I make it not secret. I am an jackass. If someones rude to me, I'll sling it back ten times more. Despite how some people here say I'm nice, I'm really not. As follows me at jackass high.
Oregon has the bottle deposit. Basically, you pay an extra five cent for every can/bottle you buy, and then when your done with it, you can return it and get five cents back. Sounds good, and promotes recyclying. However, most people just throw them out, and shitheads grab them and attempt to return them.
Math Skills are Fun!
Lady returns 14 cans. We count. Its good. They are laid out. I give her seventy cents.
Lady: No, you owe me more.
14 cans, at five cents a can, is seventy cents...
Lady: No, Its higher! I counted in my head!
Me: Well its all I'm giving to you.
Lady: We'll see about that! I'm calling your corporate number! Your stealing MY MONEY!!! I need that for SMOKES!!!
She then proceeds to get her pack of smokes using a combination of pennies, sventy cents, her credit card, a gift card, and Oregon EBT, or you know, welfare money.
Going to get fired for doing my job
Guy comes in, turns in four bottles. Tries to turn in a bunch of pepsi cans that we don't sell, and thus cannot accept since we won't get credit for it. Its written on our walls and everything.
Me: "I can take the sesson bottles, but not the 1.5 liter pepsi. We don't sell them.
SC: The lady last night took them.
Me: Cool. I'm not.
SC: What the fuck man!?
Me: I follow the rules. Can't take them.
SC: *Starts to storm out*
Me: Want your 20 cents from the sesson?
SC: You can keep them all for being a DICK!
Me: *shrug* Put twenty cents to the side, planning on explaing to manager incase he tries to do some lying. I also check paperwork from last night to see if she did have bottle returns. Nope, none. I also check the box where we put plastic bottles. None there. So he is a liar. Not surprise.
Twenty minutes later he comes back with Bud Light cans.
Now, the thing about oregon, is that if it has a bottle deposit on it, its stampped on the lid. The cans from Washington do not have stamps, and thus don't have bottle deposits, and we cant accept them. Guess what they are?
Me: Sorry man, this aren't from Oregon. I can't take them.
SC: WTF man!? You are required to take them!!
Me: No I'm not. Also the my coworker didn't take any bottles last night.
SC: I didn't say last night!
Me: "Yeah, excact words, The lady last night took them!"
SC: Well uhh.. it might have been a few days ago!
Me: Then I would ahve taken them.
SC: SHE DID! They be in here right! *Dives head first into the plastic bin, searching desperatly for those plastic bottles that don't exsist.*
SC: YOU STOLE THEM!!!
ME: .... I stole garbage? What am I, a mirror? I'm not you.
SC: *blinks* Your an asshole. I want your name and store number. I want your managers number.
Me: *Give store number, give corporate number, give first name. Don't tell him my last as I'm not required too*
SC: I'm going to get you fired!
Me: *Finishing my cherry pepsi* Want your twenty cents now? I can throw in this for an extra five cents if you want.
Plaidman's a sexual fantasy again
Oregon law allows places of business that have less then 5000 square feet of space to refuse more then 50 bottles from a person per day. It use to be 144 bottles. ZThis naturally led to much much more, and with no place to store all those cans and bottles, would often have leaky bags leading to food or such. Not very healthy. Glad they changed it.
Man storms in, slams bottles down, I point to a few we can't take, he storms out, comes back in with more. At this point I tell him he's at his limit.
SC: NO! You have to take them ALL!!!
ME: *points to sign* 50 cans/bottles. Your limit.
Me: *Print it out, hand him recipt. When its over a dollar, people sign it. Mostly so other shifts can check it and make sure these people stop at their limit*
Sign here please...
SC: *signs FUCK YOU SHITHEAD*
Now, this is where I can be an ass. If people treat me like that, I'll give it worst without getting in trouble.
ME: "Ok Mr. Shithead, *hands a mostly torn dollar I gotten earler, and 30 nickles* Have a nice day.
SC: *Staring at his money* What the hell!? Gah. My girlfriend hates you. She dreams of slitting your neck and us fucking in your blood!!!
Me: *nodding* I'm flattered she has fantasies of me and not of you sir. Have a good day Mr. Shithead.
SC: I'm going to kill you one of these days.
ME: *taking a drink of soda* Sure.
SC: You best be scared
ME: I suppose dirty bottles might get me sick...
SC: *he leaves, laughing maniaclly* Few minutes later, I hear a loud slam and glass breaking. Glancing outside my window, I see the shit head threw the two 40 oz bottles I couldn't accept against my store, shattering glass everywhere.
I pocket my boxcutter, (better safe then sorry) and grab a broom to sweep up the glass before someone steps on it and sues. I faintly see the maniac running off in the distance still laughing.