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I said don't open the bag!

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  • I said don't open the bag!

    So today, we went through our overflowing Lost and Found. We make two piles: Trash and Donations. Employees can sift throught the Donations for anything they may want before it goes off to Goodwill. I myself got a nice, warm, brand-new winter blazer, tags still on!

    Anyways, there was one bag of crap that caught my eye, 'cause it had porn in it. A mag and I saw a DVD case. Upon closer inspection, though, the porn was...sticky.

    Well, I didn't want to touch it, so I tied up the bag, wrote it all off as trash, and threw it in the trash pile.

    About an our later, I hear from the breakroom CW going "Oh...oh my God...what the...?"

    She walks into the office. "bhskittykatt! Look at this!"

    It was a used penis pump!

    Me: "Why the hell are you touching that!?! I wrote that bag off as trash!"
    CW: "Well, [Housekeeper] thought something useful might be in there."
    Me: "You guys are gross! Bag that sh*t up and get rid of it!"

    A few minutes later:

    CW: "bhskittykatt! This could fit you!" *brings in some lingerie*
    Me: "I DO NOT WANT ANYTHING THAT CAME OUT OF THAT BAG!!!"

    I still can't believe CW went through and touched that stuff! I mean, yeah it's been in there for 30 days so it's probably relatively safe, but still! At least wear some gloves or something.
    Knowledge is knowing that a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.

  • #2
    Disgusting.
    Customers should always be served . . . to the nearest great white.

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    • #3
      And, honestly, who wants used adult toys and clothing? Blech...

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      • #4
        Free porn is good, free sticky porn is bad.
        "Life is tough. It's even tougher if you're stupid" Redd Foxx as Al Royal - The Royal Family - Pilot Episode - 1991.

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        • #5
          Quoth Gerrinson View Post
          And, honestly, who wants used adult toys and clothing? Blech...
          There's a fetish for everything. >_>
          Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. Study hard. Be evil.

          "I never said I wasn't a horrible person."--Me, almost daily

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