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I wouldn't DARE call him a Rent-A-Cop

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  • I wouldn't DARE call him a Rent-A-Cop

    So my older brother started working as a Security Specialist a few months back, but only really started getting work recently. He has a permenant weekend gig at a local grocery store, and he is also on call for dances and festivals.

    It's first job in years, and he takes to it like a fish to water. He has told me so many awesome stories from his job, I decided to share them with you all.

    I've got my eye on you
    So this story I got from my dad. He stopped by the grocery store to pick up some items when he bumped into my brother. Now my brother is supposed to be between the liquor store and the meat section, because that is where most of the shrinkage happens. However, my dad found my brother leaning on the wall outside of the main entrance. So dad walks up to him.

    Dad= I thought you were supposed to stay by the meat section.
    Bro= I just followed those kids out here. *Points to a group of 13 year old boys loitering in the parking lot*
    Boys= *shoots my brother dirty looks*
    Bro= *makes the "I'm watching you signal"*
    Boys= *runs out of the parking lot*
    Bro= *smirks and goes back inside*

    Don't Reveal his secret identity
    As I said before, my brother has a permenant security job at the local grocery store, but he is on call for other jobs. He has admitted a few times that he has been asked to do an all call shift that would run into his normal gig. Anyway, there is a Pirate festival currently going on in my hometown and my brother has been working the festival along with the grocery store job. He was on duty at the grocery store when someone who had seen him working the fesival walked by.

    Guy 1= Wow, you're everywhere.
    Bro= Yeah, I'm a Super Hero. *does a flying pose*
    Guy 2= So you're the Punisher?
    And everybody laughed.

    PIRATES!!!
    So my brother is working at the Pirate Festival. They had been firing canons all day as a display from the Tall Ships, so my brother had gotten pretty adjusted to the noise. Just as another round was being sounded a group of teens walks by my brother. The moment the canons went off, everyone jumped. My brother, used to the sound, didn't move a muscle.

    Girl with the teens= Didn't that scare you?
    Bro= After the first few times, it's kind of soothing.
    Pirate= *Walking by at just that moment, catching my brother's line* And THAT is what's stopping me from picking a fight with you!
    Bro= *takes of his security hat to reveal a long ponytail and a bandana* We might be on the same side.
    Pirate= Never can tell who might be.

    This just makes me smile
    So my brother was working at the Pirate Festival another day when someone brigns him a bottle of water. Later in the day, my brother is still on his post when the same guy come over to check if my brother is doing okay.
    Guy= Do you need anything?
    Bro= A man needs shade, a man needs a drink
    Bro and Guy in unison= And a man needs a name.

    My brother has many other stories about his security adventures, these are just the ones I enjoyed most. Maybe he will join the board and tell you some of the other ones.
    Last edited by hinakiba777; 08-01-2012, 03:46 AM.
    Hinakiba777- Student of Divinity-Always trying to get laid.

    Annoying student=I pay tuition here so I pay your salary!
    Desk Worker=I pay tuition here, too. So I guess I pay myself.

  • #2
    Sounds like he's gonna get along fine

    Is that quote from something particular? Google's not helping... Still cool though.
    This was one of those times where my mouth says "have a nice day" but my brain says "go step on a Lego". - RegisterAce
    I can't make something magically appear to fulfill all your hopes and dreams. Believe me, if I could I'd be the first person I'd help. - Trixie

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    • #3
      Quoth RealUnimportant View Post
      Is that quote from something particular? Google's not helping... Still cool though.
      It's Jaqen H'Ghar from Game of Thones or The Song of Ice and Fire. Whenever he speaks about himself he always refers to himself as "A man". So he says things like "A man repays his debts" and "A boy could help a man", etc.
      Hinakiba777- Student of Divinity-Always trying to get laid.

      Annoying student=I pay tuition here so I pay your salary!
      Desk Worker=I pay tuition here, too. So I guess I pay myself.

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      • #4
        Pirate festival? I'm suddenly feeling jealous.
        A lion however, will only devour your corpse, whereas an SC is not sated until they have destroyed your soul. (Quote per infinitemonkies)

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