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I'll pay you FIVE DOLLARS

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  • I'll pay you FIVE DOLLARS

    We have a sign on the door that says our washrooms are for customers only. We are very strict in enforcing it. The only exceptions we make are for children and mothers. The restaurant is in an area known for not having the cleanest of folks, so we have to be very diligent (there have been incedents in the past)

    A scruffy-looking man came in this afternoon and my co-worker greeted him at the door
    CW: Good afternoon! Table for one?
    SM: I need to use the washroom
    CW: I'm sorry, our washrooms are for customers only
    SM: I will pay you
    CW: I'm very sorry, but our rule is that it is for customers only
    SM: I WILL PAY YOU FIVE DOLLARS
    CW: I'm afraid I can't accept that. You have to make a purchase. Have a nice day. (moves him towards the door)
    SM: FIVE DOLLARS! I WILL PAY YOU FIVE DOLLARS!
    CW: Sir, you are going to have to leave
    SM: FINE! FINE! BUT I WANT EVERYONE IN HERE TO KNOW THAT OFFERED TO PAY YOU FIVE DOLLARS. FIVE DOLLARS!

    He left still shouting about five dollars and banged loudly on one of the windows as he walked away.
    Seriously, if you are willing to pay five dollars, why not just buy some food and become a customer?

  • #2
    Disturbed much? If he had five dollars why doesn't he just make a purchase?
    "Oh, by the way..." All of my HATE

    Ou kata nomon = Not according to the accepted norm

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    • #3
      At least he didn't go outside and pee in a bush, or on the side of the building! (Did he?)

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      • #4
        What, you couln't sell him a McDonalds coloring sheet with the mystery answer already revealed to be Hamburgler?

        (congrats if you get the reference)
        "Time shall help me face my painful memories with indifference, and with more of it, I won't feel the need to face them at all..."

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        • #5
          Actually, the answer was "Fries."

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          • #6
            really? i though it was "Creepy PedoClown"

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            • #7
              Quoth Record Store Tough Guy View Post
              Actually, the answer was "Fries."
              I bow to your knowledge, sir.
              "Time shall help me face my painful memories with indifference, and with more of it, I won't feel the need to face them at all..."

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              • #8
                I had one of those today:

                "Can I give you a dollar donation to the septic maintenance?"
                I let her.

                It's better than the barrage of:
                "well where do you go?"
                "what the hell's a septic system?"
                "how about I just pee right here on the floor?" etc, ad nauseum.


                My personal favorite though had me laughing at a customer as they left. Small family group, all adults, and they're using the restroom and buying snacks. I don't remember if I gave them the septic system/customers only speech or not but as one of the girls was leaving she was making a passive aggressive comment to the other girl that was meant for me to hear. She was probably early 20's, if that.

                "In this day and age of modern plumbing why would anyone still be on a septic system????!!!??? "

                She wasn't quite out the door when I started laughing. The dad looked at me and I told him, "Tell her I said thanks for the laugh"
                Hopefully the dad explained it to her.

                "You'd feel a Hell of a lot better if you'd just rip into the occasional customer."
                ~Clerks

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                • #9
                  Quoth SuperB
                  "In this day and age of modern plumbing why would anyone still be on a septic system????!!!??? "

                  She wasn't quite out the door when I started laughing. The dad looked at me and I told him, "Tell her I said thanks for the laugh"
                  Hopefully the dad explained it to her.
                  If the father laughed that hard they were probably on septic systems at their house. I don't why people think septic systems are bad nowadays. they keep your lawn green during drought season, which is why i wish i had one.
                  Last edited by Broomjockey; 03-29-2008, 03:26 AM. Reason: fix'd quot' tags

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                  • #10
                    Quoth Happy Otter Lover View Post
                    We are very strict in enforcing it. The only exceptions we make are for children and mothers.
                    I understand children, but why make an exception for mothers but not fathers?

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                    • #11
                      Quoth trunks2k View Post
                      I understand children, but why make an exception for mothers but not fathers?
                      She may have meant pregnant women.
                      The universe is mostly empty space, and so is your job. ~Dilbert

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                      • #12
                        Quoth Cyphr View Post
                        If the father laughed that hard they were probably on septic systems at their house. I don't why people think septic systems are bad nowadays. they keep your lawn green during drought season, which is why i wish i had one.
                        They're also necessary. No sewers in the mountains.

                        "You'd feel a Hell of a lot better if you'd just rip into the occasional customer."
                        ~Clerks

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                        • #13
                          Quoth trunks2k View Post
                          I understand children, but why make an exception for mothers but not fathers?
                          I would make an exception for fathers too, of course. I personally haven't had any fathers come in with children and ask, but I would certainly not turn them away if they did.

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                          • #14
                            I have F****** McD's just about across the street from me. They gotta pass several other similar type places. I am a warehouse type store. Not a normal place to go visit unless you actually want my products.

                            At least once per week there is somebody in the showroom area wanting to use the restroom.

                            If we can see the P is welling up in their eyes we direct them to the restrooms. Otherwise life is a witch. Actually I not totally heartless. I let most of them go. But why visit me when McD's figuratively has a flashing neon sign that says free restrooms?
                            SC Motto "I am more important than you and others and don't you ever forget it"

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                            • #15
                              Quoth StevieJ
                              But why visit me when McD's figuratively has a flashing neon sign that says free restrooms?
                              that reminds me, a fast food joint in the nightclub district took down their "restrooms for customers only" signs because everybody ignored them anyway.
                              Last edited by edible_hat; 03-29-2008, 12:00 AM.

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