Haven't you people ever heard of closing your goddamn door? Part deux

[mathnerd]

And now I've got Panic! at the Disco's "I Write Sins, not Tragedies" in my head, thanks to the title.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vc6vs-l5dkc

Only the version my kids have on their playlists don't bleep out the "bad" word.

[WishfulSpirit]

My door stay closed. For some reason my husband has decided whenever I'm taking a crap is the perfect time to show me something stupid on his facebook feed or explain his newest tin-foil-hat theory (they aren't really that farfetched, he just needs to work on source citation a bit more and jumping to conclusions a bit less). I DO NOT want to talk while I am doing something gross, thanks. I'm gonna start locking that damn door.

[raudf]

The president of the US gets more privacy in the bathroom than I do at home. If it's not the toddler following me around, it's the cat and if it's not either of them, it's my husband who is sure I fell into the toilet or something.

In public? Door stays closed. It's the only time I get to pee in peace!

[VComps]

No, it's MUCH better to face these kinds of things with a sense of poise and rationality.

Slightly off-topic note: I love the word play of that line; it can be heard two ways: "a sense of poise and rationality" or "a sense of poisoned rationality."

And now, back to your regularly scheduled sucky customers.

[Lovecats]

In my case it would be my youngest daughter's little fingers under the door and a plaintive cry of "Mom, whatcha doin' in there?"
Now that it's just my husband and me (both kids are married) I only close the door when he's home. Otherwise, if it's just me it's open.

[notalwaysright]

This just reminded me of a scene on 30 Rock where Tracy Jordan's wife found out that he rents a hotel room two nights a week. She assumes he's cheating, right? But he actually uses it so he can poop in peace. And he finishes with "I don't know why I only go twice a week. That's what Angie should be worried about!"

[WishfulSpirit]

Hubby also invades the tub or shower when I'm using either one. GO AWAY I don't want to bathe with you! I already have sex with you! Sheesh.

[protege]

Especially at 5 in the morning when I'm just getting up to get ready for work. Especially if I don't have at least 2 on the bed already waiting for me to get up so they can get fed.

....and that's why my bedroom door has a deadbolt on it. Seriously. The door doesn't latch, and Baxter knows if he leans on it, instant entry. I love the kittehs, but not at 3AM crawling all over me and biting my ears

[Chromatix]

I can't believe IPF missed the opportunity to say: "Part deuce".

[DGoddessChardonnay]

....and that's why my bedroom door has a deadbolt on it. Seriously. The door doesn't latch, and Baxter knows if he leans on it, instant entry. I love the kittehs, but not at 3AM crawling all over me and biting my ears

I'll swap you Pasquinel diving under the covers and sticking a claw into my butt.

If that doesn't wake you up, NOTHING WILL!

[Aria]

When I was young, I passed by a horror movie with a cover picture of a horrible goblin monster coming out of a toilet. For several years, I didn't want to go pee in the dark OR lock the door of a public bathroom. Don't ask me why the second made sense.

But I grew out of it like a normal person. What's their excuse?

[Ironclad Alibi]

When I was young, I passed by a horror movie with a cover picture of a horrible goblin monster coming out of a toilet. For several years, I didn't want to go pee in the dark OR lock the door of a public bathroom. Don't ask me why the second made sense.

But I grew out of it like a normal person. What's their excuse?

That couldn't have been worse than the monster that came out of the toilet in Dogma.

[AH85]

When I was young, I passed by a horror movie with a cover picture of a horrible goblin monster coming out of a toilet. For several years, I didn't want to go pee in the dark OR lock the door of a public bathroom. Don't ask me why the second made sense.

But I grew out of it like a normal person. What's their excuse?

"Ghoulies"? hated that movie poster too - it creeped me out as a kid!

[CKoch]

I once worked in radio, an industry with more than its fair share of weirdos. There was one DJ working morning drive, also the program director, who made it a habit of using the ladies room instead of the men's room (these are single stall, single sink affairs -- basically a bathroom with a sign on the outside). Then one morning, he decides to use the ladies room with the door wide open. I go to use the can, and as I approach, there is he is making believe he's hurrying to put his junk back into his pants. Oh, and yeah, he said "hi." I nearly barfed in disgust.

This is the same guy who would sit behind his desk with his pants down and try to get female employees to come around to his side of his desk.

Sad part is, this was all in the days before laws prohibiting sexual harassment, so he got away with it. Female employees never lasted very long at that place. If they complained to the station manager, this guy would have them fired.