DiGiornio's can kiss my ass!

[Jester]

I hate the microwave, and almost never buy frozen dinners.

Tonight, coming home from an event, I was hungry, didn't want to cook, it was too late to order in, and I wanted something other than the usual sushi/salads/sandwiches that are ready to go in my local all-night grocery store.

So I stopped in the frozen food aisle, and while I was tempted to get something Asian, all these DiGiornio's ads I've seen lately made me think, "Well, lots of frozen food is getting much better than in the past. Go for it. How bad can it be? After all, you HAVE had decent frozen pizza before."

As the son of an ad man, you would think I would know better than to be suckered in by clever advertising. And you, of course, would be completely wrong.

I bought the DiGiornio's. I cooked it in the nuke, according to the instructions. And I haven just finished eating it.

Delivery pizza without the delivery? Two words, DiGiornio's: My motherfucking ass! Shit was crap, tasted like crap, tasted like frozen crap pizza nuked in the fucking microwave, and the only thing it had in common with delivery pizza was I used the same plate and the same mouth I would on delivery pizza. The stuff in between the plate and the mouth was barely edible, let alone tasty or comparable to delivery pizza.

So DiGiornio's, do me a favor. Take your marketing department out for a tropical field trip. Meet me at the docks. Pay no mind to the boat, the duct tape, the various knives and saws, or the chum bucket, and just leave your marketing department folks with me. Yeah, that's a good soul-sucking corporation, good boy, yes!

[RecoveringKinkoid]

Jester, you ate a frozen pizza you had cooked in the nuke, and you are suprised it tasted like ass?

Seriously?

Listen. When choosing "meals" such as this, the idea isn't to find one that tastes good. That is a fool's errand. The idea is to find one you can keep down.

So...did it stay down?

Cut the marketing department some slack here. Their boss probably told them "describe this product without using the words "ass," "shit," or "vomit." If they managed to do that, they did their jobs. I know there must be some semblance of truth in advertising, at least on paper, but I guess the taste of ass is subjective.

[Stormraven]

Red Baron's. Much better. If you can't do a local pizzeria, I would recommend RB over Domino's or Pizza Hut. (I like both, but I've also tasted much better than both.)

[Greenday]

DiGiornio's tastes much better when you're a college student and the school food is crap. But during the summer when I'm home and eating real meals, I wouldn't touch DiGiornio's with a ten foot pole.

[ArcticChicken]

I cooked it in the nuke, according to the instructions.

Well, there's your problem.

Seriously, you nuked your pizza?

Never, ever, cook a frozen dinner in the microwave if there is and oven option. Ever.

Listen to me, for I am the mistress of making crap-from-a-box into something that resembles real food.

Your second problem was that you don't appear to have done anything besides nuke it. I personally get pepperoni and sausage pizza and add parmesan cheese, feta cheese, and red pepper flakes before I bake it.

On the other hand, there aren't any really good pizza places around here, so my standards are much lower.

Which reminds me, when I visit my Mom next week I need to get her to take me to that coal fired pizza place who's name I can't remember. Heavenly.

[ArcticChicken]

Red Baron's.

Come to think of it, I usually buy Red Baron's, too.

[Amethyst Hunter]

Red Baron's. Much better.

YES. Three words: four-cheese pizza! My favorite from that line. :9 <3

I would recommend RB over Domino's or Pizza Hut.

Pizza Butt is way better than Dumbino's IMO.

And hell yes, DiGiornio's is crap on a raft.

Edit to add: Freschetti's also has some decent frozen pizzas; it depends on the kind you get though. Also recommend California Pizza Kitchen's frozen Margharita Pizza. Yummy!

[Bella_Vixen]

Jester, have I told you lately that I your way with words?

[RecoveringKinkoid]

Jester, have I told you lately that I your way with words?

I know, right? I read this:

and the only thing it had in common with delivery pizza was I used the same plate and the same mouth I would on delivery pizza.

and nearly sprayed beer on my screen.

And by the way, it's shit beer, too. Holy smoke, I'm looking over here to see what I'm drinking and it actually has fucking camo on the can. Camo on the can. Who bought this stuff?????? Miller High Life Light. I can't even believe I'm drinking this. But you know, when I popped the top (and really, you pop a top on a beer, dont' you expect it to be shit beer anyways?) I thought, "oh, look, shit beer. Glug glug glug." It's beer and it's 1:30 am. I was not expecting any quality and I was not disappointed. I'm talking to you, Jester.

[AdminAssistant]

Err...I like DiGiornio's? But then, I like thick chewy crust. And yes, poor college student = lower standards. And poor grad student = cardboard with cheese? Is it free? I'll eat it! I usually only get their single-serve, though.

Red Baron's is okay, and Tony's is okay. I don't bother with the rest - too expensive. There's a local pizza joint that specializes in wheat crust pizza (soooooo good) and their large, 1-topping is around 8 bucks with a coupon. Not spending that much on frozen pizza.

[dalesys]

DiGiornio's can kiss my ass!

Oh, they can all kiss my ass, Lord, they can all kiss my ass
If they wanna kiss my ass, well they better do it fast, 'cause we're all gonna die someday
-- We're All Gonna Die Someday - Kasey Chambers

[Caveat Emptor]

I used to buy single-serv multi-packs of Tony's frozen deep-dish (haven't seen it down here since I moved) because oftentimes I would be too lazy or tired to do anything other than nuke something. It was OK, not gourmet by far, but I've tasted far worse. The worst pizza I've ever had is from the caf in the building I'm working at right now. If I ever recommend pizza to any new hires, I tell them to go to the caf in the next building which has a Pizza Hut Express.

[Antisocial_Worker]

I miss the Tony's Mexican-style pizza. Cornmeal crust... nummy.

If I want real pizza, however, I go about two miles up the road to a place called Marco's. They make this pizza that uses ranch dressing instead of tomato sauce...

[draftermatt]

I only tried DiGiornio's once, didn't care for it, and it was in the oven no less. If I do frozen pizza anymore it's Tombstone only. (Because my wife doesn't eat the other one's, I do like Red Baron, Tony's and Celeste)

Unless it's a Celeste Pizza for one. They aren't too bad in the microwave.

[tropicsgoddess]

Stouffer's French Bread Pizza, Red Baron or Totino's are my faves. The Totino's pizzas are cheap, but taste good.