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Patient 1: Man in his mid-30's sporting that oh-so-hip urban look wherein one wears one's pants halfway between one's waist and one's knees, to better show off one's fancy boxer shorts, and thereby forcing one to hold up one's pants with one's hand, lest one's pants drop to one's ankles.
This man had been brought in and was hooked up to a heart monitor, but at some point in the process he needed to use the bathroom, so he unhooked himself and off he went, holding up his pants and trailing the cord behind him. Rasta Nurse thought this was suspicious, and in fact thought the patient might be trying to escape.
He stopped the man and asked him where he was going, and when told it was only the bathroom, he told the man to carry the cord so that he, nor anyone else, would trip.
The man let go of his pants to pick up the cord, and his pants immediately dropped to his ankles. Now, with a decision to make, he decided to hold his pants up and went waddling off toward the bathroom again. Rasta Nurse told him again to carry the cord.
The response: "Then how'm I hol' up my pants, son?"
Rasta Nurse reports that there is no proper response to a question this stupid, and so he just turned and walked away.
Patient 2: Teenage girl is brought in. Rasta Nurse is to be her nurse for the night and goes in, introduces himself and asks her the fateful question.
"What brought you in tonight?"
"My church group," she answered.
Thinking perhaps she misheard and thought he had asked who had brought her in, he tried again.
"What are you doing here tonight?"
"We're on vacation," she said.
He checked her chart and saw a likely reason for coming to a hospital, and good thing -- because had he tried yet again and perhaps asked, "Why are you here?", her response would undoubtedly have been something like, "We drove a car up to the doors and they pushed me inside."
These were both from the same night, and not only that, these were not the only stupid patients to be seen last night... Unfortunately, the really good one would involve spilling some medical beans, which I can't do. Trust me though -- it was funny.
This man had been brought in and was hooked up to a heart monitor, but at some point in the process he needed to use the bathroom, so he unhooked himself and off he went, holding up his pants and trailing the cord behind him. Rasta Nurse thought this was suspicious, and in fact thought the patient might be trying to escape.
He stopped the man and asked him where he was going, and when told it was only the bathroom, he told the man to carry the cord so that he, nor anyone else, would trip.
The man let go of his pants to pick up the cord, and his pants immediately dropped to his ankles. Now, with a decision to make, he decided to hold his pants up and went waddling off toward the bathroom again. Rasta Nurse told him again to carry the cord.
The response: "Then how'm I hol' up my pants, son?"
Rasta Nurse reports that there is no proper response to a question this stupid, and so he just turned and walked away.
Patient 2: Teenage girl is brought in. Rasta Nurse is to be her nurse for the night and goes in, introduces himself and asks her the fateful question.
"What brought you in tonight?"
"My church group," she answered.
Thinking perhaps she misheard and thought he had asked who had brought her in, he tried again.
"What are you doing here tonight?"
"We're on vacation," she said.
He checked her chart and saw a likely reason for coming to a hospital, and good thing -- because had he tried yet again and perhaps asked, "Why are you here?", her response would undoubtedly have been something like, "We drove a car up to the doors and they pushed me inside."
These were both from the same night, and not only that, these were not the only stupid patients to be seen last night... Unfortunately, the really good one would involve spilling some medical beans, which I can't do. Trust me though -- it was funny.
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