I had a customer who redefined crazy for me (okay, I've had much much worse, but this guy caught me off guard).
I must make a confession to you all... I did not know it myself until recently, but I am a communist. I know, I know, I was shocked too... I know I wasn't raised to be a communist, but apparently its insidious grasp got me anyway.
Me:
SC: Crazy conspiracy guy
Me: Hi, how can I help you?
SC: I'll have pyramid red 100s.
Me: I'm sorry, we are out of the 100s in red, would you like the regulars instead?
SC: No, I want my 100s... what is it with this place? You know what this store reminds me of?
Me: Uh.....
SC: This store is just like taking a time machine back to the 80s and visiting Moscow.
Me:
SC: You must be run by communists, only communists could have this many empty shelves all the time, that is the inefficiency of communism.
Me: *looks around the store to see that literally the only things we are out of is eggs, one flavor of ice cream that we were having a sale on and we expected we would probably run out of due to a lack of room to store back stock, and his precious pyramid red 100s*
SC: Aren't you going to try to deny it?
Me: What?
SC: You're a communist too, aren't you? That's why you work here! You filthy communist, go back to Russian where you belong and take this disgrace of a store with you!
Me: I'm sorry sir, but we have no control over the cigarettes, we sell them on consignment, pyramid is responsible for keeping track of their stock with us and making sure we receive their product (this is actually about 3/4 true... we don't sell on consignment, but we do use a 3rd party vendor who managers our cigarette inventory rather than doing it in house, so we don't have any direct control over how much we receive, but saying its on consignment is easier).
SC: Whatever lies help you sleep at night you dirty communist.
SC: *storms off*
Me: Have a nice day sir.
SC: *comes back to desk angry*
SC: On second thought, I'll take the damned regular pyramid reds, better communists than those damned Indians at their smoke shop.
Me: *doing a good job of hiding * Yes sir, right away sir.
Seriously, apparently I'm a communist because I work for a company that runs out of three things... oh, and apparently our shelves are always empty, which is a surprise to me considering how much time I spend stocking.
I must make a confession to you all... I did not know it myself until recently, but I am a communist. I know, I know, I was shocked too... I know I wasn't raised to be a communist, but apparently its insidious grasp got me anyway.
Me:
SC: Crazy conspiracy guy
Me: Hi, how can I help you?
SC: I'll have pyramid red 100s.
Me: I'm sorry, we are out of the 100s in red, would you like the regulars instead?
SC: No, I want my 100s... what is it with this place? You know what this store reminds me of?
Me: Uh.....
SC: This store is just like taking a time machine back to the 80s and visiting Moscow.
Me:
SC: You must be run by communists, only communists could have this many empty shelves all the time, that is the inefficiency of communism.
Me: *looks around the store to see that literally the only things we are out of is eggs, one flavor of ice cream that we were having a sale on and we expected we would probably run out of due to a lack of room to store back stock, and his precious pyramid red 100s*
SC: Aren't you going to try to deny it?
Me: What?
SC: You're a communist too, aren't you? That's why you work here! You filthy communist, go back to Russian where you belong and take this disgrace of a store with you!
Me: I'm sorry sir, but we have no control over the cigarettes, we sell them on consignment, pyramid is responsible for keeping track of their stock with us and making sure we receive their product (this is actually about 3/4 true... we don't sell on consignment, but we do use a 3rd party vendor who managers our cigarette inventory rather than doing it in house, so we don't have any direct control over how much we receive, but saying its on consignment is easier).
SC: Whatever lies help you sleep at night you dirty communist.
SC: *storms off*
Me: Have a nice day sir.
SC: *comes back to desk angry*
SC: On second thought, I'll take the damned regular pyramid reds, better communists than those damned Indians at their smoke shop.
Me: *doing a good job of hiding * Yes sir, right away sir.
Seriously, apparently I'm a communist because I work for a company that runs out of three things... oh, and apparently our shelves are always empty, which is a surprise to me considering how much time I spend stocking.
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