Trust when dealing with people on Craigslist

[LillFilly]

I recently sold some items. I always arrange to meet people in a public place; store lot, gas station, etc. This last time, the items were really popular; lots of calls, but no purchase. A lady finally wanted to see then right away and asked if I could come over as she was new to the area and didn't know any of the places I was describing to meet. I was wary; could it be a ploy? She gave me her address; I saw that as a sign of trust and the address was only 5-minutes away. But, the address was also for a bad part of town on a street that is seen often in police reports. Now I'm torn; I hear kids in the background and figure she just can't bundle up all the kids and go out to meet me, and she seems kind of flustered. So I took the chance. I only took my license and car key and parked my car several houses away. I debated about this, but also concealed my handgun and had my carry permit; this is where I felt weird. I FELT like a criminal, and figured I was being paranoid, but this is why I took training and did research - so I could protect myself. I called her before I got to the door to let her know I was there, hoping we could meet on the porch, but she invited me in and it was dark and cold out.

And it was all ok. She had 4 kids who LOVED what I had listed and wanted all of them. They had just moved there that week and she honestly didn't know their way around. She was still waiting for the furniture to come even! The husband/boyfriend looked like tough guy, but was really friendly. So I felt SOOOO guilty afterwards know I had a gun when she was the nicest lady in the world and kids were adorable! But she took a risk too, inviting someone off the internet into her home with her kids. Geeze, who knew Craigslist would take such a psychological toll? I feel weird about it, and sad that I couldn't trust more.

[crazylegs]

Geeze, who knew Craigslist would take such a psychological toll? I feel weird about it, and sad that I couldn't trust more.

I don't order anything off ebay (or similar) because of the amount of fraud reports I saw in my previous job. I just can't shake it no matter how many people tell me it's ace so I know how you feel

[NecessaryCatharsis]

I feel weird about it, and sad that I couldn't trust more.

It happens, and I don't think you were silly to take the precautions you took, although I think
1) Going into a situation afraid can make you over-react to any perceived threat, and you could unintentionally make a normal situation bad and
2) There are probably more effective precautions that you could have taken.

Bringing a friend, even one who wants to stay in car, is better than going anywhere alone. If people know there is someone who is going to know where you were, and who you were with, they are far less likely to cause trouble.

There was a man near here who was selling his truck on kijiji (same type of website), who met up with two men to show them the truck, and they killed him. It isn't clear if they met up with him intending to kill him, or if they tried to steal the truck and failed or what, but it is clear that it isn't always safe to meet up with strangers you meet on the internet.

There is also millions and millions of unreported stories about people who meet up and successfully buy/sell an item and nothing bad happens at all. I've had people to my house to purchase large items and the only precautions I take are to ship the kid off to a sitters and to have a large angry looking friend hanging out and drinking a beer when the buyers show up. (You would be amazed how many people are willing to help when the requirements are, you want to come over to my place, drink my beer for a couple hours then go home?)

[Pixilated]

Easy for me to say, but I don't think you should feel guilty over the steps you took to protect yourself. It's not like you kicked in the front door, waved the gun at them, and yelled, "OK NOW WHICH OF YOU ANSWERED MY CRAIGSLIST AD?!?"

You said yourself it's a bad part of town. And it's hardly unusual for criminals to use a helpless-sounding female as bait. So yeah, I think you did the best thing possible, and I'm glad it all worked out.

When I sold stuff on Kijiji (a Canadian site similar to Craigslist) I always used to meet people in my apartment lobby. Mostly what I've sold lately are textbooks, so I just meet the buyers at the college. But I've posted other non-school items -- haven't had any inquiries, but if I do, I'll meet them at the nearest mall or Timmie's or something. Definitely not gonna let people I don't know into the house.

I also think the idea of taking along a buddy is a great one.