2 WTF's

Irving Patrick Freleigh · #1 02-12-2008, 11:49 PM

I work in a rectal haberdashery. I deal with asshats every day, of both the customer and coworker variety.

WTF #1

Was putting away some stock in HBA when I encounter this ass-sombrero:

SC: (whistles at me) Hey! You there, guy! Where's the body wash you got on sale?

Strike 1: I prefer to be addressed by something other than "hey, you there." An "excuse me" is always appreciated. You could just start with your question if you want too. But let's put that aside and focus on the bigger offense--you whistled at me like a dog, which I despise, even though I was two feet in front of your face.

Me: Would you happen to know the brand name of the body wash you're looking for?
SC: I dunno, some cherry blossom shit or something like that. It's 4 for $5. I saw it in the paper.

Strike 2: Already with the curse words, and I haven't even started to piss you off yet. I will admit I'm no angel when it comes to slipping curse words into casual conversation, but I at least make sure to curb the potty talk when I'm trying to transact business or when I'm out in public.

Me: I can go run up front and get the ad for you to see which kind you want. Is that okay?
SC: Fuck it. I ain't got all day. (stomps off)

Strike 3: I offer to help you find the specific product you're looking for, and you suddenly decide you're in a hurry and cuss at me some more.

Strike 4: You went to the wrong store. I looked at our ad and we don't have any body wash on sale at 4 bottles for $5. You made a complete slobbering idiot of yourself and you didn't even do it at the right store.

You, my good sir, are so much more than out. Here is your complimentary GTFO.

WTF #2

One sale we are running, however, is buy 2 Fisher Price toys at regular price and get a third free. This particular anal bum cover had a Smart Cycle ($99.99) in her cart along with some other Fisher Price toy.

SC: So, if I get three Fisher Price toys, which one will I get free?
Me: You would get the cheapest one for free.
SC: (cat butt face) Geez! What a rip off! (Stomps off to remove the Smart Cycle from her cart, which I later found shoved in the Hot Wheels/Nerf aisle)
Me: Sorry. I don't make the rules on the sales

Errm....I'm not aware of any BOGO sale where you got charged for the cheaper item and got the more expensive one for free. Here is your complimentary senseless beating with the clue-by-four. And next time put your unwanted items back where you found them.

Dave1982 · #2 02-13-2008, 12:03 AM

Quote:

Quoth Irving Patrick Freleigh

This particular anal bum cover had a Smart Cycle ($99.99) in her cart along with some other Fisher Price toy.

That's An Album Cover....An ALBUM Cover, not "Anal Bum Cover!!!"

Quote:

Quoth Irving Patrick Freleigh

SC: So, if I get three Fisher Price toys, which one will I get free?
Me: You would get the cheapest one for free.
SC: (cat butt face) Geez! What a rip off! (Stomps off to remove the Smart Cycle from her cart, which I later found shoved in the Hot Wheels/Nerf aisle)

Welcome to the real world, dumbass. "Get the third of equal or lesser value free." That's the way it works EVERYWHERE, ALWAYS. The state I'm in right now (dangerously close to burnout), I'd have lost it if someone did that in my store.

PepperElf · #3 02-13-2008, 12:10 AM

yeah... i thought it was common sense... but then again common sense is usually not very common

bainsidhe · #4 02-13-2008, 12:18 AM

Quote:

Quoth Irving Patrick Freleigh

SC: So, if I get three Fisher Price toys, which one will I get free?
Me: You would get the cheapest one for free.
SC: (cat butt face) Geez! What a rip off!

Every. Frickin. Time. I used to work in a DVD/CD store and we would run a "buy 2 get the 3rd free" or similar add every few weeks. EVERY TIME we ran this special, I would have a handful of people each shift tell me they were getting the most expensive one free. Few asked, mind you, I was mostly TOLD which one to make free. I would politely and apologetically explain the special didn't work that way whilst I was internally condemning them to the firey pits of retail hell. This was when I was still an innocent retail drone and was still surprised by such antics. Grr.