Let's Kill Jester!

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

I like the way he thinks, but you and I both know that depriving me of alcohol won't kill me at all. Not even close. Remember, I'm a drunk, not an alcoholic. Big difference.

You can have only 10 Cane rum and Wild Turkey to drink.

You'll be welcoming death.

[cindybubbles]

Try every method listed in the Darwin Awards website, and stop when it works.

You won't win a Darwin Award, though. That's only for people who do it by accident, not on purpose.

PM me if you want to know the URL. I don't think the Site Rules allow me to post the URL publicly anyway, but just in case, I'm not taking any chances.

[Jester]

A magic trick gone awry transports you into a vat of rum, where a bittersweet drowning awaits you. (So much for real world, but I had to . ).

Actually, real world magic tricks exist that could do something comparable. And mishaps can and do happen. Of course, I can't say more on the subject.

Yeah, alcoholics go to meetings.

There are other differences, of course, but you have the basic idea.

You can have only 10 Cane rum and Wild Turkey to drink.

You'll be welcoming death.

Right idea, wrong items. The old formula 10 Cane was turpentine, but the new formula isn't too bad. And Wild Turkey? Not so horrible.

If you really wanted me to wish for death, I'd be limited to Heineken, Barcelo Imperial rum, Jim Beam bourbon, Dynamite Cabernet, any kind of gin ever, any diet soda ever, tonic, Moutain Dew, Powerade, various cheapass rums, Coors Light, and Fat Tire beer.

Blech.

[Barracuda]

Personally, I think he falls into a brewing vat of his favorite beer and drowns while touring a brewery.

[darkroxas45]

Personally, I think he falls into a brewing vat of his favorite beer and drowns while touring a brewery.

If it's his favorite beer, does that make it suicide?

[Kazim]

Jester chokes on the best (and last) beer he has, appropiedly name "Last Call" :P

[Kittish]

You won't win a Darwin Award, though. That's only for people who do it by accident, not on purpose.

Not true. Darwin Awards are for people who die doing mind-bogglingly stupid things, often with plenty of forethought. Pure actual accidents are not eligible for Darwins.

[Jester]

Just a reminder....you can "kill" others in here in creative ways, if you wish to.

Unless y'all would just rather focus your energies on my demise. Which to some people would make sense, actually......

[darkroxas45]

Seraph killed by headbanging her computer after the 5 billionth person asked for free stuff. I'll even make this 2-for1 with my own demise playing too much Jet Set Radio Future.

[Argabarga]

Argabarga was just torn away by a herd of wild horses... turns out they really COULD do that.

[mathnerd]

Argabarga was just torn away by a herd of wild horses... turns out they really COULD do that.

Nah, I think you'll meet your demise by playing one to many practical jokes on Twitch.

[cindybubbles]

Not true. Darwin Awards are for people who die doing mind-bogglingly stupid things, often with plenty of forethought. Pure actual accidents are not eligible for Darwins.

Ah, but neither is actually trying to win a Darwin Award. They want to discourage you from doing stupid stuff, not encourage you!

[Jester]

Argabarga was just torn away by a herd of wild horses... turns out they really COULD do that.

As a fan of both the band and the song, I like that one. Well played, sir. Well played indeed.

[darkroxas45]

If I volunteer for too much my death might be overrun by little kids and deafened then killed by something I didn't hear.

[Sliceanddice]

my death is easy to predict, ill either fall and break my neck or meimei will snap and poison me.