We don't trust this doctor...

[Little Retail Rabbit]

I really dislike Dr R at the moment, and I'm also starting to suspect she's kind of a crap doctor. My mother saw her very early on this year regarding the issues that lead to the discovery of a massive fibroid, that in turn lead to her having very unpleasant hormonal therapy in preparation for a hysterectomy (that in turn lead to complications...not Dr R's fault, but was the fault of the hospital). Mum is still experiencing the pain that lead to her going to see Dr R in the first place (I'll come back to that) and we're now getting concerned.

I also had my own experience with Dr R a few years ago...

My Experience- Poor examination, and rude comments

Not to be gross, but this does contain a snippet about my sex life (is relevant) so do feel free to skip if you wish.

I have a clicky hip. My left. It has improved over time, I think mostly down to bellydance, but in karate I always had difficulty executing sideways kicks to the left, and certain positions would cause it pain. Now, I only see my fiance once a year or so, and when i'm with him, pretty much everytime we sleep together, I have a hip problem. Particularly if I'm on top...the pain in my left hip makes it feel like the joint is about to pop right out. Its very painful and a real mood killer, I can tell you I was too embarrassed back then to ask my mum about it, so I decided to see a doctor about it. I usually see Dr M, but I have a nightmare time getting to see any doctor at this surgery (I've bitched about it before) and Dr R is also female, I figured I could see Dr R. It was the first time I had met her.

I explained the problem, and she asked me to take off my trousers and get up on the bed. She first examined my right hip, which was fine. Problem was, I couldn't physically spread my left leg because there was a bloody WALL right there. So Dr R just said "Oh never mind, put your trousers back on." Basically, I got partially undressed and then she couldn't be fucked to examine my hip properly anyway.

I said it was an issue I really wanted to sort out because it was making sex very painful, especially in that particular position. She just said very bluntly "Is your boyfriend fat?" I blinked, stammered and said "Well, he's not a small guy"* and she just quipped "He needs to lose weight then."

That was it.

My Mum's Experience
My mum never really felt "Bob" the fibroid prior to diagnosis...she said he never actually hurt her until treatment began, and she was aware of a...thing there...but it didn't hurt, and because she had had UTIs and the like in the past, she had always assumed it was related to that- especially as nurses and doctors had previously confirmed this also. What mum went to see Dr R about back in February was a very nasty pain more down in her groin area, so painful that she had found it difficult to walk. I remember finding her hobbling about with a contorted expression in Tesco shortly before her appointment, and the day of her appointment, she was in such pain that I had to go and get her to bring her home. Now, we're 12 weeks aftert he surgery now, mum should be pretty much healed. But she's been having to take time off work, her belly is still very swollen and sore...and the pain in her groin is STILL there.

Last week she went back to Dr R, who examined her again, and said there were no lumps or bumps and everything is fine. But mum is still hurting. The night before last, she and my dad went to see a comedian for my dad's birthday, and being sat in the same chair and laughing so much left her in so much pain she couldn't go to work the next day (which explains why she didn't argue when I said I'd clean the bathroom ). She's back at work today, but she's still uncomfortable, and told me last night that when she saw Dr R last, Dr R was going through all the notes on the computer and saying "Oh yes, I saw you earlier this year didn't I? Why didn't I examine that then?" She then paused and said "Oh because you had just had your cervical smear [PAP test] and I thoguht you'd been through enough."

Dear god, it better turn out that this pain is nothing (I suggested maybe it was a nerve, maybe Bob was sitting on a nerve, and its just nerve damage or something)...I will have Dr R's guts for garters if it turns out something else is wrong with mum. A 15cm fibroid is huge, but it also wasn't hurting mum until treatment for it began. She's been through so much this year. She really wants to have another scan, but also have it look at her groin, not just her abdomen.

I always felt (and mum agrees) that Dr R is just not very pleasant, lacking in bedside manner and unable to express a caring attitude (she tries, but it always fails), but now I'm wondering if in addition to that, she's also a shit doctor -_-

[PepperElf]

honestly it's long past time to look for a new doctor

there's nothing wrong in collecting your medical records and finding someone else who treats you better and doesn't ignore your complaints or insult you

[AccountingDrone]

Clicky hip

What you have sounds like FAI. Femoral - Acetabular Impingement is one of my problems. I always referred to it as 'barbie hip' because it felt like that click you get when you manipulate a barbie leg sideways instead of front/back and the ball and socket joint just doesn't move that way. The actual click is the articular cartilage being ticked against a bone spur.

Ignore the dumb bitch and call your PCP and request an orthopedic consult, it isn't anything an OB/GYN can deal with.

[in general if it is a mechanical issue, OBs have not got a freaking clue. If it doesn't pertain to squishing a watermelon out of a tiny hole, they are lost.]

[Andara Bledin]

Wow. What a lackadaisical attitude that woman has about her patient's health.

There is no way I'd ever go back for a second visit with someone that so casually dismissed my concerns.

^-.-^

[TawnyMyst]

I have a similar issue with my hip as well. In my case it's because my pelvis is tipped too far forward. Apparently the pelvis should look like an oval in X-rays and mine looks like a box. Nothing they can do to fix it, I was just told to live with it and find ways to maneuver that it doesn't happen. I call it. "My hip locking", 'cause that's what it feels like.
I second the opinion to find a new doctor ASAP, in general that one just sounds like a b***h.

[Little Retail Rabbit]

My hip is a lot better nowadays. Bellydance uses so much hip movement, but is also low-intensive/low-impact exercise, so it can really improve joint problems. Its not something that bothers me so much now, but back when I saw Dr R about it a few years ago, it was problematic.

I actually told my mum about it for the first time last night (I'm less embarrassed nowadays ^^; and she first she joked "You're being too adventurous!" and then said seriously she has something similar once in a while, its not a big deal, and she imagines the fact I don't see my fiance very often (like I said, once a year) means my body doesn't get a chance to get used to it.

At the moment its my mum I am most worried about. On one hand, I feel bad for her...she has had a bloody rotten year and on the other, I worry for her health and wellbeing. My mind goes off into dark places when its worried, and I just hope there is nothing serious that has been overlooked.

I have not seen Dr R since, since I found her comment about my fiance very rude (he gave me the most horrendous comeback that I wish I had thought of at the time XD). I usually only see Dr M, who is much nicer. In honesty, I rarely see the doctor. Its rare I bother going, and if I do need to, sometimes I still don't get to because one of the receptionists is an unhelpful bitch who won't help. Back when mum was hurting in February, her first attempt was basically turned down by Bitch Receptionist who just didn't believe my mum was in "that much pain" if she was going to work still. Later, when the doctor did see her, one of her primary concerns was that it was a ruptured ovarian cyst

(As we know, it wasn't, it was Bob, but as the point I'm making is the receptionist is a cowbag).

I am pretty much giving my surgery its last chances. Last few times I had seen the doctor, it was Dr M, so I have nothing to complain about, thankfully. Lets see what I think this time next week. I'm booked for my first smear/PAP test, and, naturally, I'm not happy about it at all, but I know I have to. I'm sure its going to be fine (mum said her last one was fine, and the nurse was nice), but if turns out to be an absolutely awful experience, I am going to scream before moving doctors. I'd rather not move if we could, being as about 10 years ago we moved to these doctors (the last was even worse >.< ).

[Andara Bledin]

Have you discussed your concerns about Receptionist Bitch and Doctor Dismissive with anyone who has the power to enforce some sort of corrective action?

The fact that the receptionist turned your mother away despite the fact that she had a legitimate medical concern is frightening and I can't imagine that it doesn't open the entire group up to some major legal liability.

^-.-^

[Seshat]

I have a similar issue with my hip as well. In my case it's because my pelvis is tipped too far forward. Apparently the pelvis should look like an oval in X-rays and mine looks like a box. Nothing they can do to fix it,

It depends. If your pelvis is positioned that way because of bone layout, the only possible 'fix' would include bone surgery - something to be low on the list of options. And not being a bone surgeon, nor having seen your X-rays, I can't say whether it's possible in the first place. (Hey, I have a cousin who's a bone surgeon....)*

However, if your pelvis positioning is even partly a matter of muscle tensions and how the muscles are 'holding' your body; a combination of massage, conscious relaxation, and corset muscle exercises should gradually and gently reseat your pelvis to something closer to where it should be.

The massage and the conscious relaxation will loosen whichever muscles are over-tight. Corset muscle exercises will strengthen whichever muscles are not strong enough.

For this purpose, as muscle exercises, I would actually recommend bellydance. Find a dance teacher whose interest is in helping people have fun, or have fun and strengthen their bodies, rather than one who wants to win competitions.
One who's focussed on competition is going to be pushing you for better 'form', and thus trying to make you force your pelvis into position. What we're after here is just strengthening the muscles and letting them do the work all on their own.
Just bellydancing for fun and exercise will strengthen all sorts of corset muscles you didn't even know existed. Even if your pelvis tilt doesn't correct, I've never yet found anyone medical who said strong corset muscles are a bad thing.

* he's also a psychiatrist, and looking him up just now on google, I've found out he's now an assistant neurosurgeon. Yes, he's the family overachiever. He's also climbed Everest.**
** Yes, it sucked to grow up in his shadow. I was frequently told how alike we were.

[Lyse]

LRR - at this point I think you would be better off looking for a new doctor. Even *if* your current doctor were competent and caring, when it gets to the point that a patient questions whether to trust their doctor it's time to find another one. That relationship requires too much trust and respect on both sides.

[Little Retail Rabbit]

Bellydance rocks The first class I joined, 80% of the class were old age pensioners who had been recommended the exercise by their doctors, being as its so low-impact. I've had to give up for a while because there weren't enough numbers to carry on the class I was in () but when I was last talking to my teacher she was saying how she sees a significant change in my posture, even in when I walk now. I now tilt my pelvis up a little, straightening my back and taking the pressure off my lower back without barely thinking about it. My teacher only really cared about sharing the dance and having a good time, I worked hard because I want to be good at it, but the classes also had a great atmosphere, and if you messed up, you'd all just have a giggle and move on

I wouldn't know where to start in finding a new doctor. I would rather stick with Dr M because she knows about my anxieties and I would hate to have to take all that time to get used to a doctor all over again. Dr M is very understanding about that kind of thing (there are 3 doctors, Dr M, Dr P-R, who is Dr R's husband, and Dr R. Dr P-R is ok, I've seen him for ear infections and things that aren't too personal, and would happily see him, he's got a good manner and seems professional enough.

As for the receptionists, the is one who is an utter dragon, and it does make it very difficult to get appointments. My dad says he never has a problem, but he only ever needs to see a nurse, usually first thing in the morning, for an ear syringe, a couple of weeks in advance. My mum and I however usually only need to see the doctor when we are sick right NOW, and its a nightmare. One time I was crying from pain of an ear infection and kept being told by the dragon to keep calling back, I only got an appointment in the end because a new receptionist felt sorry for me and pulled some strings.

I was elected for a GP's survey earlier this year, and I ripped the shit out of my surgery, particularly the receptionists. But other than that, I'm not sure who to complain to. We don't even know who the receptionist is, this only ever happens on the phone, and we have no idea what her name is or what she looks like. I may speak to mum about moving surgeries, but like I said, I have no idea who we'd move to; we've already moved once, and I don't know what other doctor's surgeries there are in my town (we won't be able to register with one out of our area, you're not allowed to). Dad will no doubt think its stupid, but then he's never been really ill and needed any a doctor urgently.

[Andara Bledin]

The person to complain to is the doctor you finally get the appointment with when the dragon is holding the phones. After you get past her, make a point of telling the doctor how difficult it was to get an appointment at all and how many times you had to call, and how badly she stonewalled you, and how she acted like your problem couldn't possibly be anything serious so you should just suck it up and go away.

The doctor will know how to track down who set up the appointment.

As for Dr R, have you discussed with Dr M about how uninterested she is in actually diagnosing anything? Seriously, you went in with a complaint and she had you lie the wrong way on a table and when it was discovered hat she couldn't do the examination in that position, she just blew it off. That is unacceptable by any standard.

^-.-^