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  • Furniture polish

    The other night this customer asked me if we carried "Old English Furniture polish with nick and scratch coverup". Granted I work in Dairy, but am Fairly familiar with the store, and tell him It "Should" be by the furniture polish in aisle X. He says he checked there and couldn't find it. As it was a very slow night I walked him over there and we checked again. We found the furniture polish, but NOTHING by "Old English" I recommended he try the "True Value" store up the street, or Maybe Lowe's or Home Depot.

    I see the Grocery guy "K" <wavies as I know he checks this site> clocking in so I head over to ask him if he knows weather or not we carry this stuff. The MOD is there as well, so the 4 of us tromp over to Aisle X again to look. No Dice. The MOD says he thinks that the stuff was discontinued after the last reset. So the Customer asks if he knows where he could look online to find a store that sells it, as he doesnt wnat to run all over town to find it. The MOD comments that we have nothing from the "Old English" label so we cant look on a different product to find the website, and noone knows who "owns" the Old English label.

    So I say " why dont you just Google "old english furniture polish" then"

    the customer looks at me with that look on his face and says

    "Ya that might work."

    Lister: This is Crazy. Why are we talking about going to bed with Wilma Flintstone?
    Cat: You're right. We're Nuts! This is an insane conversation....
    Lister: She'll never leave Fred and we know it.

  • #2
    Cute story.

    I used Murphey's Oil Soap though.
    Ridiculous 2009 Predictions: Evil Queen will beat Martha Stewart to death with a muffin pan. All hail Evil Queen! (Some things don't need elaboration.....) -- Jester

    Ridiculous 2010 Predictions: Evil Queen, after escaping prison for last years prediction, goes out and waffle irons Rachel Ray to death. -- SG15Z

    Ridiculous 2011 Prediction: Evil Queen will beat Gordon Ramsay over the head with a cast-iron skillet. -- FireHeart

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    • #3
      google "Old English" in England you will get cider yum yum
      "Light a fire for someone and he will be warm all day,
      set light to someone and he will be warm for the rest of his life" Sir Samuel Vimes

      Real stupidity beats artificial intelligence every time.

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      • #4
        Google Olde English 800 will get you ultra nasty gutter brand malt liquor in the US.

        To give you an idea, it is what the equivalent of your "chavs" drink here.
        I feel crazy. Like I'm drunk and trapped in a water globe and someone won't stop shaking it.
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        • #5


          http://images.google.ca/images?rlz=1...=1&sa=N&tab=wi
          Otaku

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          • #6
            Quoth wanderingjoe72 View Post
            Google Olde English 800 will get you ultra nasty gutter brand malt liquor in the US.

            To give you an idea, it is what the equivalent of your "chavs" drink here.
            A bit off-topic, but this could be the origin of the Vinegar Boy saga. Being underage, he couldn't get malt liquor, and seeing that malt vinegar was roughly the same colour and available without ID, he thought it was an acceptable substitute. Epic fail.
            Any fool can piss on the floor. It takes a talented SC to shit on the ceiling.

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            • #7
              Quoth wolfie View Post
              A bit off-topic, but this could be the origin of the Vinegar Boy saga. Being underage, he couldn't get malt liquor, and seeing that malt vinegar was roughly the same colour and available without ID, he thought it was an acceptable substitute. Epic fail.
              Good question, however I'm not sure if Olde English 800 is even sold in Australia (where the saga of Vinegar Boy occurred.)

              But he could have wanted similar and couldn't get it because he was underage, as I understood VB to be a teenager.

              Either way, definitely MAJOR FAIL.

              Back to the OP: Old English furniture polish is manufactured by a company called Reckett-Benickser. And if you Google, you'll find the Old English furniture polish website.

              Happy polishing.
              Human Resources - the adult version of "I'm telling Mom." - Agent Anthony "Tony" DiNozzo (NCIS)

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              • #8
                Quoth wolfie View Post
                A bit off-topic, but this could be the origin of the Vinegar Boy saga. Being underage, he couldn't get malt liquor, and seeing that malt vinegar was roughly the same colour and available without ID, he thought it was an acceptable substitute. Epic fail.
                Yeah, that's pretty much what I've figured.

                I refuse to ponder further lest it become an "If it weren't for my horse..." situation.
                ...WHY DO YOU TEMPT WHAT LITTLE FAITH IN HUMANITY I HAVE!?! -- Kalga
                And I want a pony for Christmas but neither of us is getting what we want OK! What you are asking is impossible. -- Wicked Lexi

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                • #9
                  I've noticed that my first reaction to not knowing something is to google it, whereas my parents reaction is to look it up in a book, or call someone who might know.
                  The High Priest is an Illusion!

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