Dumbest question you have ever been asked

[Record Store Tough Guy]

Some will argue that there are no stupid questions, only stupid answers. I think whoever said that has never worked in retail. So, what's the dumbest question you've ever been asked?

For example:

A woman came in the store looking for Ice T. I showed her the section, but alas, we were out of this particular artist.

"It looks like we're out of him at the moment."

"Oh. Well do you know which one it is?"

Perplexed, I ask her to clarify. "Do I know which one what is?"

She looks at me, and in a tone usually reserved for small children and dogs, says "Do you know which one it is you are out of?"

I look at her and, in a tone of voice usually reserved for dullards and lackwits, answer "That would be all of them, it would seem."

[Chanlin]

I'm sure there are plenty other thread like this but why not

In reference to a cellular phone, and mite I add this was asked in that disbelieving tone:

"You mean I have to turn it on to receive calls?"

[edible_hat]

"You look like you don't need to know, but do you know where there's a brothel around here?"

(he was right, I didn't need to know )

[digilight]

Let me preface this by saying that my shop was previously in a building that was very close to alot of local government (city and county) office buildings. We had the grandjury and probation located in the building right next door to us. Drug and Alcohol school (DUI Diversion Program) Was located 2 buildings down from us, etc.

One day this paint huffing speciman of class walks thru our door ...errr slightly stumbles and asks us while sluring his speach every sow slightly if we new where the drug and alcohol school was. We told him and he left to go on his merry way. It took another couple of minutes for the cloud of booze smell to leave the room.

Now you may be asking yourself why is this the dumbest question that you have ever been asked. Well let me tell you, I also had a client at the counter as well. A client who has been an attorney for about 30 years and has served as booth a judge pro-temp as well as a judicial mediator. He began to tell me that one of the conditions for being able to recieve the Diversion program (it is probation, AA/NA, and the Drug and Alcohol classes) is that you must also stay sober 24/7 not even a drink, you cannot drive while you in the program (as your license has been suspended), etc, etc. He basically told me that this assclown would immediatly have his probation revoked and his ass thrown in jail. He wouldn't see his own bed at home for quite some time.

[BookstoreEscapee]

I think the dumbest is "Do you work here?" while I was standing INSIDE the customer service desk, or BEHIND the register (both of which I have gotten).

[AnaKhouri]

"Can you tell me about your books and DVDs?"

What...all 50,000 of them?

The worst part is, this person was serious!

[bainsidhe]

Dumbest question you have ever been asked

One I get all the time is:

"Do you know what time Target closes"? (for the record, we are about a mile away and Target is located in the same block as the shopping mall)

"Um, no, sorry I don't" After all, all large department stores keep tabs on others, right?

"Don't you close at the same time?" Usually said with a hint of disgust at my ignorance.

"We're open 24/7"

"Oh"

[Plaidman]

It was more yelled then asked, but I was more or less asked why I couldn't sell cigs to a 10 year old.

[South Texan]

"Are you CLOSED????"

Gee. The sign in the parking lot was turned off. The clearly posted hours on the front door show a closing time of over thirty minutes ago. The work lights in the dining room are on and the atmosphere lights are off. The nice dinner music is off and loud rock is blaring from the speakers. No one was at the hostess stand. The chairs are up on the tables while the bus staff are vacuuming. No other customers are in the restaurant. The wait staff have taken off their ties and are tearing down the salad bar or restocking the tables. The chef is sitting at the bar having a beer.

How did you guess?

[Bright_Star]

"what time do you close"? Asked at Wal-Mart where it's open 24/7.

[Mango]

Do I really have to pay for the item before you'll ship it? I can't send a cheque after it arrives?

Well, I've never heard of such a thing!

[K'Z'K]

On a whale watch: "What do the whales do when it rains?"

-K'Z'K

[Slayergrrl]

I work for the police dept...

" Umm, I was arrested last night. They gave me back everything except for my weed! When can I get that back?"

[Imogene]

Note: I worked in a movie store/knick knack outlet... (depended mostly on the time of year. We always had movies, but would get lots of kitschy stuff around Halloween, right on through to Christmas):
"Do you sell furniture here?"
While I was in the back of the store, and it's not like the place was huge, and the guy'd just walked through the entirety of the store.
"Did you see a sectional?"

[Alpha Strike]

Me: "Well Ma'am, your account is with Company X and we're Company Y."

SC: "Why can't you help me with this?! I'm tired of making phone calls!"