WTF family strikes again

[Akasa]

That's it Kanalah! Keep your spine in tact!

[sstabeler]

Well and my parents are divorced and they hate each other. As they've gotten older they (maybe realize that they messed up) think that they'd rather have me take care of them then my sister.

It's almost funny now because they're trying to be nice to me, but it's very thinly veiled. Both of them think they're competing with each other for free room and board and my servitude until they die. I don't want either of them in my house. I don't have the room and I'm not buying a new house. They both chose my sister as the golden child, they can come crying to her.

in other words, now that they are facing the consequences of their actions, they expect you to bail them out. Without them suffering any consequences whatsoever, and indeed, shifting the consequences onto you. That is unreasonable. (especially since it sounds like they would treat it as if you and your husband were simply older kids. ergo, at a minimum I can see them interfering with any attempt by you to discipline your kids. At worst, they may attempt to usurp your authority over your kids and take discipline of your kids over completely.)

[Kanalah]

My dad believes in "children should be seen and not heard" Ideally he'd have them locked up in their rooms 24/7. He thinks nothing of slapping someone simply because he doesn't want to listen to them. (I know because he did the same to me)

My mom thinks that because my children are "disabled" (Autism and ADHD) that they are both stupid. She is constantly treating them like babies, or calling them stupid or dumb. (again, she did the same to me)

[AccountingDrone]

My dad believes in "children should be seen and not heard" Ideally he'd have them locked up in their rooms 24/7. He thinks nothing of slapping someone simply because he doesn't want to listen to them. (I know because he did the same to me)

My mom thinks that because my children are "disabled" (Autism and ADHD) that they are both stupid. She is constantly treating them like babies, or calling them stupid or dumb. (again, she did the same to me)

LOL He [subjectivley speaking] should hope he is never in a position to do that to me. Once he got out of the hospital, he would be charged with assault and battery and do jail time. I still have a hell of a right hook. Morons like that tend to underestimate us wimmins [and us handicapped ... ]

[XCashier]

LOL He [subjectivley speaking] should hope he is never in a position to do that to me. Once he got out of the hospital, he would be charged with assault and battery and do jail time. I still have a hell of a right hook. Morons like that tend to underestimate us wimmins [and us handicapped ... ]

If only it were that simple to knock their brains into gear...

[darkroxas45]

If only it were that simple to knock their brains into gear...

But it would make for great footage and probably even grand prize of AFV

[sstabeler]

My dad believes in "children should be seen and not heard" Ideally he'd have them locked up in their rooms 24/7. He thinks nothing of slapping someone simply because he doesn't want to listen to them. (I know because he did the same to me)

My mom thinks that because my children are "disabled" (Autism and ADHD) that they are both stupid. She is constantly treating them like babies, or calling them stupid or dumb. (again, she did the same to me)

I'll have to be careful not to let this post get into Fratching territory, but so all I'll say is that it's probably a good thing there's an ocean between me and your parents. Your father would... rapidly...end up in hospital if he slapped me for such a stupid reason and I imagine your mother would piss off me, my mother, and my little sister ( me and my sister are ADHD, I have Aspergers too) and neither me or my sister are stupid. Treat us like babies, and, well, it won't go well.

[taxguykarl]

OK, I give up, Kanalah. Why do you even speak to them? Why haven't they been served with restraining orders?
I would have no contact with anyone who treated me that way, related or not.

[Marmalady]

I think Mom is upset because I found someone else to do shows with and she's trying to weasel back into my life.

You found someone else to do shows with? Gee, I wonder why that was?

Tell them all, your parents, sister, uncle, the whole unholy alliance of them, to go take a running jump. You did well to survive such a toxic family, don't start drinking the poison again now.

[EricKei]

One thing to consider could be pretending they don't exist. Get a call from them? Let it go to VM and never return it. Block their numbers if you can. Get snailmail or email from them? Trash. Hell, mark as spam.

If ignoring them utterly doesn't do the trick, then, yes, as was suggested above, you may wish to consider taking out restraining orders against the lot of them -- ideally, all at once, so the one who hasn't been served yet doesn't get the impression that they're in the clear.

[Talon]

As many others have asked, why are you still in contact with these people? They bring nothing to the table and will take everything from you, including the table.

[XCashier]

If ignoring them utterly doesn't do the trick, then, yes, as was suggested above, you may wish to consider taking out restraining orders against the lot of them -- ideally, all at once, so the one who hasn't been served yet doesn't get the impression that they're in the clear.

Also, change the locks on your doors if any of them has copies of your house keys. I wouldn't put it past any of them to move themselves into your house.

[Kanalah]

Nobody has keys to my house. Just hubs and me.

I honestly don't know anymore why I deal with them. They're not going to change, and the whole lot of them are toxic.

I don't have any contact at all with Uncle and his family - not after the big argument with me and hubby on Easter 4 years ago. (Uncle said that we were horrible people and cheapskates because hubs has a good job and we should spend more money on Uncle and his family for holidays/birthdays. Hubs responded that at least he has a job and doesn't rely on mooching off his mother with Alzheimer's disease. Uncle threw a tantrum and left.)

I don't have any contact with mom between the 2nd week of January and the 3rd week of October. Dad I see every other weekend - but only because he wants free food. I make a point to not be alone with either of them because then the nitpicking and abuse starts.

Hubs and I are actually looking at property out in the country. The long drive will discourage them from visiting as often. Hell, when we repainted the trim on our current house Mom drove right by it twice before she realized it was our house.

[Argabarga]

Moocher camouflage, I like it.

[taxguykarl]

Uncle said that we were horrible people and cheapskates because hubs has a good job and we should spend more money on Uncle and his family for holidays/birthdays. Hubs responded that at least he has a job and doesn't rely on mooching off his mother with Alzheimer's disease. Uncle threw a tantrum and left.

Good for your husband.

Moocher camouflage, I like it.

Good one, agra. Just think if they painted the whole house.