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(warning, language - as per my usual)
Ugh...another day of tech support for satellite TV - the job that could turn Mother Theresa into a ravening, anti-social people hater... What would Jesus do? HE'D QUIT!
First, a snippet:
Dear Mr. Grouchy Ass:
If I spend forty minutes helping you get your receiver connected to the internet, and I actually fix your issue, where do you get off giving me an attitude? I made it work and all you can do is whimper about how hard it was. Yes, we had to reset your router twice. You know why? It's a fucking DLINK*. In other words, you could have a three year old tape some wires to a little cardboard box and superglue M&Ms to stand in for buttons, and it would probably work better then that piece of crap. Your cheap POS equipment is not my problem, has nothing to do with your satellite equipment, and I've been far more accommodating then most agents would be. Two words, eight letters: THANK YOU. You can say it with sincerity, it doesn't hurt, I promise!
*sorry if you love your Dlink equipment. I've had nothing but problems with them, ever.
My Mother, the Doormat
This lady was not near cool enough to deserve the Harry Potter reference in the thread title.
So she calls up with a satellite issue on one of her receivers in the home. Every other TV works fine; it's just this one. Normally this is a cabling problem so I have her check the satellite cable. She's perfectly pleasant but gets strangely nervous when I ask her to do this.
Customer: "Oh...check the cable? Um...oh dear...yes, let me try...'
*thud* *crash* *thud* *sounds of objects falling*
Several minutes later, she comes back on the line, all out of breath as if she's just struggled up Mt. Everest
C: "I checked it!" *pant* "It's on as tight as it can be!"
MG5(me): "In that case, you're going to need a service call. This is completely covered for you, no charge at all, and we can come out tomorrow."
C: "....Is that really necessary?"
MG5:
"Um...if you want your TV to work, it is."
C: *nervous giggle* "Oh, well...I suppose...but the tech won't need access to this particular television, will he?"
MG5: "You mean, the only television in the house that's not working? Let me see - why, I believe that is a HELL YES followed by a resounding DUH." (I'm paraphrasing
)
C: "Oh...' *giggle* "Well, you see, this TV's in little Timmy's room,'(I heard little Timmy in the background, sounds like he's about ten or so) '...and I'm afraid it's just a little bit messy."
MG5: *recalling sounds of struggle akin to mess the size of aforementioned Mt. Everest* "A...little bit messy, you say?"
C: *giggle* "I'm afraid that he won't be able to get into the room. He'll just have to fix it from outside."
MG5: "Um...NO. I'm sorry, but it's critical that we be able to get to the receiver and service it." (So...now you're going to tell little Timmy to clean his room, right?)
C: "Oh, well...the technician come just climb over the bed, I suppose."
MG5:
"Um...again....NO. Ma'am, the technician really needs clear access to the receiver. He can't service it otherwise. If tomorrow is too soon, I can reschedule - " (So now you're going to tell Little Timmy to clean his fucking room, right?!)
C: "Oh, no, don't do that! Little Timmy really needs his TV right away! I think the technician will be able to manage it, I'm sure! He can just clear a little path!"
MG5: *inarticulate choking noises as I force myself to not demand that she put her little brat on the line so -I- can tell him to clean his goddamn room if he ever wants to see Spongebob again*
C: "Great, thanks then! We'll be waiting!" *hangs up*
MG5: *flails wordlessly*
OK, now I have three kids, and believe me, my two boys have rooms of intense mass destruction and various biological hazards. I get it, I do. I have better things to do then have a three hour battle every day to get them to clean it. They shut their doors and I try to pretend the mess doesn't exist. BUT if my little preciouses were allowed TVs in their rooms (they aren't), AND we needed a tech to fix it, I wouldn't even call for the appointment until they cleaned up. It's as simple as that - you want your TV fixed, clean your room. If you don't, it stays broken.
My mind was just boggled at the way that she wouldn't even CONSIDER asking her darling boy to clean up his own mess. I hope the tech refuses to service the equipment on the grounds of safety issues. Of course, then she'll probably clean it herself.
Way to teach personal responsibility, Mom!
Ugh...another day of tech support for satellite TV - the job that could turn Mother Theresa into a ravening, anti-social people hater... What would Jesus do? HE'D QUIT!
First, a snippet:
Dear Mr. Grouchy Ass:
If I spend forty minutes helping you get your receiver connected to the internet, and I actually fix your issue, where do you get off giving me an attitude? I made it work and all you can do is whimper about how hard it was. Yes, we had to reset your router twice. You know why? It's a fucking DLINK*. In other words, you could have a three year old tape some wires to a little cardboard box and superglue M&Ms to stand in for buttons, and it would probably work better then that piece of crap. Your cheap POS equipment is not my problem, has nothing to do with your satellite equipment, and I've been far more accommodating then most agents would be. Two words, eight letters: THANK YOU. You can say it with sincerity, it doesn't hurt, I promise!
*sorry if you love your Dlink equipment. I've had nothing but problems with them, ever.
My Mother, the Doormat
This lady was not near cool enough to deserve the Harry Potter reference in the thread title.
So she calls up with a satellite issue on one of her receivers in the home. Every other TV works fine; it's just this one. Normally this is a cabling problem so I have her check the satellite cable. She's perfectly pleasant but gets strangely nervous when I ask her to do this.
Customer: "Oh...check the cable? Um...oh dear...yes, let me try...'
*thud* *crash* *thud* *sounds of objects falling*
Several minutes later, she comes back on the line, all out of breath as if she's just struggled up Mt. Everest
C: "I checked it!" *pant* "It's on as tight as it can be!"
MG5(me): "In that case, you're going to need a service call. This is completely covered for you, no charge at all, and we can come out tomorrow."
C: "....Is that really necessary?"
MG5:
"Um...if you want your TV to work, it is."C: *nervous giggle* "Oh, well...I suppose...but the tech won't need access to this particular television, will he?"
MG5: "You mean, the only television in the house that's not working? Let me see - why, I believe that is a HELL YES followed by a resounding DUH." (I'm paraphrasing
)C: "Oh...' *giggle* "Well, you see, this TV's in little Timmy's room,'(I heard little Timmy in the background, sounds like he's about ten or so) '...and I'm afraid it's just a little bit messy."
MG5: *recalling sounds of struggle akin to mess the size of aforementioned Mt. Everest* "A...little bit messy, you say?"
C: *giggle* "I'm afraid that he won't be able to get into the room. He'll just have to fix it from outside."
MG5: "Um...NO. I'm sorry, but it's critical that we be able to get to the receiver and service it." (So...now you're going to tell little Timmy to clean his room, right?)
C: "Oh, well...the technician come just climb over the bed, I suppose."
MG5:
"Um...again....NO. Ma'am, the technician really needs clear access to the receiver. He can't service it otherwise. If tomorrow is too soon, I can reschedule - " (So now you're going to tell Little Timmy to clean his fucking room, right?!)C: "Oh, no, don't do that! Little Timmy really needs his TV right away! I think the technician will be able to manage it, I'm sure! He can just clear a little path!"
MG5: *inarticulate choking noises as I force myself to not demand that she put her little brat on the line so -I- can tell him to clean his goddamn room if he ever wants to see Spongebob again*
C: "Great, thanks then! We'll be waiting!" *hangs up*
MG5: *flails wordlessly*
OK, now I have three kids, and believe me, my two boys have rooms of intense mass destruction and various biological hazards. I get it, I do. I have better things to do then have a three hour battle every day to get them to clean it. They shut their doors and I try to pretend the mess doesn't exist. BUT if my little preciouses were allowed TVs in their rooms (they aren't), AND we needed a tech to fix it, I wouldn't even call for the appointment until they cleaned up. It's as simple as that - you want your TV fixed, clean your room. If you don't, it stays broken.
My mind was just boggled at the way that she wouldn't even CONSIDER asking her darling boy to clean up his own mess. I hope the tech refuses to service the equipment on the grounds of safety issues. Of course, then she'll probably clean it herself.
Way to teach personal responsibility, Mom!
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