Yes, as a matter of fact, that is important

[KeresM]

Customer brought in a car with one of our full service oil change coupons.

Now, for those of you who are completely unfamiliar with cars, there are a few things you should know.

A - Both front tires are in need of air and worn enough that you could grate Parmesan on them. They are not supposed to look like that. Especially not when you are driving in a Minnesota winter.

B - Brakes are not supposed to sound like someone tossed a pig and a bunch of rocks into a blender.

C - Brakes should be able to stop a car going 3 miles an hour in under ten feet. Fortunately, our mechanic has reflexes slightly better than those possessed by the average snail and managed to get out of the way, and the rear bay door was still open. (may not have been entirely the fault of the brakes)

D - Windshields are designed so that one may see out of them. As such it is the generally accepted practice to remove mud and ice from them before putting the vehicle into motion.

E - It is customary to change oil every 3,000 miles and transmission fluid every 30,000. Confusing the two is NOT good for your vehicle.

F - The stuff coming out of your exhaust pipe should be neither black nor billowing.

G - It is only customary to start one's car by rubbing two wires together in Detroit.

H - Two lug nuts is not considered sufficient to hold a tire on

I - One is supposed to register one's vehicle every year, not every century.


He was absolutely furious when we refused to service his vehicle. Fortunately, he argued long enough that we invited Mr. Police Officer to join the argument. Mr. Police Officer and his buddy, Mr. Handcuffs, won the argument.

Unfortunately, as we'd witnessed the idiot consuming an alcoholic beverage in the waiting room, it may be difficult to make the drunk driving charge stick even though the breathalyzer results would indicate that he had to have been drunk when he pulled the car up.

[hinakiba777]

How do these people get on the road? I don't understand it! I think car care should be on the written exam for your license.

"Your front tires are flat in the middle of the winter and your brakes aren't working.. Do you drive the car?"

Anyway who says yes should be placed on an icy strip, and the power's that be can sort them out.

Personal Tale of Epic Fail in Car Care=
I once accidentally cut into my fuel intake line when the asphalt was sharp. Not sure if it was that exactly, though. Something was cut by the sharp edge of the road and it make my car leak gas. (Where the while line should have been was this sharp edge.)

[Hobbs]

You have to give the guy credit, though. He was drunk, in a car w/ no tires, brakes or visibility and managed to drive it all the way to the service station.

[JLRodgers]

Nothing like bad breaks to scare the crap out of you (I had brakes on a car that I was told were fine, "magically" fall apart from rust not two weeks later.... and I was approaching city traffic when they broke... at 70mph)

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

Jeez, how old was this hoopty?

The car sounds like a candidate for Pimp My Ride, but Xhibit would need to be able to safely get the car to the shop, and the owner doesn't deserve it anyway.

[blas]

People like that are able to get away with driving vehicles with those conditions, on top of all that not renewing their plates every year, but NO....the very day one of my headlights goes out and I don't have time to stop at AutoZone before work because they are CLOSED....I get pulled over. Whatever.

[Spiffy McMoron]

C - Brakes should be able to stop a car going 3 miles an hour in under ten feet. Fortunately, our mechanic has reflexes slightly better than those possessed by the average snail and managed to get out of the way, and the rear bay door was still open. (may not have been entirely the fault of the brakes)

Heh--this happened once back in my Crappy Tire days. It was a hot summer day, and to get some breeze moving through the shop, the east and west bay doors were open.

This random guy drives through the shop, and crashes his car into a safety barrier protecting the shipping area. After he got out of the car, he didn't realize his drove through a shop! That guy was lucky no one was in the middle of the shop!

[HawaiianShirts]

Very entertaining. I'm happy to see that this guy was not allowed to drive away from your shop in his condition, both for my sake and for the sake of his poor car.

D - Windshields are designed so that one may see out of them. As such it is the generally accepted practice to remove mud and ice from them before putting the vehicle into motion.

Come explain this to the people who live in my city. I regularly see people racing down the road early in the morning, their car covered in frost and their windshield wipers flapping in fierce futility. They're lucky to be getting light through all the ice on their windows, let alone any discernible shapes. They do the same thing with snow, though, since it is less likely to weld itself to the car, they'll at least brush a small viewing hole just above the steering wheel before barreling down the road with no clue what's behind or beside them and a cloud of ice particles creating a comet-like tail in their wake.

E - It is customary to change oil every 3,000 miles and transmission fluid every 30,000. Confusing the two is NOT good for your vehicle.

Confusing the two mileages or confusing the two fluids? If mileages, then I'm not all that surprised (I knew a girl who drove a new car for about 20,000 miles without changing the oil once, then complained the manufacturer made "crap" cars because her engine "melted"). If fluids, though, my curiosity forces me to ask: what does transmission fluid do to an engine, and what does oil do to a transmission?

[RetailWorkhorse]

a cloud of ice particles creating a comet-like tail in their wake.

WHOOOOOOSH!

"What was THAT?!"

"What was what?"

"That black and white ball of ice!"

"....WORKHORSE!"

*Meanwhile, in the car*

RW: "Why the FRACK won't the stupid ice melt? That's it, I'm moving to ARIZONA. Where'd my Jimmy Buffet CD go?"



...okay, I only did it ONCE and I was positive the ice would melt by the time I hit the bank to drop the deposit.

[Bandit]

If fluids, though, my curiosity forces me to ask: what does transmission fluid do to an engine, and what does oil do to a transmission?

It leads to a lot of smoke and then, well, picture the sound of bowling balls in an industrial-grade dryer followed shortly with a large deposit of metal on the road as the internal parts of both try to escape from the housings. Lots of profanity will then follow.

B

[El Pollo Guerrera]

People like that are able to get away with driving vehicles with those conditions, on top of all that not renewing their plates every year, but NO....the very day one of my headlights goes out and I don't have time to stop at AutoZone before work because they are CLOSED....I get pulled over. Whatever.

I hear ya. Two years ago I forgot to renew my auto insurance early, and the day AFTER my insurance expired I was pulled over. Couldn't catch a break, even with a clean driving record, no accidents in 15 years of driving (well, I'VE had no accidents, but vehicles I have owned have been in two that were 100% the other driver's fault)... a $600 ticket.

At least they didn't impound my car, which they could have done... They let me get it towed home.

I renewed my insurance the next day... I walked. I couldn't afford to take any more chances.

[KeresM]

Confusing the two mileages or confusing the two fluids? If mileages, then I'm not all that surprised (I knew a girl who drove a new car for about 20,000 miles without changing the oil once, then complained the manufacturer made "crap" cars because her engine "melted"). If fluids, though, my curiosity forces me to ask: what does transmission fluid do to an engine, and what does oil do to a transmission?

Based on what the mechanic said when he peeked under the car and the sticker on the car windshield from the previous oil change, the oil probably hadn't been changed in a couple years. The guy kept saying though that he'd changed the oil every couple thousand miles and did it himself, and waved around a bottle of transmission fluid for emphasis.

So...your guess is as good as mine there.

I'm honestly impressed by the fact this car was still running. Honestly, it was a tribute to the quality of work GM was once able to put out. The mechanic said that for all it looked, it would probably have taken less than two grand to get it ship-shape again.

[Becks]

It is only customary to start one's car by rubbing two wires together in Detroit.

Parts of Milwaukee, too.

Oh, and if you live along Rt. 21 in NJ, never expect your car to be in the parking lot the next morning.

[Chromatix]

The rule for driving: "Always be able to stop in the distance you can see to be clear. On narrow roads, half that distance."

If you can't see through the windscreen, you can't see *any* of the road to be clear. Therefore, you cannot move at all.

If your brakes don't work... you'll have to be going very slowly in order to be able to stop in the distance you can see ahead.

BTW, catastrophic brake failure is one reason why the handbrake is called the "emergency brake". In Britain though, we just call it the "handbrake", because it's used for parking more often than to mitigate mechanical failure.