Gratuitous Violence and the change of ownership for all your places of operations...

[Sliceanddice]

Don't mind if I do

sweetie when you go insane and kill everyone... can i watch

[draggar]

SM: Hold on, I need to axe my mom.

I'm tired of the ebonics thng. No, you cannot axe me anything, you can ASK me a question.

And don't get me started on "What it does".

SW: I need a new phone, very badly. The old one doesn't do what I need it to do.
ME: I'm truly sorry to hear that. What's the problem with the phone?
SW: It doesn't vibrate.
ME: That's unfortunate. Does it show a call is coming in, does it play the ringtone if you have the sound on?
SW: Yes, everything else works fine, but it doesn't vibrate anymore.
ME: Well, I'd be happy to go over some troubleshooting with you, see if we can get it working again.
SW: I hope so. I need it to vibrate again.

Uh, I'm not going to ask any questions, but I'm fairly certain you've voided your warranty. You know, there are, uh, other products, on the market that are more... specifically designed to, uh, do what it is that you require.

Was it an Audiovox 9100 or 9155? Those were shaped rather, um, interestingly AND had a powerful vibrator..

Actually, it's Bob.

This week, next week it could be..... You might work for the same company as me (but I'm thinking you're working for the other one based in a Park in KS), so our presidents and VPs are changing weekly.

[Kara]

Was it an Audiovox 9100 or 9155? Those were shaped rather, um, interestingly AND had a powerful vibrator..

Nah, it was a Nokia 6103.

(but I'm thinking you're working for the other one based in a Park in KS)

Close, Grasshopper. Very close. Right company, wrong location. I'm at the place with all the airplanes.

sweetie when you go insane and kill everyone... can i watch

I'm fairly certain it will be all over the TV. Heck, everyone will probably get sick of my spree of destruction and look for reruns of Sanford & Son.

[Becks]

ISW: I need a new phone, very badly. The old one doesn't do what I need it to do.
ME: I'm truly sorry to hear that. What's the problem with the phone?
SW: It doesn't vibrate.
ME: That's unfortunate. Does it show a call is coming in, does it play the ringtone if you have the sound on?
SW: Yes, everything else works fine, but it doesn't vibrate anymore.
ME: Well, I'd be happy to go over some troubleshooting with you, see if we can get it working again.
SW: I hope so. I need it to vibrate again.

Uh, I'm not going to ask any questions, but I'm fairly certain you've voided your warranty. You know, there are, uh, other products, on the market that are more... specifically designed to, uh, do what it is that you require.

I want a new phone, for other reasons, but... If the vibrate feature went out on my phone I would be upset. I use it because every single one of my ringtones SUCK. Otherwise I wouldn't have my phone set to vibrate.

[Gurndigarn]

And don't get me started on "What it does".

Don't you mean "What it do"?

[Andara Bledin]

Do I sound like I'm laughing?

ME: Can I just have the customer's mobile phone number?
DLR: No.
ME: ...
DLR: Just kidding.
ME: ...
DLR: Hahaha.
ME: ...
DLR: Hello?

Yeah, I'm still here. I'm just looking up your store address so I know where to call in the air strike.

See, after the second or third time some joker tried to pull that on me, I stopped asking the questions like that. If I were in your position, I would ask, "What is the customer's mobile number." No chance for laughing boy to exercise his mushy wit, and it's a shorter phrase, too.

Not a recommended use for your phone

Uh, I'm not going to ask any questions, but I'm fairly certain you've voided your warranty. You know, there are, uh, other products, on the market that are more... specifically designed to, uh, do what it is that you require.

I need my phone to vibrate, too. I don't like having a loud ringtone because I think it's obnoxious when I hear other people's cell phones, and believe it's just as obnoxious when the phone happens to be mine. Unfortunately, the Razr I have now has the weakest vibrate mode. It's pathetic. I keep my phone in my back pocket, and I can hear the ring in a noisy office, but I can't even feel the vibration.

You really think the head of a multi-billion dollar organization would be named Ralph?

Heh. My company is small potatoes, but the boss is named Bob.

^-.-^

[cloudiko]

ME: Your phone is still under warranty, and we can exchange it for you at no cost.
SW: Why would I want the same phone if it's not having good justice?

What the hell?!?!? Acutally, ?!? Since when did inanimate objects have a sense of justice?

[Starlord]

When I was on the job, I loved it when someone would say someone aked them something. I would drop my clipboard and pen, reach for my sidearm, and ask, real panicky sounding, "Who has an axe?" How can anyone mispronounce a three-letter, one-syllable word? Another one is the "someone hanged the phone up in my face." Funny, I get it in the ear when someone hangs up. I love watching the court shows. Some of those people have me rolling on the floor.