Idiot's guide to the courtesy phone

[Mr. Security]

I thought i'd post this as a funny little guide for Idiot's who use the courtesy phone(if this is not the proper forum for this then you can move it I wasn't quite sure where to put it), you can add to it as you see fit. It's observations I have noticed since we had a courtesy phone put in at our desk( staff would always send people to our desk and tie up our main phone so we had a courtesy phone put in)




- There is a 5 min time limit please obey that, other people maybe waiting to use the phone

- If you are waiting for the phone please wait quietly,do not tap your feet, grumble under your breath and get pissey that you can't use the phone right that minute

- Please only one call, unless it's a emergency do not make 10 calls in a row or come back several times a hour to use the phone

- The courtesy phone is meant to be used for important or relatively important calls, please don't use it to just say hi to your friend because your cell phone is dead or out of minutes, or use it to make calls to places like newspapers to ask a
stupid question about something you read

- Your in a public building please do not yell or scream on the phone, you will be asked to hang up if you don't lower your voice

- In connection to above you are in a public building with a lot of kids going by all the time please do not swear or use other very inappropriate language such as gross/sexual humor and comments. You will be kicked off if you do not stop

- Please do not engage in phone sex with your loved one's there are kids around and they don't need to hear that and neither do I

and finally


Please for the love of god do not engage in Illegal activates over the phone we are 5 feet from you and can hear everything you are saying, activates include

- Prank calling people(especially serious numbers like 911 or others like it)

- Threating people

- organizing your friends to attack someone you don't like

- talking about crimes you've committed that you weren't caught for

and this should be obvious

- DO NOT arrange to either buy, sell and/or make Illegal drugs



so I hope you enjoyed my little guide add your own and i'll be sure to add more as I think of them because i'm sure i'm missing a lot

[bigjimaz]

Since I've been at the laundromat, I have had a few people ask to use the store phone. I gently guide them to the pay phone in the front of the store. Though no one has (yet) complained, I have been given looks that make me think they are foreign to the concept of paying for the call before they dial the number.

[The Laughing Man]

Man am I our only pay phone is broken.

[Mr. Security]

Since I've been at the laundromat, I have had a few people ask to use the store phone. I gently guide them to the pay phone in the front of the store. Though no one has (yet) complained, I have been given looks that make me think they are foreign to the concept of paying for the call before they dial the number.

the funny thing is we have several pay-phones threw out the building so when ever some ask's where a pay phone is we show them where it is and conveniently forgot about the courtesy phone

[friendofjimmyk]

I
- DO NOT arrange to either buy, sell and/or make Illegal drugs

Thats funny to me...you would think that would be common sense...but when you're an addict and the only phone you can use to score is someone's free phone or a courtesy phone...you'll use it.

When I was still using, I would often have my home and cell phones shut off because I couldn't pay the bills..I would use the phone in the office of my apartment complex (where I couldn't pay rent) to call my dude.

Oh, the insanity. I'm so glad I'm clean today!

[iviles]

I
- Please do not engage in phone sex with your loved one's there are kids around and they don't need to hear that and neither do I

and finally


Please for the love of god do not engage in Illegal activates over the phone we are 5 feet from you and can hear everything you are saying, activates include

- Prank calling people(especially serious numbers like 911 or others like it)

- Threating people

- organizing your friends to attack someone you don't like

- talking about crimes you've committed that you weren't caught for

and this should be obvious

- DO NOT arrange to either buy, sell and/or make Illegal drugs



so I hope you enjoyed my little guide add your own and i'll be sure to add more as I think of them because i'm sure i'm missing a lot

All I can say is wow....people are really stupid!

[d962831]

Oh, the insanity. I'm so glad I'm clean today!

props to you man.

[friendofjimmyk]

props to you man.

Thank you!

[BookstoreEscapee]

Heh, we didn't let people use the phone. Payphone's in the back by the bathrooms.

Well, occasionally we would make exceptions such as if someone was stranded and needed to call for a ride or AAA or something like that. Or if they were at customer service and we were having trouble finding what they were looking for, sometimes we'd let them call home to verify info quickly.

[Trayol]

- Please do not engage in phone sex with your loved one's there are kids around and they don't need to hear that and neither do I

Eeeewwwww!

[Mr. Security]

Eeeewwwww!

yeah it's really disturbing when it's a women who is 250lbs and glares at you and says to "stop es dropping" when you tell her to tone it down and that reminds me of another one to add


- Please remember your on a public phone out in the open by the main lobby and your only 5ft from where the guard is sitting, any and all privacy is gone, Do not glare or yell at security or other people thinking there listening in. Security does not care who you are talking to. If you want privacy go home or find a secluded pay phone


- It is highly recommended that you do not give out personal information over the courtesy phone such as bank numbers, financial info or other personal information that could be used to create fraud such as identity theft, your in a very public building where it is very easy to over hear such things

[bean]

- It is highly recommended that you do not give out personal information over the courtesy phone such as bank numbers, financial info or other personal information that could be used to create fraud such as identity theft, your in a very public building where it is very easy to over hear such things

Not to mention that chances are, the patch panel for all the phone lines is probably in a dark corner somewhere and not locked up at all. It'd be stupidly easy to tap a recorder into a couple of the lines.

Thankfully someone thought it'd be a good idea to put a camera over ours, but I think it's pointed at the fire exit nearby (the door has a sign "Smile - you're on camera!" taped to it).

[Mr. Security]

Not to mention that chances are, the patch panel for all the phone lines is probably in a dark corner somewhere and not locked up at all. It'd be stupidly easy to tap a recorder into a couple of the lines.

Well there is a "telephone" room which I believe would have that in it and it is locked but the lock could be picked easily and it's out of the way so I could see that happening


I also remembered another one


- Long distance calling is disabled on the phone, stop trying to call your friend in Europe and then bitch and moan we don't let you call long distance

[Mr. Security]

- Please for the love of god don't use the phone when your drunk, you most likely will be loud and swear and I will kick your drunk ass out!

[TryNotToBeThatOne]

- Do not use the courtesy phone to call your boy/girl friend to chat & then when your supervisor comes looking for you, claim that you were calling your mother.