Simple solutions for simple (people's) problems

[Kal]

First off, I'm not an IT worker, I just happen to know how to use a computer and was foolish enough to be spotted as such. Given I currently work in pensions in a department made up largely of ladies of my parents' age then that makes me the first port of call in a disaster.
I've had to fix someone's excel sheet where they'd managed to "delete" the entire departments record of work. This was done by showing them the little slider at the bottom of the sheet and moving it back over to the left.
For some reason on our system, pressing the scroll lock button in the dos based system causes it to lock until you press it again. At least once a day someone will manage to do that and not realise it (or remember how to fix it).
The main issue though is people rushing their work, making a simple error then going "Why is it not working? Come and look at it." My standard method of walking over, getting them to repeat the attempt and watching as it suddenly "works again" once they pay attention to what they're doing. My explanation in this case has a choice of three reasons, "Computers are afraid of me and work when I'm near", "Computers don't work when you're nearby but at least you'll be useful if Skynet or the Matrix actually occur" and "Because you don't pay attention to what you're doing, this is the third time today!" After three times I just ignore them unless I'm specifically told to go and help by a manager.

[Gerrinson]

I'm sorry, but did you say DOS based system? I learned to program in DOS... two decades ago. Perhaps your company should upgrade both the system and your coworkers to something a little more recent?

Other than that, I know the feeling. I used to be tier 1 & 2 helpdesk at my previous employer - after volunteering to assist the IT manager with general hardware repairs. I should have know better.

And, of course, I'm now the 'go to' guy for IT issues. Fortunately, I don't have admin access so for a lot of the problems I get to refer them to our helpdesk.

[Kal]

Yes, I did indeed say DOS. It's a rather long story but basically the company's been bought and sold quite a few times in the last couple of decades. Since upgrading will cost money and things work atm, albeit with bodges and manual work arounds, somehow the upgrades never actually materialise.

[RealUnimportant]

Scroll Lock is supposed to stay on until pressed again - otherwise it would be Scroll Shift

[Jay 2K Winger]

Quoth Kal

"Computers are afraid of me and work when I'm near", "Computers don't work when you're nearby but at least you'll be useful if Skynet or the Matrix actually occur" and "Because you don't pay attention to what you're doing, this is the third time today!"

I have lines like that that I use, often with my dear sweet Mom, who is learning, but still has bad luck with technology.

My favorite is "Remember, computers can smell fear."