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Another day at a large electronics chain. It's the middle of summer, 2001, the sun in shining, the air is warm, and a very dapper-looking gentleman is checking out. Dressed to the nines, his clean, sharp business suit seems more suited to a business luncheon with impotant clientele than a trip to buy a DVD, but who am I to judge? He only stood out because you rarely see someone dressed up like that in a place like this.
From my vantage point in the entertainment section I notice a commotion brewing at the checkout. The dapper dude is arguing with the cashier; apparently, he was being accused of stealing DVDs, and the fellow took deep offence to such slander. Ordinarily our policy is not to confront in the store, but this was a special circumstance, as unfortunately for him, when asked to empty the contents of his suit jacket's pockets, he was caught in the lie, as there were some loose DVDs, freshly extracted from their cases, which staff in the entertainment department found stuffed down the sides of one of the couches there.
Needless to say, his tune quickly changed from "Who Do You Think You Are?" to "Please release me." After all, he pleaded, he hadn't actually left the store, so technically he hasn't even really stolen it yet, right? Right? Hello? Yeah, no, it doesn't work that way, not leastwise because he's already destroyed the packaging and security seals, rendering them unsaleable. He's detained and brought to the staff room to be held there while the police arrive, which they do in due course. They must have been in there questioning him for 20 minutes at least before he was given the perp walk out the front doors.
It turns out he was detained at the front because we'd received a tip about him from the store next door. That store Being Moores. Moores sells suits. Yeah, he didn't pay for that, either.
From my vantage point in the entertainment section I notice a commotion brewing at the checkout. The dapper dude is arguing with the cashier; apparently, he was being accused of stealing DVDs, and the fellow took deep offence to such slander. Ordinarily our policy is not to confront in the store, but this was a special circumstance, as unfortunately for him, when asked to empty the contents of his suit jacket's pockets, he was caught in the lie, as there were some loose DVDs, freshly extracted from their cases, which staff in the entertainment department found stuffed down the sides of one of the couches there.
Needless to say, his tune quickly changed from "Who Do You Think You Are?" to "Please release me." After all, he pleaded, he hadn't actually left the store, so technically he hasn't even really stolen it yet, right? Right? Hello? Yeah, no, it doesn't work that way, not leastwise because he's already destroyed the packaging and security seals, rendering them unsaleable. He's detained and brought to the staff room to be held there while the police arrive, which they do in due course. They must have been in there questioning him for 20 minutes at least before he was given the perp walk out the front doors.
It turns out he was detained at the front because we'd received a tip about him from the store next door. That store Being Moores. Moores sells suits. Yeah, he didn't pay for that, either.
That is awesome. So when should we expect to see this guy on Cops or World's Dumbest Criminals?
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