Nosy landlord won't mind his own biz

[bhskittykatt]

So background: about three and a half weeks ago my husband declared he wasn't happy with our relationship and wanted out. We've married 6 years, together for 9, and he's apparently done. That's a whole other post I haven't bothered with yet because...well it sucks.

Thing is, he hasn't actually left yet. His stuff is packed up but he hasn't found an apartment yet, so we're in this really weird awkward living situation where he's still camped out on the couch and we don't talk much and...well it sucks.

What's annoying me is our landlord. He knows the husband is moving out when he finds a place. Every day, every single day, either my landlord or his brother asks me, "So is [estranged husband] moving out yet? When is he moving out?"

Every day it's the same answer: He's moving out when he finds a place and I'll let you know when that happens.

It's annoying because firstly, it's none of his damn business, and secondly, it just rubs it in daily that my life is going to f**king hell.

Today my landlord asked me if I'd found another man yet. That just pissed me off. That's really none of his business and for me it's just rubbing my face in the separation that much more. I've been emotionally in hell; I don't need this shit.

TLDR: landlord keeps getting in my business and won't back the hell off.

[Lachrymose]

Ugh...how awful.

And hugs to you!

[MoonCat]

My sympathies on the whole mess.

A word of warning, too. He may be interested in when your husband is leaving, and whether or not you've "found another man", because he plans on hitting on you when your husband is gone. Please take care.

[XCashier]

Aw, Kitty, that really, really sucks. I'm sorry you're going through that.

A word of warning, too. He may be interested in when your husband is leaving, and whether or not you've "found another man", because he plans on hitting on you when your husband is gone. Please take care.

That's what I'm wondering. And being your landlord, he probably has a key to your place. Is there someone higher up that you can complain to? And get extra locks if you can.

[HotelMinion]

Ouch
I think the landlord is being inappropriate. Once a week is okay, but every day? Please. That's harassment.
Hoping your situation gets better.

[bhskittykatt]

A word of warning, too. He may be interested in when your husband is leaving, and whether or not you've "found another man", because he plans on hitting on you when your husband is gone. Please take care.

That thought crossed my mind. Eww just....no. He's always given off slightly skeevy vibes, though not necessarily pervy, just skeezy slumlord vibes (it's not the most glamorous complex...I've had my building raided by the DEA, so that gives you a clue as to what my neighbors are like).

I'm hoping it's more of a he just doesn't think I can afford to pay rent w/o a man sort of thing. Which is still incredibly obnoxious but I'd be a lot more comfortable with that than with...eww gross.

[KuariKaydrith]

I would be looking for a new place as well, tbh. Skeezy slumlord types can turn pervy or worse real quick, especially when a woman is by herself and they know it.

[raudf]

See, if it wasn't for the whole, "I turned a blind eye about drugs on the property, but you're husband is leaving is MY business," I would have said, maybe the landlord is concerned, like old aunt level concerned, about you. As it is, I'd start looking for another place too!

[notalwaysright]

It's... Fairly hard to get apartments around here. If I remember right, national rental vacancy rates are at about 8%. The west coast sits at 5%. This town is at 1.3%. Not saying he can't find a place, it's just all the good places get snapped up quick. And not all exes... Well, some are content to deal with the awkward because it's cheaper than paying for a place themselves.

Anyway, that whole situation sucks hard. Hoping the landlord gets a clue, 'cause that's so creepy and unacceptable.

[Tee]

My sympathies on the whole mess.

A word of warning, too. He may be interested in when your husband is leaving, and whether or not you've "found another man", because he plans on hitting on you when your husband is gone. Please take care.

Oh wow, I'd assumed it was for rent purposes.


I wish you didnt have to go through this Katt, I hope it ends soon, and that it gets better for you.

[taxguykarl]

I agree with raudf, this will probably not end well. Looking for a place of your own is not a a bad idea.

[Mr Hero]

Just came to offer my condolences. Having had something similar, but on a much smaller scale, and having it suck so bad as it is, I can't imagine how you're feeling.

[WishfulSpirit]

Do you have a male cousin or friend who can walk you around holding your hand and kissing your neck? Skeevy guys like that won't back off until they see you with another guy, because they consider female bodies the proper property of males, and will only stop trying to "stake a claim" if someone else was there first.

[greek_jester]

I hate to say this, but maybe it would be better if your ex kept the flat and you looked elsewhere? This landlord is setting off every creep-creep-creep-get-out-pepper-spray! vibe I've got, and I'm only reading it on the screen. I don't know if you can trust him to follow the rules about entering your flat without permission.

[morgana]

I'm with greek jester. This is sounding like something from a crime movie.

Have you flat-out asked him (in an angry tone of voice for greater emphasis) why the HELL he wants to know?