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Two burps for the day (and still 2 hours to go, maybe I'll get lucky!):
The key to your . . . keys
We've got a temp for our every other week, horrendous, hated Saturdays. Same dude's gonna work 'em all. Same dude's a bit slow on the uptake.
Me: You want the volunteer locker key?
TortoiselikeTemp: No.
Me: *shrug*
TT: I mean yes. Yeah, okay.
Me: *gives out key*
TT: I'll just put this stuff in there so I don't have to carry it around.
Me: Okay.
TT: *puts stuff away* I'll leave the key on the desk.
Me: Oh, you can hang out it it for the day.
TT: *hands me the key*
Me:
I swear we had the same conversation two weeks ago. He (this like balding 40/50 year old dweeby guy) only dumps his keys in the locker, I swear. And he always tries to give me back the locker key. This is so not the point of a locker.
Flori-duh
FlusteredfromFlorida: *comes to desk* I need a pass for the internet.
Me: Do you want to use the wireless or did you want to get on one of our computers? *gestures to wall-o-computers*
FF: I just need to check this ONE thing on FACEBOOK on my PHONE and---!
Me: *interruptinglibrariansays* So you need the wireless password. *prints one off and hands it to her*
FF: *stares at wireless receipt like I've handed her a messy diaper* I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH THIS I ONLY NEED TO GO ON FACEBOOK.
Me: *slight pause while dialing back instructions from DealingWithThePublicDumb to Can'tWipeOwnAssWithoutDirectionsDumb* *opens mouth to speak*
FF: Just get me on the computer I don't know how to do that I just walk into a place and this works *waves phone around like magical interwebs will beam into it and connect her with the glorious facebook*
Me: Okay, if you have a library card I can show you how to sign up on our reservation computer or I can give you a guest pass.
FF: I'M FROM FLORIDA!
Me: *stares. What does a native Floridian looks like anyway? Is there a sticker? Do the pinkies face the wrong way? Maybe your ears are upside down?* *prints guest pass* You're number five, just behind you.
FF: Which one? Is this it?!
Me: *trying NOT to use my sing-songy sweet IDON'TLIKEYOU voice* The one that says five.
So, folks, should I have recognized her as a Person From Florida? And if so, what should I have been looking for?
The key to your . . . keys
We've got a temp for our every other week, horrendous, hated Saturdays. Same dude's gonna work 'em all. Same dude's a bit slow on the uptake.
Me: You want the volunteer locker key?
TortoiselikeTemp: No.
Me: *shrug*
TT: I mean yes. Yeah, okay.
Me: *gives out key*
TT: I'll just put this stuff in there so I don't have to carry it around.
Me: Okay.
TT: *puts stuff away* I'll leave the key on the desk.
Me: Oh, you can hang out it it for the day.
TT: *hands me the key*
Me:
I swear we had the same conversation two weeks ago. He (this like balding 40/50 year old dweeby guy) only dumps his keys in the locker, I swear. And he always tries to give me back the locker key. This is so not the point of a locker.
Flori-duh
FlusteredfromFlorida: *comes to desk* I need a pass for the internet.
Me: Do you want to use the wireless or did you want to get on one of our computers? *gestures to wall-o-computers*
FF: I just need to check this ONE thing on FACEBOOK on my PHONE and---!
Me: *interruptinglibrariansays* So you need the wireless password. *prints one off and hands it to her*
FF: *stares at wireless receipt like I've handed her a messy diaper* I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH THIS I ONLY NEED TO GO ON FACEBOOK.
Me: *slight pause while dialing back instructions from DealingWithThePublicDumb to Can'tWipeOwnAssWithoutDirectionsDumb* *opens mouth to speak*
FF: Just get me on the computer I don't know how to do that I just walk into a place and this works *waves phone around like magical interwebs will beam into it and connect her with the glorious facebook*
Me: Okay, if you have a library card I can show you how to sign up on our reservation computer or I can give you a guest pass.
FF: I'M FROM FLORIDA!
Me: *stares. What does a native Floridian looks like anyway? Is there a sticker? Do the pinkies face the wrong way? Maybe your ears are upside down?* *prints guest pass* You're number five, just behind you.
FF: Which one? Is this it?!
Me: *trying NOT to use my sing-songy sweet IDON'TLIKEYOU voice* The one that says five.
So, folks, should I have recognized her as a Person From Florida? And if so, what should I have been looking for?
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