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Sighting at Starbucks: Butt cheeks

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  • Sighting at Starbucks: Butt cheeks

    Yup, I saw butt cheeks at Starbucks a couple of weekends ago. I was out running some errands and popped in for a tasty beverage. I found myself in line behind a young couple, late teens to early twenties. She was wearing a black tank top, a bikini, and flip flops. No pants. And if that wasn't bad enough, her bikini bottoms were of the ambitious, musical loving sort that yearned to "climb every mountain." So, yeah, just hangin' out at Starbucks...

    When it was my turn at the counter, I said to the barista, "Yeah, shirt and shoes are required, but pants are optional." She gave a kind of half smile and weak laugh, but it was hard to tell if it was the "I agree with you that the situation is screwed up, but I am powerless to stop it," or the "I'm not sure what you're talking about, but I can tell you're trying to make a joke, so here's a fake laugh to humor you" variety.

    Seriously, how do you not notice that

    1. you aren't wearing pants in public, and
    2. your butt cheeks are flapping in the breeze?
    "Redheads have at least a 95% chance of being gorgeous. They're also concentrated evil." - Irv

    "This is all strange, uncharted territory and your hamster only has three legs." - Gravekeeper

  • #2
    My cynical guess is that she knew both very well, and was just waiting for somebody to make a comment so she could scream in righteous outrage that (1) buttcheeks are NATURAL, or (2) people should treat her like some kind of SEX SYMBOL, dammit!

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    • #3
      Quoth Pixilated View Post
      (2) people should treat her like some kind of SEX SYMBOL, dammit!
      And if any guys do treat her like some kind of SEX SYMBOL, it's "OMG HDU YOU DIRTY PERVERT."
      Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. Study hard. Be evil.

      "I never said I wasn't a horrible person."--Me, almost daily

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      • #4
        This is the same question I always ask when I am unfortunate enough to be behind someone wearing saggy pants and either no undies, or saggy undies. Seriously, dude (or girl), how can you NOT feel the breeze on your butt??
        When you start at zero, everything's progress.

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        • #5
          So two lumps with your tea, yes?
          To right the countless wrongs of our days... We shine this light of true redemption, that this place may become as paradise...Oh, what a wonderful world such would be...

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          • #6
            I will only make a reference to the People of Wal-Mart. Bill Mahr did a rant on his last Real Time show. SOme of the pictures he showed from that website make the person the OP described sound tame.
            I'm lost without a paddle and headed up SH*T creek.
            -- Life Sucks Then You Die.


            "I'll believe corp. are people when Texas executes one."

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