Weird dude from last night

Amalthea · #1 10-30-2006, 04:19 AM

Okay, I gotta get this posted because I told my co-worker I was going to and she's probably anxious to add her side of the story, so here we go.

Last night I was manning the customer service desk, and had a guy come up and ask me for a book. First off, his information was COMPLETELY wrong. This happens quite frequently. A customer will ask for a book called "I Carried the Candle", when what they really want is "I Capture the Castle". Then they say "Well, I was close!" Okay, not only are we NOT playing horseshoes, but on what planet are those two titles close enough for anyone who hasn't worked at a bookstore for FAR too long and happens to know that there is a book by that second title? ::huff::

Anyhow, he asks for "99 Tips and Tricks for Business" by Leo Lownden. What I eventually found in my computer was "Talking the Winner's Way: 92 Little Tricks for Big Success in Business and Personal Relationships" by Leil Lowndes. The whole time I'm looking for the book and telling him what information I'm finding he's cracking stupid jokes. You know the type. He tries to twist everything I say with some "snappy" comeback that is just absolutely moronic. For example, once I finally find the book but discover we don't have it in stock, I offer to order it in. He then asks "Sure. How are you going to pay for it?" WTF? And then I go to order, and ask for his phone number (to call him when the book is in, duh), and, with a mock look of horror, he says "What? I don't even know you! And look, you're even married!" Har dee har har. I'm almost getting a headache talking to this guy because it's hard to figure out when he's serious and when he isn't, and I'm having to ask him questions 3 times to get a straight answer, cuz the first 2 times he's gotta throw out his verbal barbs. So I've spent about 10 minutes with this guy, first having a hard time finding the book he wants, then having to jump through his stupid verbal hoops trying to determine if he actually wants me to order this stupid thing in, then dealing with his crap as I try to get his info to order it in. Finally I have this done, and in relief I ask if there is anything else I can help him with. He says "Well, what I really need is to get into some trouble. Do you know anywhere around here where I can get into some trouble?" And I say, "Sorry, sorry, I can't help you with that." And he laughs cuz he is SO funny. My manager came over after he left, and said she'd heard the whole thing and had been trying not to laugh, and she thought I'd done an admirable job putting up with him.

But this is not the end. Oh no. Next he goes up to the cashier and proceeds to bug her. I'll let her elaborate on that, if she cares to. Some of what he did was ask her if the ring she wore meant she was spoken for, trying to find out how old she was, and trying to get her number.

THEN he went to the cafe. First he harassed the cafe workers about finding something that didn't have corn syrup in it. And when they weren't sure what did and didn't have corn syrup, he made fun of them, saying they must have only worked there for 3 days. Then he was asking them about the cashier, asking how old she was. Then he made some comment about "Wow, there sure are a lot of young girls who work here..."

(Seems kinda pervy to me...)

Now he's got his book, and his non-corn-syrup drink. Does he leave? No. He comes BACK to the Customer Service desk. Me and the other manager of the night (not the one who'd already heard him babble on) are there, discussing something. So he comes up to the desk, and the manager asks if she can help him. He says "Well, you didn't have the book I was looking for, so I guess I'm going to have to find something else to do with myself for the rest of the night." She then asks, "Is there another book we can find for you?" At this point I quickly duck out of the Customer Service desk, not wanting to get pulled into another excruciating conversation with him. When I come back, I discover he asked my manager where some good clubs were in the area. She told him she didn't know. He asked why she didn't know. She said she didn't go to clubs. He asked why she didn't go to clubs, was she married? Um, don't you think that's a little personal? So, anyway, creepy dude made the rounds last night. We were glad to see the last of him, for sure.

Rapscallion · #2 10-30-2006, 09:03 AM

If he starts kickng up a fuss and claiming to be HCFS intolerant (High Corn Fructose Sugar, or something like that), call him on his bullshit.

Fact: that intolerance is lethal by the age of two or three if not diagnosed.

Fact: it requires invasive surgery to confirm the diagnosis. (Live or kidney samples, I think).

Fact: there are no medically verified cases of the condition occurring after birth.

I've dealt with a couple of cases of that so far...

Other than that, sounds like you had a sleazebag in there.

Rapscallion

Pagan · #3 10-30-2006, 09:34 AM

Quote:

Quoth Amalthea

So, anyway, creepy dude made the rounds last night. We were glad to see the last of him, for sure.

Uh, I hate to remind you, but he's gotta come back and get the book he ordered.

I sincerely hope, for your sake, he never does!

Kogarashi · #4 10-30-2006, 07:36 PM

Oooh, good luck with that!

Worst I've had is two Creepy Old Men complimenting me on my looks ("How are you today sir?" "My day's as good as my cashier is beautiful" is a common exchange), at which point I make sure to stand up straight (5'11" and obviously pregnant) and make sure my left hand (and its attendant wedding ring) are quite visible. Usually it doesn't go beyond flirtatious compliments, though.

That, and I get the jokesters who like to come up with "witty" responses to my usual question of "Did you find everything you need?" Responses usually include:

- "Well, I couldn't find that stack of $20's I was looking for."
- "All except for a redhead."
- "I didn't see a money tree/bucket of money/etc."

I usually give them a chuckle (if it's not a terrible day, I can make it sound convincing) and tell them, "I don't think we carry those." At least these cracks are better than the "Well it must be free" ones.

AFpheonix · #5 10-30-2006, 07:39 PM

If it's a really old guy and they're saying it with that little playful twinkle in their eye, then it's fine with me. That's just what little old imps do. However, if it's a nasty guy in stained sweatpants and a tee shirt that doesn't quite cover his front-butt, then I'm severely creeped out.

Sofar · #6 10-30-2006, 07:45 PM

Why do people act as though any popular food additive must be poisonous and highly toxic, (or else why would the man be putting it in our food?) It's just corn syrup. It's made from corn. It's just another type of sugar, like beet sugar. The man's just starved for attention, that's why most people fake allergies and ailments.

booger · #7 10-30-2006, 08:24 PM

ummm...I'm allergic to corn of any sort. Well, I haven't been disgnosed with an allergy, but it is a food that my digestive system hasn't handled well AT ALL since I was a baby. I often look to see if I can find stuff without much corn syrup in it. I still eat some of it because it's in near everything, but a day without a stomachache would be like heaven on earth for me!
(even soaps with corn-based alcohol in them cause a reaction. The skin peels right off my hands, almost in sheets, and then my hands look red and feel all burny.)

Primer · #8 10-31-2006, 02:30 AM

Quote:

Quoth Kogarashi

Oooh, good luck with that!

That, and I get the jokesters who like to come up with "witty" responses to my usual question of "Did you find everything you need?" Responses usually include:

- "Well, I couldn't find that stack of $20's I was looking for."
- "All except for a redhead."
- "I didn't see a money tree/bucket of money/etc."

My DH loves to make comments like that. The best I can do is to offer to hold him down while the clerk slaps the stuffings outta him for it.

protege · #9 10-30-2006, 07:42 PM

Quote:

Quoth Pagan

Uh, I hate to remind you, but he's gotta come back and get the book he ordered.

I sincerely hope, for your sake, he never does!

Well, you could always "arrange" for it to never show up...