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Here's one that my dad told me ages ago...
There were three shy boys, who lived with their mother. They kept to themselves, and rarely ventured into the outside world. Time went by, and the boys all grew up, but never overcame their shyness, and never moved into homes of their own.
One day, their mother decides she's going to cure them once and for all. She wakes them up early on a Sunday morning, and takes them shopping for new suits and shoes. The whole time, they're looking all around at everyone else nervously, but she drags them along.
Once their done shopping, and everyone is in their nice new clothing, she drags them off to church, and they all sit in the front row. As before, the boys are all nervous as anything.
To make matters worse, the minister at this particular church likes to stop in the middle of the sermon every so often, and pick out a random person and ask questions about what he just said, just to make sure people are paying attention.
The three shy boys are looking around nervously, as the minister is talking about the Great Creator. Suddenly, he turns to the first shy boy, points at him, and loudly asks, "And who is the Great Creator?"
The boy shrinks back timidly, unable to say a word. His mother pulls out a six-inch hatpin and jabs him in the ass with it. The boy jumps up, and screams, "MY GOD!"
"That's right!", says the minister. He then goes on to talk about the son of God. Suddenly, he turns to the second shy boy, points at him, and loudly asks, "And who is the son of God?"
The boy shinks bad timidly, just like his brother did. His mother pulls out the hatpin again, and jabs him with it. The boy jumps up, and screams, "JESUS CHRIST!"
"That's right!", says the minister. He then starts talking about Adam and Eve, and the Garden of Eden. Suddenly, he turns to the third shy boy, points to him, and loudly asks, "And what was the first thing Eve said to Adam?"
The mother gets out the hatpin again, but the third boy is a little quicker than his brothers. Before she can jab him with it, he jumps up and yells, "IF YOU STICK ME WITH THAT LONG, POINTY THING, I'M GONNA BREAK IT!"
There were three shy boys, who lived with their mother. They kept to themselves, and rarely ventured into the outside world. Time went by, and the boys all grew up, but never overcame their shyness, and never moved into homes of their own.
One day, their mother decides she's going to cure them once and for all. She wakes them up early on a Sunday morning, and takes them shopping for new suits and shoes. The whole time, they're looking all around at everyone else nervously, but she drags them along.
Once their done shopping, and everyone is in their nice new clothing, she drags them off to church, and they all sit in the front row. As before, the boys are all nervous as anything.
To make matters worse, the minister at this particular church likes to stop in the middle of the sermon every so often, and pick out a random person and ask questions about what he just said, just to make sure people are paying attention.
The three shy boys are looking around nervously, as the minister is talking about the Great Creator. Suddenly, he turns to the first shy boy, points at him, and loudly asks, "And who is the Great Creator?"
The boy shrinks back timidly, unable to say a word. His mother pulls out a six-inch hatpin and jabs him in the ass with it. The boy jumps up, and screams, "MY GOD!"
"That's right!", says the minister. He then goes on to talk about the son of God. Suddenly, he turns to the second shy boy, points at him, and loudly asks, "And who is the son of God?"
The boy shinks bad timidly, just like his brother did. His mother pulls out the hatpin again, and jabs him with it. The boy jumps up, and screams, "JESUS CHRIST!"
"That's right!", says the minister. He then starts talking about Adam and Eve, and the Garden of Eden. Suddenly, he turns to the third shy boy, points to him, and loudly asks, "And what was the first thing Eve said to Adam?"
The mother gets out the hatpin again, but the third boy is a little quicker than his brothers. Before she can jab him with it, he jumps up and yells, "IF YOU STICK ME WITH THAT LONG, POINTY THING, I'M GONNA BREAK IT!"