Okay, maybe the title will be better than the post. But
So what, pray tell, is a suck cup?
Answer: What me and a couple coworkers have taken to calling those drinking cups with a lid that has a cap similar to the kind you'd find on a bottle of dishwashing liquid. You kinda have to suck on them to get the liquid from the cup into your mouth.
We just thought it was funny. Feel free to steal or permanently borrow as you wish.
Refreshing open about her bodily disfunctions
While I was stocking HBA repacks I encountered this little gem:
Older lady: Are you in charge of this entire section here, or....
Me: What do you need?
OL: I need an enema. Do you have any?
Me: Sure, they're over here. (walks her to the enemas)
I dunno about anybody else here, but if I'm that blocked up I'm going to hunt down the laxatives or enemas my damn self. Just so that as few people as possible have to know that the plumbing has a blockage.
One of many banes of my existence
Hot Wheels collectors.
There's this one guy who's almost always one of the first people in the store. He collects Hot Wheels cars. If we haven't finished stocking toys when he makes his first go-round, he'll drop by again later.
Today, I was working in toys, stocking Hot Wheels cars (wouldn'tcha know it!) when I feel a warm wind blowing on me. I look up, and here's Hot Wheels Guy right in my grill. We're talking serious violation of personal space here, not to mention serious ass breath. I just got the hell out of his way and let him paw through the peghook of newly stocked Hot Wheels.
There used to be two other guys with same
hobby. Sometimes they'd end up fighting amongst themselves for the more desirable cars. Quite entertaining.
If they were feeling particularly fiendish, though, they'd descend on the newbies and ask them to bring down a box of Hot Wheels from backstock for them to root through and assure them the manager said it was okay. Even though it wasn't, so from now on we make a point to tell new employees "If this sketchy-looking guy with a big white beard asks you to bring down a box of Hot Wheels cars for him, don't do it. Tell him we're out instead."