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I just finished up a nearly 3-week stint at [hospital site].
Second-to-last day there I found myself all by my lonesome because the site manager was on vacation (I was officially covering for him), the assistant manager was at an appointment getting her injured knee looked at, one of the techs had quit and was yet to be replaced, and the other two were off attending to the many tickets we had to deal with.
Enter Johnny Moronic from the medical records department. He handed me a form and asked for "a million of them."
Ok.......a million copies would require 200 cases of paper, or five pallets worth, and over 100 hours of continuous copier operation....something tells me you really want a bit less than that.
He clarified that he wanted 600. That's a much more reasonable number. When informed that would only take about 5 minutes he opted to wait. In the meantime I had him fill out a req form for the copy job. For "department" he wrote "TOS."
Now, I already knew he was from Medical Records because it was an internal form that only the MR department uses that he wanted copies of. There are also a couple of different sub-departments within medical records, but I hadn't heard of "TOS."
He said it meant "top of stairs." I'm really glad I caught this error, because without any context there would've been no way to know who to charge this to later. What he SHOULD have written was "HIM Audit."
After they printed I noted the job completion time and handed him the 600 copies.
"Can I get another 600?" he asked.
"Um....sure." I reply. I put the original back on the scanner and started another 600.
I had scarcely crossed out "600" on the copy req and wrote in "1200" when he said "and another 600 after that."
"Alright," I asked, scribbling out the "1200," "How many are you looking for in total?"
"Enough to fill this box," said Johnny Moronic, holding up an empty case of paper.
"That would be 5000." I told him.
"OK!" said Johnny cheerfully. I reset the copy quantity to reflect a grand total of 5000. Then I informed him that it would take at least 30 minutes to complete and that I would call him when it was finished.
"OK!" and he wandered off.
About that time the assistant manager came back. I was in the middle of filling her in on what she'd missed when JM came wandering back in!
"How's it going? Are they ready?"
Dude, seriously? I just told you it would take 30 minutes! It's barely been 5! Hell, I know how long it takes to walk from the copy center to medical records, so I know pretty much for a fact that you couldn't have waited for more than 90 seconds upon returning to your department. I bet you wandered into the bathroom across the hall from Medical Records to take a leak then came straight back.
I also said I would CALL YOU when they were done! And I KNOW you didn't get a call from us.
"That's ok; I like hanging out here."
What?? No, no you don't. Watching copies come out of the machine is only a few steps above watching paint dry. Moreover you can't just come down here to hang out. It's a small copy center and we are constantly moving in and out to attend to our various duties around the hospital complex. You are in the way, and you are annoying us; it's like you just walked into some random person's office and sat down.
Finally, the 5000 copies finished.
"Can I get a second box of them?" He asked....ie, another 5000.
The assistant manager said yes, but that that was it for the day because we have other copy jobs to do and he can't keep our machine tied up all day (a white lie on her part, but I'd already told her about his magically inflating job total and with her knee killing her she wasn't in the mood for games). She also explicitly told him that it would take another 30-40 minutes and not to come back until we called him.
10 minutes later, guess who came back?
"OKIhavetodeliveratonerto5centralbye!" I said and hurried out the door.
AssMan:
Second-to-last day there I found myself all by my lonesome because the site manager was on vacation (I was officially covering for him), the assistant manager was at an appointment getting her injured knee looked at, one of the techs had quit and was yet to be replaced, and the other two were off attending to the many tickets we had to deal with.
Enter Johnny Moronic from the medical records department. He handed me a form and asked for "a million of them."
Ok.......a million copies would require 200 cases of paper, or five pallets worth, and over 100 hours of continuous copier operation....something tells me you really want a bit less than that.
He clarified that he wanted 600. That's a much more reasonable number. When informed that would only take about 5 minutes he opted to wait. In the meantime I had him fill out a req form for the copy job. For "department" he wrote "TOS."
Now, I already knew he was from Medical Records because it was an internal form that only the MR department uses that he wanted copies of. There are also a couple of different sub-departments within medical records, but I hadn't heard of "TOS."
He said it meant "top of stairs." I'm really glad I caught this error, because without any context there would've been no way to know who to charge this to later. What he SHOULD have written was "HIM Audit."
After they printed I noted the job completion time and handed him the 600 copies.
"Can I get another 600?" he asked.
"Um....sure." I reply. I put the original back on the scanner and started another 600.
I had scarcely crossed out "600" on the copy req and wrote in "1200" when he said "and another 600 after that."
"Alright," I asked, scribbling out the "1200," "How many are you looking for in total?"
"Enough to fill this box," said Johnny Moronic, holding up an empty case of paper.
"That would be 5000." I told him.
"OK!" said Johnny cheerfully. I reset the copy quantity to reflect a grand total of 5000. Then I informed him that it would take at least 30 minutes to complete and that I would call him when it was finished.
"OK!" and he wandered off.
About that time the assistant manager came back. I was in the middle of filling her in on what she'd missed when JM came wandering back in!
"How's it going? Are they ready?"
Dude, seriously? I just told you it would take 30 minutes! It's barely been 5! Hell, I know how long it takes to walk from the copy center to medical records, so I know pretty much for a fact that you couldn't have waited for more than 90 seconds upon returning to your department. I bet you wandered into the bathroom across the hall from Medical Records to take a leak then came straight back.
I also said I would CALL YOU when they were done! And I KNOW you didn't get a call from us.
"That's ok; I like hanging out here."
What?? No, no you don't. Watching copies come out of the machine is only a few steps above watching paint dry. Moreover you can't just come down here to hang out. It's a small copy center and we are constantly moving in and out to attend to our various duties around the hospital complex. You are in the way, and you are annoying us; it's like you just walked into some random person's office and sat down.
Finally, the 5000 copies finished.
"Can I get a second box of them?" He asked....ie, another 5000.
The assistant manager said yes, but that that was it for the day because we have other copy jobs to do and he can't keep our machine tied up all day (a white lie on her part, but I'd already told her about his magically inflating job total and with her knee killing her she wasn't in the mood for games). She also explicitly told him that it would take another 30-40 minutes and not to come back until we called him.
10 minutes later, guess who came back?
"OKIhavetodeliveratonerto5centralbye!" I said and hurried out the door.
AssMan:
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