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"How Am I Going To Shave My Balls?"
  #1  
Old 11-27-2009, 04:09 AM
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Default "How Am I Going To Shave My Balls?"

As I ranted in Irv's Black Friday Debriefing 2009 thread, I am working 6 days straight, have homework pouring out my ears, on a diet and generally feeling like crap because I'm exhausted. I worked today and will work all weekend, all the way through to Sunday. Only cashier on for several hours both today and tomorrow.

Aid of Rite made a booboo in their 3 day sale flyer and forgot to put a notice on the razors advertised for this week as one per household on all the varieties, and had us print out a sign saying that fact. We did print it and post it. The sign is small but it's there.

</backstory>

Two people come up front with two armloads full of razors of different varieties and as soon as I see it my heart sinks.

"One per household."

"Excuse me?"

"One per household."

"How am I going to shave my balls?"

"One per household."

"That's not what the flyer said. You have to give it to me."

"No I do not. It is one per household."

"No. The flyer does not say that. Show me it."

"*shows them handy dandy corporate printout* This is a correction to the ad. One per household."

"Then I need a manager."

Not So Awesome Manager takes a minute and they are already insulting him and calling him "stupidvisor", which gets my blood boiling. (He's not as good as Awesome Manager but he is a fairly decent guy). He comes over and explains to them this is a correction to the ad and they will only sell them one per household. Razor Nitwits' voices get louder and louder as they demand corporate names and numbers and "this is false advertising!" and "I used to work at "'Wook's' pharmacy and they would honor the advertised price every time so you MUST GIVE US THESE RAZORS NOW" and "I don't want to be a pain in the ass but you're not being very helpful." (Oh did I so resist wanting to cough 'bullshit' into my hands.)

Fianlly, Not So Awesome Manager takes them over to the rack and shows them the sign that says "One Per Household" that taped to the sign advertising no rainchecks. Someone mysteriously ripped the one per household sign off. . Razor Nitwits finally left everything there, and left, but not before calling me snippy.
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  #2  
Old 11-27-2009, 04:11 AM
Irving Patrick Freleigh's Avatar
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Quote:
Quoth ralerin View Post

"How am I going to shave my balls?"
"Very carefully."
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  #3  
Old 11-27-2009, 04:15 AM
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Um....

The same way you shave anything else? With your eyes closed, using fast strokes and a couple splashes of lemon juice?
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  #4  
Old 11-27-2009, 05:23 AM
jackfaire jackfaire is offline
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*pulls out gardening shears* Actually we have a new shave our customer's balls for free special going on right now

  #5  
Old 11-27-2009, 06:16 AM
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Maybe you should have asked him if he'd like to know the real meaning of snippy. Then, he wouldn't have to worry about shaving his balls.

I probably would have said something to that effect. After all, I used to help my dad castrate pigs when I was a kid.
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  #6  
Old 11-27-2009, 07:08 AM
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Quote:
Quoth ralerin View Post
"How am I going to shave my balls?"
"How can you shave something that doesn't exist?"
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  #7  
Old 11-27-2009, 07:26 AM
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Quote:
Quoth XCashier View Post
"How can you shave something that doesn't exist?"
I can go one better:

"Did you want to buy a microscope today as well? We can throw in some tweezers and some spray starch....all in 4 easy instalments of just $29.95 plus postage and handling."

Yeah, my mind's gone to sewer level today....
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  #8  
Old 11-27-2009, 08:05 AM
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I'm pretty sure depending on where you live and how much money your willing to spend, you can find someone who will help you with your problem.
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  #9  
Old 11-27-2009, 10:47 AM
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Quote:
Quoth jackfaire View Post
*pulls out gardening shears* Actually we have a new shave our customer's balls for free special going on right now
Alternatively merely direct them to the power tools department and wish them luck

  #10  
Old 11-28-2009, 03:18 AM
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Quote:
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*pulls out gardening shears* Actually we have a new shave our customer's balls for free special going on right now
Act now and we'll throw in a free .
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Last edited by tropicsgoddess; 12-02-2009 at 05:37 AM.
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