You Have No Idea How Funny Y'all Are!

[tropicsgoddess]

These were from a co-worker of mine and these are short and sweet stories. Fellow hotel biz peeps will definitely get a riot outta this!


Funny #1:

Customer expects to find a hotel with a 1 bedroom suite that's beach front for $80/night for Virginia Beach, VA!


Funny #2:

Customer has 4 adults and 8 children wants everyone in one room at El Cheapo Inn or Penny Pincher Lodge. What's funny about that is because those hotels are known for having small rooms.

[Merriweather]

Customer expects to find a hotel with a 1 bedroom suite that's beach front for $80/night for Virginia Beach, VA!

I lived in Virginia Beach over 20 years ago, and I'm not sure you could have found one for that even back then

[BroSCFischer]

I live in small town PA, and if you're REALLY lucky, and we are slow, we MIGHT sell our suite for under $100.00.

Once again, we are not beachfront, and we are a middle to economy class hotel.

As for the second story, fire codes restrict our rooms max. occ. to 5 people (we might be able to get that up to 6 or 7 for a suite). I don't think I've ever seen a hotel room that would allow 12 people to occupy it.

[bhskittykatt]

I live in small town PA, and if you're REALLY lucky, and we are slow, we MIGHT sell our suite for under $100.00.

Once again, we are not beachfront, and we are a middle to economy class hotel.

As for the second story, fire codes restrict our rooms max. occ. to 5 people (we might be able to get that up to 6 or 7 for a suite). I don't think I've ever seen a hotel room that would allow 12 people to occupy it.

There are suites that could accommodate 12 people. I couldn't find any in Virginia Beach, or anywhere else in Virginia. A quick search found me a hotel suite on the East Coast in Martha's Vineyard . Oceanfront, sleeps up to 15....and during the summer rates start at $2395.

Or you could stay at a suite in Nantucket...for $3600 a night. That's not oceanfront, though.

My motel is determinedly not oceanfront. It's economy-class, and it's $60/night for one person. For 12, you'd need three rooms since 4 is the max occupancy we can allow per room, and the rate goes up to $70 per room then, so $210/night for 12. I can think of one room locally you can probably squeeze 12 people in without pissing off the fire dept (and that's if they bring sleeping bags), and this time of year it runs for about $2500 a night during the week. And hey, it's right on the water!
, too

[Jester]

Customer expects to find a hotel with a 1 bedroom suite that's beach front for $80/night for Virginia Beach, VA!

I expect Scarlett Johansson to knock on my door in a string bikini hoping to share some beers with me.

Both of us should probably lower our expectations.

[DGoddessChardonnay]

I expect Scarlett Johansson to knock on my door in a string bikini hoping to share some beers with me.

Both of us should probably lower our expectations.

The day you have that happen to you will probably be the day I find myself kicked back out here on my deck having a few drinks with Robert Vaughn.

$80/night in VA Beach??? Believe me, if Oak Island NC ain't gonna have rooms for $80 a night, VA Beach ain't either . . . and VA Beach is way more populated in the summer months.

What were those people smoking and did they bring enough to share?

[Mr Hero]

I expect Scarlett Johansson to knock on my door in a string bikini hoping to share some beers with me.

Both of us should probably lower our expectations.

I'm lowering mine. I don't even expect she'll bring the bikini.

[AccountingDrone]

We paid $87 for a room at a beachside hotel in Va Beach ... in Feb.

That was with military discount and being really nice to the guy on the desk.

[Jester]

Being really nice can be a great thing. In the last two days alone, we have had drinks bought for us by our bartenders just for no reason whatsoever, other than being our usual awesome selves.

And at Johnson Space Center in Houston, since I was very patient while the parking lot attendants were switching out their drawers, the lady waved me through without charging me for parking, even though I had the exact change in my hand ready to go.

People ask me why I get so lucky so often, with free upgrades and free shit. (And it does happen to me very often.) Why? Because I'm not a raging douchebag, and I'm (usually) very patient.

[tropicsgoddess]

People ask me why I get so lucky so often, with free upgrades and free shit. (And it does happen to me very often.) Why? Because I'm not a raging douchebag, and I'm (usually) very patient.

Customers don't realize (especially the SC's and EW's) that we may be at the low end of the totem pole but we can hook you up with some cool stuff if you're nice to us or we can give you the shit scraping the bottom of the barrel if you're an asshole.

[Amanita]

I'm convinced my being nice to hotel workers has worked to my benefit in the past. On my first trip to NYC, I stayed in a little hotel with terrace rooms, some of which had views of the Brooklyn Bridge. Now, my flight got in really early in the morning, so it was somewhere between 8:30 and 9 am when I showed up at the hotel. I didn't expect a room that early, I just checked in to let them know I was there, asking if I could have a room facing the bridge. They said they weren't sure if they could do it, as a wedding party was coming in that same day. Anyhow, I ended up leaving my bags at the hotel and going sight seeing, being told to come back at 3 pm for check in.

3 pm rolled around, and there I was, ready to check in, just like they told me. But they said my room wasn't ready yet. Again, I didn't get upset, from the constantly ringing phone, it sounded like a busy little place. So I sat in the lobby, patiently waiting. In the end, it took almost an hour, but they told me the wait would be worth it, and was it ever! They gave me the best terrace room in the house, a corner room with a wraparound balcony. I got a lot of use out of that terrace, with its lovely views of not just the bridge, but lower Manhattan

I used the same tactic on my second visit, to a hotel in Midtown this time, with view rooms overlooking either midtown or the Hudson. I had requested a city view, but the desk clerk wanted to give me a Hudson view. Again, I remained polite when asking if it would be at all possible to get that city view, even if I had to wait a little longer for housekeeping to have the room ready. It paid off- he asked me to have a seat in the lobby, and give him a few minutes to see what he could do. It took a little time, but he found one for me, and he even threw in a coupon for free breakfast, for the wait. I suspect that had I been sucky, I wouldn't have gotten that- either the extra effort to find a room with the view I wanted, or free breakfast. And yes, that little view room kicked ass- it was hella sweet waking up in the morning, with the likes of One Penn Plaza, Empire State, and Chrysler Building being the first things I saw each day!

Too mad more customers don't understand that- politeness has a way of paying off!

[Merriweather]

Absolutely, you just never know when being nice & friendly to someone can really give some good karma.

When we came back to the US after almost a decade in the UK, money was tight as we needed not only to buy a car, but just about anything electrical - TV, Microwave, DVD, washer & dryer, and so forth and so on. We stayed in a motel while looking for a house to rent, we were there almost 3 weeks. We made friends with one of the housekeepers (she fell in love with our Yorkie), and chatted with her a lot. When she found out we were looking for a car (we'd been using a rental to househunt) she gave us her nephew's business card, he was a used car salesman. So we went out to see what he had. He informed us that his aunt had told him we'd be by, and that he'd best give us a great deal, or he'd have to answer to her - and everyone in the family was afraid to cross auntie So we got a great reliable little car, at a fantastic price, it lasted us thru the 3 years at that duty station, a trip from WV to Florida, endless trips to NC, one trip to CA & back, and the cross-country move to WA, and a couple of years there, and was still in decent shape when we sold it. I firmly believe we'd never have found such a good deal if we had treated Auntie anywhere near the way most motel guests treat housekeepers. And yes, we gave her a thank you gift when we found a house to rent & left the motel.