I still can't believe this happened. I've never been through something like this before. Last night at around 1:15 a very dear friend who is like a big brother to me called me. Said he was in the hospital. He'd had a quintuple bypass 2 months ago, but he said this time it was his wife's turn. He said he could use a hand, so I went out to the hospital to see him. The following is copied and pasted from what I told someone on skype, because I can't type this all again. I can't.
I got to the hospital and John told me that his wife, Andrea, seized and turned about 5 different shades of grey. He said she had been FINE all day. They made candy and watched a couple of movies. Then they were getting ready for bed and she remembered her phone was in her car. She's an on-call IT tech for her company, so she needs her phone. She never made it to the car, she went to the bathroom instead. She called to him suddenly and he went to see what was wrong because she sounded different. She said she thought she had passed out. Then she had a seizure. He called 911 and the paramedics got there within about 10 minutes. She was responsive, answering their questions, and they sent him to the hospital to check her in.
So we were sitting there and then at about 1:30 the nurse came out and said we should go wait in the Family room back in the ER. He's like a big brother to me, but since I am not blood family and his 2 sons were on their way, I said I'd wait in the lobby. about 2 minutes later, the nurse came back out and said, "Pumpkin, he's going to need you back there." My heart sank. I got back there and he said, "She's dead. Her heart stopped 20 minutes ago. They're doing CPR." I said they'd bring her around, they HAD to. Then the doctor came in and said they had her intubated and were doing everything they could but her heart wasn't responding and at that point he wasn't sure if she'd pull through. About 2 minutes later he came back. He asked John if he wanted to go back and say goodbye before he called it. So he did. They pronounced her dead at 1:44am.
He said she coded at 1:10. 3 minutes after he left the house to go to the hospital. So she didn't suffer, it was pretty damn fast. I helped him make calls to both sides of the family, gave lots of hugs, expressed my sympathy to his sons when he got there, shared hugs with their girlfriends. I took him home at around 3:00, stayed there cause he's just totally in shock. He kept pointing at his bypass scar and saying, "It was supposed to be me." More family started to show up so I left at around 7. So I could get my contacts out for a little bit so they didn't dry out my eyes. And maybe get a nap. I'm going back out there this afternoon.
Andrea was 43 years old. They had just celebrated their 26th wedding anniversary a couple of weeks ago. I've never been in that situation before, I've never been right next to someone when they were told a loved one was going to die. I tried to do the best I could but I don't feel like I did enough.
I got to the hospital and John told me that his wife, Andrea, seized and turned about 5 different shades of grey. He said she had been FINE all day. They made candy and watched a couple of movies. Then they were getting ready for bed and she remembered her phone was in her car. She's an on-call IT tech for her company, so she needs her phone. She never made it to the car, she went to the bathroom instead. She called to him suddenly and he went to see what was wrong because she sounded different. She said she thought she had passed out. Then she had a seizure. He called 911 and the paramedics got there within about 10 minutes. She was responsive, answering their questions, and they sent him to the hospital to check her in.
So we were sitting there and then at about 1:30 the nurse came out and said we should go wait in the Family room back in the ER. He's like a big brother to me, but since I am not blood family and his 2 sons were on their way, I said I'd wait in the lobby. about 2 minutes later, the nurse came back out and said, "Pumpkin, he's going to need you back there." My heart sank. I got back there and he said, "She's dead. Her heart stopped 20 minutes ago. They're doing CPR." I said they'd bring her around, they HAD to. Then the doctor came in and said they had her intubated and were doing everything they could but her heart wasn't responding and at that point he wasn't sure if she'd pull through. About 2 minutes later he came back. He asked John if he wanted to go back and say goodbye before he called it. So he did. They pronounced her dead at 1:44am.
He said she coded at 1:10. 3 minutes after he left the house to go to the hospital. So she didn't suffer, it was pretty damn fast. I helped him make calls to both sides of the family, gave lots of hugs, expressed my sympathy to his sons when he got there, shared hugs with their girlfriends. I took him home at around 3:00, stayed there cause he's just totally in shock. He kept pointing at his bypass scar and saying, "It was supposed to be me." More family started to show up so I left at around 7. So I could get my contacts out for a little bit so they didn't dry out my eyes. And maybe get a nap. I'm going back out there this afternoon.
Andrea was 43 years old. They had just celebrated their 26th wedding anniversary a couple of weeks ago. I've never been in that situation before, I've never been right next to someone when they were told a loved one was going to die. I tried to do the best I could but I don't feel like I did enough.
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