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Four words NEVER to use at work

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  • Four words NEVER to use at work

    If ever something isn't going according to plan, never ever ever ever ever ever (repeat ad naseum) say the phrase "it could be worse"
    One of my coworkers said that during shift change... oh yeah, I clocked out fast and booked it.
    Background, at 3am on my shift the switchboard interface failed... this means no automated wake-up calls, no call transfers, and well, none of the functions on the front desk phone. Now, fortunately room to room calls still work, as well as room to outside and outside to switchboard. So, using our cordless phone we can place room to room style calls to manually do the wake-up calls, use it as a room style phone to call outside the hotel, and there is a function on it that forces the switchboard to transfer an incoming call to it (the switchboard phone still would ring, couldn't answer it though, just had to use the force answer on the cordless).
    So, it's bad, but not overcomable... while I'm explaining this to the morning shift girl, she says the dreaded words "well, that's not bad... it could be worse"
    As I'm heading out I hear the 911 call alarm go off.
    Once the 911 call alarm goes off, we cannot send or recieve calls until the switchboard is reset... of course using the interface at the front desk which is completely down. So, I'm sure you see where this is going. No inbound calls, no outbound calls, only thing that is working is direct room to room calls.
    So dear coworker, you have learned the workplace rule number one... say it could be worse, and it WILL be worse.
    If you wish to find meaning, listen to the music not the song

  • #2
    Don't forget the other 4 words you should never use, especially in a bar/restaurant establishment..

    "Isn't it quiet today"

    Those words had me running for the hills screaming as you could guarantee the world & its mother would then proceed to walk through the door

    Bonus points if it was said when you were already short staffed & were thankful it was quietish, as it usually was in my kitchen... total staff me 90% of the time
    Arp happens!

    Just when I was getting used to yesterday, along came today.

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    • #3
      My motto, all through high school, was "Cheer up! Enjoy it while it lasts! Because it WILL get worse!"

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      • #4
        Quoth Cazzi View Post
        "Isn't it quiet today"

        "No bar rush tonight"

        "I'm glad its slow"

        "Cleaning is done early!"

        Thou shalt not take the name of thy goddess Whiskey in vain.

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        • #5
          It's quiet this weekend= rush on last minute calls or girls quitting, or both.
          I'm the 5th horsemen of the apocalypse. Bringer of giggly bouncy doom, they don't talk about me much.

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          • #6
            Right before closing:

            We are almost done!

            That's when someone will call or walk in with an emergency.

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            • #7
              As I'm walking in the door/entering the break room/punching in/going down to start work:

              "Thank goodness you're here!"

              This invariably means "We've been busy as fuck, and you will be too."
              Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. Study hard. Be evil.

              "I never said I wasn't a horrible person."--Me, almost daily

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              • #8
                "looks like we'll be getting out early tonight."
                "If we refund your money, give you a free replacement and shoot the manager, then will you be happy?" - sign seen in a restaurant

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                • #9
                  "hrm. no major server crashes. May get out of here early today."

                  less than 5 minutes after that was said, a breaker popped and took out about 40 servers. It took 3 hours to get everything back online. I was just leaving as the servers crashed. I worked a 13 hour day that day, and I wasn't happy.
                  Coworker: Distro of choice?
                  Me: Gentoo.
                  Coworker: Ahh. A Masochist. I thought so.

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                  • #10
                    "hm. mall sure is empty today!"

                    never fails. someone either in my store or a neighboring one says that, then the buses from specialville come and drop off their passengers. ugh.
                    If you want to be happy, be. ~Leo Tolstoy

                    i'm on fb and xbox live; pm me if ya wanna be "friends"
                    ^_^

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                    • #11
                      "Smile, " they said, "it could be worse"

                      So I smiled, and it was

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                      • #12
                        Quoth Cazzi View Post
                        Don't forget the other 4 words you should never use, especially in a bar/restaurant establishment..

                        "Isn't it quiet today"
                        This is also a no-no in the emergency department...

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                        • #13
                          "Gee, I haven't seen the trouble-makers come in today"

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                          • #14
                            "Nothing's been stolen yet!" - Yup, now I'm waiting for something that I've just done or planted in the front yard to get ruined.
                            Don't tempt pixies, it never ends well.

                            Avatar created by the lovely Eisa.

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                            • #15
                              I dunno, I've used "It could be worse" or "It's quiet here today" many times with no ill effects.
                              Success is not final, failure is not fatal: It is the courage to continue that counts.-Winston Churchill

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