I have been retail zombie slaying for years now but I still have yet to find the source and slay the capitalist demon that spawns the nightmare every day.
Today I venture forth into the cursed landscape armed with the mighty whip named tech knowledge and my trusty dagger named experience to slay the droving hordes of undead customers that plague the local villagers.
All seems quiet at first and the sky is gray warning of rain that may slow the horde but alas it never arrives until long in the night when the curse will already be lifted.
My comrade has been patrolling the area on his own for the last hour to best dispose of the roaming dead and allowing the cashiers to finish them off and dispose of the remains. There is not many and all seems well. I take a moment for me and my comrade to bring each other up to speed on the current state of the stronghold. However something is not right and slowly more and more undead seem to spring from the ground. They lumber towards me with cries of printer ink and usb cables, arms outstretched ready to attack if I do not fend them off with what they seek. At first I manage well and keep the rising tide of undead at bay but more and more begin to rise, in groups they approach soon while battling one I begin to see them gather to pounce as soon as the battle is complete.
I do my best to handle as many as quickly as possible passing the weaker undead to my less trained comrades who can at least fetch the necessary subweapons to fend them off I only hope they don't run out of hearts.
When another comrade arrives to defend our section of the fortress the two of us that have been on take advantage of this in turn to each grab a moment's respite while we refill our battle weary bodies, there is not time for sleep but the ale from the metal obelisk that takes our coins and the sandwiches from the sandwich shop next door will hopefully sustain us. However we dare not abandon each other for long for fear of being overwhelmed. Together the three of us make progress I am able to handle some tougher enemies, the midlevel boss of a camera sale rears its head multiple times throughout the day but is quickly handled each time. The printer sale creature does not make much of an appearance but the few times it does I handle it as I am the foremost printer sale slayer in the land.
Unfortunately my comrade from the morning has been forced to retreat for another day and leaves just the two of us to defend the tech wall. While we struggle for a while grabbing moments of rest where possible we must deal with the dissatisfied customer that seeks their computer purchased yesterday that does not have the work completed. Deflected to monday these beasts shall wait for later to be slain.
What is this dreaded noise my ears hear, it grows louder near the kobos, someone has triggered the magical trap surrounding the mystical tablets to signal their attempted tampering and it has managed to scare off the offender but now I must endure the alarm until the regent can disenchant and reenchant the case.
It's a hard road but we seem to be defending the fortress well and making progress,
when the dreaded stage boss, computer sale appears. "Oh fuck" I exclaim as I dive in head first and do my best to battle with the seven headed beast that turns lesser men to stone. I am battling well but honestly I do not remember everything as it happened fast and I think it damaged my sanity. However at the final part of the battle the monster out of fear plays the special ability of bank problems and delays the battle until it can rest more. Little does it know I will be ready this time.
Night time is approaching and honestly though I dread it I must abandon my comrade to defend the wall himself, but the tide is reduced and he must only hold out for another hour until the closing time has vanquished the horrible day.
Today was treacherous many more undead than usual, too many really for the defenders present, even on the most feared day of december 26th is it not this bad as more defenders are present to hold the line.
So how was your day?
Today I venture forth into the cursed landscape armed with the mighty whip named tech knowledge and my trusty dagger named experience to slay the droving hordes of undead customers that plague the local villagers.
All seems quiet at first and the sky is gray warning of rain that may slow the horde but alas it never arrives until long in the night when the curse will already be lifted.
My comrade has been patrolling the area on his own for the last hour to best dispose of the roaming dead and allowing the cashiers to finish them off and dispose of the remains. There is not many and all seems well. I take a moment for me and my comrade to bring each other up to speed on the current state of the stronghold. However something is not right and slowly more and more undead seem to spring from the ground. They lumber towards me with cries of printer ink and usb cables, arms outstretched ready to attack if I do not fend them off with what they seek. At first I manage well and keep the rising tide of undead at bay but more and more begin to rise, in groups they approach soon while battling one I begin to see them gather to pounce as soon as the battle is complete.
I do my best to handle as many as quickly as possible passing the weaker undead to my less trained comrades who can at least fetch the necessary subweapons to fend them off I only hope they don't run out of hearts.
When another comrade arrives to defend our section of the fortress the two of us that have been on take advantage of this in turn to each grab a moment's respite while we refill our battle weary bodies, there is not time for sleep but the ale from the metal obelisk that takes our coins and the sandwiches from the sandwich shop next door will hopefully sustain us. However we dare not abandon each other for long for fear of being overwhelmed. Together the three of us make progress I am able to handle some tougher enemies, the midlevel boss of a camera sale rears its head multiple times throughout the day but is quickly handled each time. The printer sale creature does not make much of an appearance but the few times it does I handle it as I am the foremost printer sale slayer in the land.
Unfortunately my comrade from the morning has been forced to retreat for another day and leaves just the two of us to defend the tech wall. While we struggle for a while grabbing moments of rest where possible we must deal with the dissatisfied customer that seeks their computer purchased yesterday that does not have the work completed. Deflected to monday these beasts shall wait for later to be slain.
What is this dreaded noise my ears hear, it grows louder near the kobos, someone has triggered the magical trap surrounding the mystical tablets to signal their attempted tampering and it has managed to scare off the offender but now I must endure the alarm until the regent can disenchant and reenchant the case.
It's a hard road but we seem to be defending the fortress well and making progress,
when the dreaded stage boss, computer sale appears. "Oh fuck" I exclaim as I dive in head first and do my best to battle with the seven headed beast that turns lesser men to stone. I am battling well but honestly I do not remember everything as it happened fast and I think it damaged my sanity. However at the final part of the battle the monster out of fear plays the special ability of bank problems and delays the battle until it can rest more. Little does it know I will be ready this time.
Night time is approaching and honestly though I dread it I must abandon my comrade to defend the wall himself, but the tide is reduced and he must only hold out for another hour until the closing time has vanquished the horrible day.
Today was treacherous many more undead than usual, too many really for the defenders present, even on the most feared day of december 26th is it not this bad as more defenders are present to hold the line.
So how was your day?
Comment