Move an idea

[evilhomer]

The backstory on this is a woman that I utterly despise. From what was literally the very first time I met her she has shown an inability to give clear instructions, she is always ambiguous and makes questions essential. The fact that she's a rude, condescending bitch and that ambiguous people are one of my biggest peeves makes her one of my most hated persons.

Typically her ambiguity involves saying "this and that go, this and that can stay" while pointing at things right beside each other, or telling us to move "the chair" in a room with 10 different chairs, or of course the good old incorrect and/or made up name for something followed by the "what? you don't know what that is???" This was a new one though. I've got a written workorder telling me to "move back the idea from our storage room back to the 4th floor meeting room". How exactly am I supposed to move a thought? Am I supposed to crack open that skull of yours and move the empty contents?

What kind of a fucking moron is this woman? How can she expect anybody to understand what she meant here? Her problem is that she is so narcissistic that she truly believes that each of her thoughts are so brilliant that they are the only logical thought that can be concluded. Therefore anybody who can't understand her precise meaning is obviously a moron.

Anyways, the "idea" that she wanted moved is more commonly referred to as a meeting room table. When she broke it down to the english that us regular mortals use, it was actually understandable. My best guess for how she came up with the moronic initial instruction was because the wanted it moved into the room to get an "idea" of how it would fit in there. Intelligent people do this with a tape measure and a brain, but when you're a moron, and you've got slaves at your beck and call, you don't need to go to intelligent measures.

[Marmalady]

Am I supposed to crack open that skull of yours and move the empty contents?

I have a feeling that you did actually entertain this as an option for a few delicious seconds.

[eltf177]

And how much is her idiocy and inability to communicate costing her company?

[Kittish]

And how much is her idiocy and inability to communicate costing her company?

Not nearly enough, she's still there.

[mjr]

Just tossing this out there:

Is it possible she actually has some sort of legitimate communication problem, and is somehow compensating for it?

[mhkohne]

Just tossing this out there:

Is it possible she actually has some sort of legitimate communication problem, and is somehow compensating for it?

If you compensate for a problem by being an ass, you get no sympathy and no help.

[MoonCat]

Reminds me of "Betty", my drama-centric co-worker. When she can't think of a word, she substitutes "whatever." So a sentence might come out, "I told her about the whatever but she won't do anything about it!" Or, "I can do that, but make sure you give me the whatever so I have everything I need."

[evilhomer]

Just tossing this out there:

Is it possible she actually has some sort of legitimate communication problem, and is somehow compensating for it?

Not quite sure what you mean, but I'm pretty sure the answer is no. It's not a language issue as English is her first language. Other than stupidity, and her "I'm so awesome, everybody thinks like me" attitude, she has no apparent other issues.

[eltf177]

You forgot "and everybody knows exactly what I'm talking about!"

[evilhomer]

You forgot "and everybody knows exactly what I'm talking about!"

That's not even the case with her. I mean, everybody has this attitude to a certain extent, but with her it's not really "everybody knows exactly what I'm talking about", it's more "if you don't know what I'm talking about, you're an idiot".

Reminds me of "Betty", my drama-centric co-worker. When she can't think of a word, she substitutes "whatever." So a sentence might come out, "I told her about the whatever but she won't do anything about it!" Or, "I can do that, but make sure you give me the whatever so I have everything I need."

It's actually my preference to have somebody call it a 'whatever' or 'thingy' or 'thingamadoodle'. At least then I know that they don't know what they're talking about and I can take it from there. When someone uses a proper name for the wrong item, things get confusing.

That was actually a problem in this case because after we finally determined that the "idea" was in fact a table, she insisted that we grab the "peds" for them as well. (Ped is short for pedestal, a small cabinet that goes under a desk). This led to this exchange:

Me: If it's a boardroom table, it won't have peds.
SC: YES IT DOES!
Me: Okay, well we don't have any peds downstairs.
SC: Yes we do, I saw them this morning, they're wrapped in the yellow tape.
Me: You mean the legs?
SC: No, the peds.
Me: Okay, (pointing) that is a ped, that is a leg, what you have downstairs are legs.
SC: (rolling eyes) Well they're called a ped when they're for a boardroom table.
Me: Actually, they're called a monument when they're a large square base, otherwise they're still called legs.
SC: JUST GET THE PEDS FOR THE TABLE!

Thinking about it now, I'll probably get in trouble over this. This bitch has banned 4 guys from this site for talking back to her and pointing out her stupidity. Hopefully I can be the next lucky winner

[Sulhythal]

Reminds me of "Betty", my drama-centric co-worker. When she can't think of a word, she substitutes "whatever." So a sentence might come out, "I told her about the whatever but she won't do anything about it!" Or, "I can do that, but make sure you give me the whatever so I have everything I need."

My mom is like that, except she uses "Thing"

I kid you not, she once told me to "Get the thing, that's on the thing on the brown thing"

What's scary is I knew what she was talking about. (can't remember it now, exactly, but I did at the time!)

[WishfulSpirit]

Hubby and I do that. You live with someone long enough your minds start to gel. We don't even have to use "thing." I'll be looking around for something in the kitchen, not having said a single word to him, and he'll say "it's on top of the fridge" and there will be the item I'm looking for. Of course, that takes years of experience and I still can't just assume he knows what I'm thinking or the spell breaks and it doesn't work.

[Aragarthiel]

I have the opposite problem. I'll be having a conversation with someone about, say, a friend of mine, and I'll use the word "she" instead of my friend's name. The conversation quickly turns into "Who's moving?" or something of the like. We were JUST talking about this thirty seconds ago.

Usually when I forget a word, I'll try to be specific enough for someone to figure out what I'm talking about. "Can you set this on the red thing the trash can's next to?" is much better than "Can you set this on the thing?"

[workerbee222]

When someone uses a proper name for the wrong item, things get confusing.

I had a colleague who did that with the employee from the cable company setting up our internet. He threw around jargon okay, he just didn't know what it meant. Heck, even the man who set up the connection called his home office and said there were going to be problems; "These customers are their own IT. You can expect a lot of phone calls before we're through." Of course, it didn't work the way the boss wanted it to work, or the way Shifty insisted it could work, so internet suppliers were changed twice over three weeks. Shifty took six hours to set up a wireless router - just like the kind you or I would buy from the store and set up ourselves. When I did it for the first time, I *think* it took 40 minutes. Of course, I assumed I knew nothing and just followed the instructions.

[RealUnimportant]

My ex is a university graduate that cannot tell her right from her left, let alone her right from my right. Thankfully I convinced her to get me a satnav for Xmas early in the relationship, as even when reading directions from Google/Mapquest she'd only ever say "turn THAT way", occasionally pointing forwards for unhelpful emphasis...