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Old 05-04-2012, 03:01 AM
yeahwhatev yeahwhatev is offline
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Prove it. "Fake it till you make it" works. It does NOT instill real confidence though. You will ALWAYS have doubts. Self confidence can be self delusion, and still be real enough. Find what you don't like about yourself, work it until YOU like the results. Not easy, not quick. What you do to get self confidence is BELIEVE IT.

People who make great and world-changing achievements can still have self doubt. It is a human condition. Practice knowing your limits and defy them. Improve yourself. Test yourself. When that little voice inside your head speaks.. INTERROGATE IT!! Why? HOW? Can it be better, or am I just making excuses? Is it my fault? WHY?! Am I making things better? Is this just me being mean to myself? You'll be surprised when you realize how much these doubts are just habit.

  #12  
Old 05-04-2012, 11:28 PM
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Pixilated Pixilated is offline
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Quote:
Quoth crazylegs View Post
If it helps any:

Confidence is generally projected. You can be nervous as hell but if you go out with your head high and your shoulders out people will *think* you're confident and things will flow better.

*snip*
Quote:
Quoth aqutalion View Post
Fake it.

That sounds like overly simple advice, but it worked for me. If your brain works the same as mine, there's probably nothing you can do to stop the I'm-not-good-enough thoughts from butting in, and that's fine, let them come, just don't let yourself be paralyzed by them. If you act confident, most people can't the difference between real confidence and faked, and it's a lot easier to be confident when people treat you as if you actually were (if that makes sense). With enough practice, maybe it won't be fake, any more. I'm not quite at that point, but maybe eventually...

*snip*
Both of these are excellent. I had to do a group project this year in which each group member had to do a presentation. I hate doing presentations and frankly think the person who invented PowerPoint should've been strangled at birth. But I ended up with a group of peer reviews and several verbal comments that talked about how "confident" I looked while doing my presentation!

Behave "as if." "As if" you know you will do fine and "as if" you have few or no fears. Others can't see into your mind; they will see the confident person, and eventually you will find the "as if" confidence turn into the real thing.

Does that mean you'll never have doubts again? Definitely not. But I find that it gives me a better sense of perspective about what I can do and what I actually deserve, compared to what my brain is telling me at times.
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