Dear Mr. Tow Truck Driver...

[Ben_Who]

Prologue:

"Wow, this apartment is awesome. Look at the SIZE of it. Does it come with two off-street parking spaces?"
"No, sorry. Only one."
"Hm...That's tough. We've got two cars. I love the place, but this could be a deal-breaker."
"Well, we rent garage space on Pierson, about a hundred feet away, for fifty dollars a month."
"A whole garage? All to myself? For fifty bucks a month? Well, let's go see it!"
We go see it.
"Holy crap, this garage is a CAVE! You could play tennis in here! Fifty a month, you say? We'll take it!"

Act 1:

Roommate comes home, looking annoyed.
"There's some beat-up Toyota Tercel parked in front of the garage."
"What, the whole six-bay garage??"
"No. Only our garage."

That's odd. That's a really awful place to park. The alley looks like the Super-Slide at Funtown USA, and the apron is on such a steep tilt that the only thing responsible for the condition of the porch across the street is the brake calipers of the car. I parked there once and spent the next half-hour terrified that I'd be fishing my car out of the river.

So he's made a poor parking decision on several counts: 1) under a no parking sign, b) on really unstable ground, xvii) in front of a garage, &) in a car whose driver seems to have mistaken duct-tape for Bondo.

Roommate's reporting of the incident resulted in the appearance of a "No Parking" sign on the garage.

Act 2: Gezundheit

The car is parked in front of our garage again, this time when I get home from work. And only our garage. Clearly the person using this non-space is accustomed to having what he laughingly believes is the privilege, and must be carefully disabused. I park on the street and go into the apartment.

Me: "We need to figure out how to call foul on that car parked on the apron in front of the garage."
Roommate: "Drive our enemies before us and hear the lamentation of the women!"
Me: "Well...no, that's not quite what I..."
Roommate: "Salt the earth so that nothing shall grow where their blood was spilt!"
Me: "We did just move into the neighborhood; I don't want to start a feud with a neighbor--"
Roommate: "Burn their villages and enslave their children unto the seventh generation!"
Me: "...I'll call the building super in the morning and see if there's a by-the-book procedure for asserting one's parking privilege."

Footnote: Roommate Red's got a temper.

Act 3: Manchester United, 4

So the next day I went to 39 Hill to talk to the managers about how they handle pirate parking. Clearly this is a problem that they've dealt with before; I indicated that given that I didn't want the garage or my car damaged by a vengeful spirit who already made it clear that he didn't believe in the Man's rules and customs, I was looking for a hands-free way of managing the issue.

At press time, management has issued the magic spell "Accio Tow Truck," a phone number that will make the problem go away anonymously, sparing me a feud with the neighbors. Mr. Tickets and his rebel Tercel will foot the bill, as is right and proper.

We'll see what happens tonight.

FIN

[April]

oooh I hope to have an update by tomorrow!

[Jay 2K Winger]

Time to break out the popcorn!

[Kogarashi]

Prologue:
Act 1:
Act 2: Gezundheit
Act 3: Manchester United, 4

Oh man, can't wait for the sequel. Pass the popcorn, Jay.

[Ben_Who]

I will say that it's very satisfying to wear Argabarga's shoes for a few days. As in, there's no version of this where Toyotaman comes out on top - he either stops parking in front of the garage willingly or unwillingly.

Trouble is, my decision to keep everything non-confrontational has also left everything uncertain. The car was gone when I went to park the next day, and no one blocked my garage. Soooo...maybe building management brought the hammer down, and faced with the prospect of spending money on towing fees that would better be spent on duct tape, he wisely saw the error of his ways and chose to park elsewhere.

Or, maybe he just happened to park somewhere else the next day, building management didn't do a friggin' thing, and he'll be back in that space tonight, oblivious.

I hope I've seen the last of him. Having my own garage is sooooo cool.

[DGoddessChardonnay]

Has there been any update on this?

I am just LMAO over that roommate . . .is he part Viking by chance and does he like Spam?

[Ben_Who]

I shooed him away a few days ago. I was bloody lucky that time, I'll tell you; I was on my way to work and walking down Pierson Lane JUST as I watched the Tercel pass me and pull onto the apron behind the garage. Without breaking stride, I tapped on the window and said, "You need to park somewhere else. I gotta get my car outta the garage."

Without a word, the two bros in the car heeled backward and rolled off down Pierson Lane, and I claimed my car from the garage and thought no more of it. It could have been nasty if I'd been a few minutes later, spotted the Tercel and no bros in sight. I would have been hilariously late for work.

My roommate, when he uses the garage (we sort of swap off) just parks it on the apron, in the Danger Zone, so the whole conflict is sort of abstract to him; I prefer to tuck my car in at night (as long as I'm paying for the space...) We the rightful tenants ARE allowed to park on the apron; I just don't feel very secure doing so.

Anywho, these twits have now been told off by both tenants and the management. I haven't seen them for a while - I'm using the parking lot this week - but I still don't have a magic wand to deal with them.

Pity. They'd make very pretty frogs.

[bainsidhe]

One more thing I don't miss about apartment living. I really hope you've seen the last of them.

In my very first apartment, a neighbor's friends would park in the spot sis & I shared. Street parking was always packed and we let it slide a few times...until we didn't. Mr. Tow Truck towed their friends I think three different times, and I swear they still didn't get the hint. The started parking immediately behind the cars at the bottom of a steep slope (no parking zone), and finally took over another neighbor's space who wasn't using it. When neighbor finally wanted to start using his own space, he asked neighbors to move the car and they didn't. They were angry and shock, SHOCKED I say, that their car was towed.

[icmedia]

I used to live in an apartment and, when I signed the lease, I asked about parking. I had my everyday driver and a second vehicle I used for my catering company, so I was concerned by the fact that there was only one assigned parking spot.

"Don't worry, there's on-the-street parking over on the corner, and you can park your second vehicle there!" is the response I got. Sounds good to me, I checked and there was, in fact, street parking allowed. Lease signed.

In the year that I lived there, I received 4 phone calls from the police about "neighbors" who had called in my vehicle as "abandoned." I told them to check the plates-it was registered to the address of the building it was sitting in front of. 3 times, someone had it towed with no warning.

I never figured out who it was that kept getting their panties in a bunch about my van, but it ended up costing me over $300 in tows before I decided to move in with my (now) wife-who had plenty of parking and zero asshole neighbors.

[Minflick]

Zero asshole neighbors - that's a RARE neck of the woods!

[Slave to the Phone]

People can be really strange when it comes to parking on the street. Our neighborhood has legal street parking, but everyone has ample parking room off the street so its rare to see a car parked on the street.

One day, I came home to find a pick-up parked on the street in front of our house. Going by the oil under the truck, I guessed it had broken down. It stayed there for about a week. I didn't care, it wasn't blocking me from getting out of my driveway, it was legally parked and its not my street.

One of the neighbors threw a fit over it, though. I have no idea why, it wasn't blocking him and the only way he could see it was if he walked out of his yard to the street. Neighbor ended up calling the cops and a very nice sheriff came out, ran the tags, knocked on doors and found out that it belonged to a different neighbor who had had it towed back, but left it there because the tow-truck couldn't get it into his back yard.

[protege]

People can be really strange when it comes to parking on the street.

You have no idea...

During the day, street parking is allowed in my neighborhood. At night, the cars can't be left out. Doing so can get you a nice expensive (about $400 ) fine.

Most of the people where I live don't give a crap. As long as the car isn't blocking someone's driveway, or on the grass, you can park there. But, the people that once lived next to my parents? Hell no. These losers (and I'm being nice, but what else do you call someone that spends $200,000--more than the house was worth--on their lawn?) decided that because they lived on the street, only *they* were allowed to park in front of their house.

If they got wind of any party or other gathering happening in the neighborhood, the loser husband would get both of their cars out on the street, adjusting them "just so" there was no way anyone else could park in front of their sacred turf. He would arrange the cars in such a way that he'd occasionally box-in someone already parked, and then *refuse* to move his vehicle to let them out.

If it wasn't that, they would actually call the cops on people who had parked "illegally." The cops would come, see that the car in question wasn't on the grass or blocking the driveway, and leave. At least once, the cops (never a single officer, always a pair) would tell the losers that they "do not own the street, and anyone could park there."

Naturally, I'd park there all the time...just to torque them off

[wolfie]

He would arrange the cars in such a way that he'd occasionally box-in someone already parked, and then *refuse* to move his vehicle to let them out.

Has he ever used a compact car to box-in an F350 with a brush guard?

[Lovecats]

Has he ever used a compact car to box-in an F350 with a brush guard?

Now THAT I'd want to see. Not just pics; a video .

[protege]

Has he ever used a compact car to box-in an F350 with a brush guard?

Nah, he had full-sized Cadillacs and Oldsmobiles. No compacts here....

But, I did get to see what happens when you block someone's driveway in the town I went to college. I was at my then-girlfriend's house, and some idiot had blocked her neighbor's driveway. He came home, and found that he couldn't berth his huge, 454-powered Chevy in its usual spot. Not to worry, he fired up the Chevy...and pushed the offending Honda down the street. I'm sure the driver was wondering when he found that not only had the car been moved...but the sprinkler nearby was flooding the interior because he was stupid enough to leave the windows down