet of vitamins, tons of different brands and each of those probably have at least 4 different types. How about no?
              Oh Trixie, I'm sorry you got my customer She stands in front of the 27 feet of vitamins with 5 shelves each foot (you forgot to mention that part!) and asks "which one of these sells the most?"

              SMH
              Last edited by Ree; 07-11-2016, 10:04 AM. Reason: Trimmed quote

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              • #8
                Oh yeah, get plenty of them too. "Which one is the best?" I really want to say I dunno, I buy my stuff at Walmart because ours is too expensive. I usually send them over to the pharmacy to get rid...I mean send them to a highly trained professional who can answer their questions.
                I would have a nice day, but I have other things to do.

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                • #9
                  Not too long ago, I had to take a call that was routed to HBA. Guy on the phone asks me "How much per pill do you charge for Cialis?"

                  Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. Study hard. Be evil.

                  "I never said I wasn't a horrible person."--Me, almost daily

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Quoth Teefies2 View Post
                    Oh Trixie, I'm sorry you got my customer She stands in front of the 27 feet of vitamins with 5 shelves each foot (you forgot to mention that part!) and asks "which one of these sells the most?"

                    SMH
                    I've actually seen customers like this. I was standing in line at the pharmacy when a woman cut in line and asked the tech who was ringing people out if she could help her with vitamins. The tech sent the pharmacist out to help the customer, and kept handing out scripts. Until it was my turn that lady kept quizzing the pharmacist on vitamins, and she was still there when I left, although the pharmacist had gone back to work.

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                    • #11
                      Quoth Trixie View Post
                      Oh yeah, get plenty of them too. "Which one is the best?" I really want to say I dunno, I buy my stuff at Walmart because ours is too expensive. I usually send them over to the pharmacy to get rid...I mean send them to a highly trained professional who can answer their questions.

                      Comment

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