Douchebag neighbor

[Crossbow]

Well, my best friends have been having a problem with their new neighbor. When they moved in, everything seemed pretty good, but lately, the husband/boyfriend/whatever has started being a world class dick.

Friend A has had to call the police on several occasions due to excessive music volumes when they're home. Apparently the bass levels are such that it's vibrating thing inside A's house, even with all the doors and windows closed. I guess after several visits from the local constabulary, he almost got the hint and stopped playing his music quite so loud in the house.

Now, he plays it that loud when he's in his car in the driveway. When confronted by A about it, he played the race card and claiming harassment. Sigh.

A, however, is pretty much a diplomat, but when riled up, might as well be a force of nature. Her response to this latest bit of douchebaggery?

Mow the lawn. Right next to his car. Gotta trim the weeds next to the house, too.


I told her the next time he plays the music too loud, if the lawn isn't ready to mow, call me. I've got a bunch of lumber, a battery powered circular saw and drill, and hammers. She needs to repair the front porch and steps, right?

[Merriweather]

I told her the next time he plays the music too loud, if the lawn isn't ready to mow, call me. I've got a bunch of lumber, a battery powered circular saw and drill, and hammers. She needs to repair the front porch and steps, right?

No, no, no, you've got that slightly off. Next time he plays the music too loud, you gather together quietly, with above mentioned toys. Have a few nice drinks. Play a game of cards. Wait.

As soon as he turns off the music to relax, or take a nap, or best, have a date over, THEN you start in with your DIY project

[rose_metal_nz]

No, no, no, you've got that slightly off. Next time he plays the music too loud, you gather together quietly, with above mentioned toys. Have a few nice drinks. Play a game of cards. Wait.

As soon as he turns off the music to relax, or take a nap, or best, have a date over, THEN you start in with your DIY project

Oh man, that is pure evil and I LOVE IT! Next time I have neighbour issues, I know who to call for creative ideas!

[Sunshine]

We had a neighbor that would rev his engine at all times of the day and night....until another, larger neighbor with a baseball bat in hand told him that he worked nights....in the oilfield, and needed his sleep. It was amazing how fast neighbor number one quit the rev routine

[Catwoman2965]

We had a neighbor that would rev his engine at all times of the day and night....until another, larger neighbor with a baseball bat in hand told him that he worked nights....in the oilfield, and needed his sleep. It was amazing how fast neighbor number one quit the rev routine

Amazing how a bat can make a difference!

[Crossbow]

Amazing how a bat can make a difference!

Except that this guy will immediately go to the police screaming racism, harassment and assault. He's quick to call the cops when it's to his advantage, but starts playing the martyr when he's the target.

All we want him to do is stop playing his music so loud either in the house or the car. That's why the yard work and maintenance isn't brought out until he's in his car with the radio blaring.

He's a renter, but the landlord won't return anyone's calls. So even that method doesn't work.

[kaelor]

Time to reset the automatic sprinklers to a more appropriate time.

Or just run the regular sprinkler with a WIDE dispersal radius.

[Merriweather]

Oh man, that is pure evil and I LOVE IT! Next time I have neighbour issues, I know who to call for creative ideas!

Thank you, glad to be of help I do seem to have a rather devious, inventive mind - I was always the ones friends came to when they needed a believable, creative story to tell someone

I once came up with a plan for a friend doing a surprise party for a very "unfoolable" husband, that involved so many twists (and two hours of pure dramatics on my part, I deserved an oscar for that performance) that he had no clue at all, and was talked about for years.

[ADeMartino]

I've got a bunch of lumber, a battery powered circular saw and drill, and hammers. She needs to repair the front porch and steps, right?

Or to build a coffin for someone.

[Sunshine]

Yep...and he didnt threaten him with it...just held it in his hand...bwahahaha

[PepperElf]

All we want him to do is stop playing his music so loud either in the house or the car. That's why the yard work and maintenance isn't brought out until he's in his car with the radio blaring.

He's a renter, but the landlord won't return anyone's calls. So even that method doesn't work.

I agree - keeping your "retaliations" within the law is the best way to handle things. The last thing you need is to give him a legitimate excuse to call the cops on you.

As for the land lord, I found a rather reasonable article on what to do if the landlord/lady refuses to answer calls.

[Crossbow]

As for the land lord, I found a rather reasonable article on what to do if the landlord/lady refuses to answer calls.

All of the options are great, if it's YOUR landlord. In this case, my friends own their house, and the landlord owns the douchebag neighbor's house.

Now, landlord's parents live directly across the street from my friends, so talking to them is the next step.

[PepperElf]

Ah... no wonder there's issues then. Sounds like the best option then is the police or the local town/county hall etc for noise complaints.


Mom had to do that once on neighbors who were turning their yard into a home for stationary junk cars. We knew the homeowner, but she was renting her house out while she was living in another state... so she wasn't going to be of much help. The county sent a rep down to check it out and... hit them with some citations for having an illegal junk yard, and pretty much made them clean it up.

Can't say this will work for noise exactly but ... it may help if they can get a paper-trail started at least.


Or ... velociraptors!

[protege]

Except that this guy will immediately go to the police screaming racism, harassment and assault. He's quick to call the cops when it's to his advantage, but starts playing the martyr when he's the target.

That's usually how most assholes are. They enjoy being jerks to everyone else...but are quick to bitch when it happens to *them.*

For example, my brother was (and is) an instigator. He loves stirring things up. When we were younger, he'd start shit--either he'd run his mouth, attempt to hit me, and I'd pound him. Then he'd go running to Mom about how I'd "hit [him] for 'no reason.'" Then I'd get in trouble, and would kick his ass again.

Didn't always work though. One summer, he was having 'issues' with someone from school. This guy, was taking piano lessons from our neighbor's daughter. My brother saw him come out of the house, and went over there to confront him. Not much went on--one punch, and my brother was done. That is, he got his ass beat.

Mom came home, he made excuses. Tried to blame me, the kid down the street, etc. The full story came out when she said something to the kid down the street's mother about "that's a nice black eye your kid gave mine." That mother was "what the hell are you talking about? We weren't even home!" The truth came out later, when the piano teacher came over and asked if my brother was OK after getting his ass beat. She'd seen everything, told my mother the truth, and Mom was furious.

What I'm trying to say is, that such people will get what they deserve sooner or later. There's always a bigger gorilla in the forest.

Also, keep in mind that some gorillas choose to fit their pads with cameras. That's why the goofballs that live next door to my parents feel like they can get away with things--if victims choose to retaliate, it's all on film.