Queen Bee has no power over IT

[Crai]

At Merry old England base we had a US Post Office. The Postal clerks were the laziest lot I have ever seen. There was 3 of them to run a post office smaller than a studio apartment in NY. They worked from 8 to 11 and 1300 to 1530 (Yep only 5.5 hours a day) No weekends and never stood watch. (In case there was a postal emergency) The Queen Bee (QB for short) was a well entitled Blue Falcon. One day my Supervisor (same rank as her) we will call him Epic goes to pick up his mail. Now due to their two hour lunch Epic had to take time out of his work schedule to go pick up his mail. This was a common fight with QB over the working hours. Well Epic goes in gets his mail from the 2 drones and then walks out. QB comes running after him and demands he thank her and the drones for giving him his mail. He gives her the Whiskey Tango Foxtrot and demands to know why he should be so thankful for people that make his and everyone else’s life miserable by only working 5.5 hours a day and act like there giving you a kidney when you can get them to do any work.

Well he heads back to the Shop. By the time he had gotten back QB had called the number three of the Top Base Triad (Her BFF) The BFF called the Shop top dog who jumped Epic the moment he walked in the door. Epic told the Shop Top Dog to stay in his lane and that BFF can to, this was the AOR of the Junior Enlisted.

He turned to the 6 Network Admins sitting on the network floor and said “Destroy her”

So we did! First we photo shopped an image of a Unicorn with Rainbows and the word Thank You all over it. Then we made several Wave files with the word Thank You in different tones attributes. (Husky Thank you voice, Sweet, robotic, Sarcastic, ect) then we remoted in to Her computer. Set the photo as her back ground, Set the Wave files as default noises for all key strokes, mouse clicks, error beeps, ect, Then added a Fire Wall and Black hole to her system so she could not go to any web site that did not end in .mil or.gov (no more online shopping) Locked out all her user permissions so she could not change anything, set user time restrictions in place and did a few nastier things I won’t get into then rebooted.

Then we waited took a whole 10 Minutes and Epic answered the phone.

QB: WTF did you do to my Computer
Epic: Meeee? I haven’t done anything is there a problem.
QB: Nothing works and I don’t have any permissions and it keeps saying Thank You.
Epic: Can you get to email?
QB: Yes
Epic: Can you get to .mil and .gov site to work?
QB: Yes
Epic: Sounds like its working just fine .. oh and thank you :::Click:::

We let her stew for a week BFF tried to get involved but we just acted like we couldn’t figure out the problem. As it was a small command Top of the Triad found out had a laugh told us to fix it and told QB to be open 8 hours a day 5 days a week and 4 hours on Saturday.

[IT Grunt]

Never mess with those who have the power to mold your computer like so much silly putty.

[MoonCat]

So the postal people were setting their own hours? WTF?

[Crai]

The Postal people were all TAD (Temp Assigned Duty) Out of Naples. They technically did not belong to Base England. So they just did as they pleased.

[Akasa]

Oh that's epic!

[Dreamstalker]

Awesome. The type of revenge I can only dream of unleashing...

[Rosco the Iroc]

I was on CV-60 Saratoga's last cruise in '94. The ships electricians were going around and checking every single breaker on the boat. They show up to our shop that was shared with some less then stellar people from our F-14 sqdn VF-103. One of them was mad he had to stop playing on his computer so he could do his work and was a real dick to him.
I showed him around the shop so he could check stuff and offered to show me some of the load centers and back up generators. Ok cool
We go though some cool mech spaces in the engine rooms and shows me the load center that feeds that part of the shop.
He ask if I think he's back on his comp? Sure, he then proceeds to flip the breaker to the tune of the Mexican hat dance .
See how his comp likes that! Then leaves it off.
15 min later, he gets flagged down there's and outage.
yea-ok
We go back he turns is on, we go look at some other stuff for 10 min and go back and repeat.

[Jay 2K Winger]

For all that we're not supposed to approve of Retaliation Against The Suck, I have yet to read a Crai post that doesn't put a big g'damn smile on my face.

The schadenfreude is delicious.

[AccountingDrone]

15 min later, he gets flagged down there's and outage.
yea-ok
We go back he turns is on, we go look at some other stuff for 10 min and go back and repeat.

I know how to cut out the CO's private head's hot water recirc pump on a Sturgeon class fast attack submarine.

I disliked one of Rob's COs back when he was on a 637 I made dependent's cruises *interesting*

[Chromatix]

One of the lesser-known things about submarines is that every sailor on board is supposed to know how to operate every item of equipment he is permitted to access, at least at a basic level. Of course there are specialists who go beyond the basics in some particular compartment or station, but they too can find any major valve, hatch, switch in any part of the boat.

In practice there are always a few "new hands" who are still "learning the ropes" and are not yet "qualified" - you can recognise them by the lack of "dolphins" insignia. But they are always in the minority, and generally the most junior men on board.

Examples of out-of-bounds areas that the average sailor would not have intimate knowledge of include the machinery compartments of nuclear-powered boats, these generally comprising the entire back half of the vessel. Only nuclear-qualified personnel are meant to go there - I expect a guard is posted.

But I am not in the least surprised that the CO's shower is on the list of need-to-know equipment. It undoubtedly has its own circuit breaker on a panel among many others.

[AccountingDrone]

But I am not in the least surprised that the CO's shower is on the list of need-to-know equipment. It undoubtedly has its own circuit breaker on a panel among many others.

Actually the pump cut off switch is inside a panel inside a stowage locker in a passage one level under the main deck accessible from a machinery space....

Oddly enough, I have read and am competent in MM/Aux 3&2 mainly because it was laying around in the house and I got bored when I was bedridden post-operative back in 1995. AS a civilian inside/outside mechanic that also worked in the nuke field, I get along quite well with non-coner bubbleheads =) [my first husband was a nuke MM and Rob is a retired MM/Aux]