Adventures in hospitality

[Moirae]

This brings me to a story from just a couple of days ago.

You see, we're in the middle of a special event period right now. One of our hotels used to be a franchse, but in this economy its just not viable to keep paying the franchise fees so the hotel is no longer part of the franchise.

I had a girl call to cancel the reservation during this special event and it went something like this... Keep in mind that it was 4:50 which means the managers have gone for the day since I work at head office, not at one of the hotels.

Me: "Thank you for calling so-and-so hotel, moirae speaking, how can I assist you?"

SC: "Yes, I'd like to cancel my reservation"

Me: "Whats your last name please"

SC: *silence*

Me: "Hello?"

SC: "Yes, I'm here. What did you want?"

Me: "Can I have your last name so I can look up the reservation?"

SC: "I have my confirmation number, do you want that"

Me: *thinking* If I wanted that, I'd have asked for it. I asked for your last name. "Your last name is easier because confirmation numbers change depending on where and how you booked it"

SC: gives last name

Me: after looking it up "I'm sorry, you booked during special event dates. We are well within the cancellation policy, so I can cancel your reservation but you will still be charged the full amount for the stay."

SC: starting to get annoyed "Can't you just cancel it?"

Me: "I can't, because you agreed to this policy when you booked the reservation."

SC: "Thats not what I was told, I was told it was 24 hours"

Me: "I'm sorry, company policy is 30 days. I'm not sure who you were talking to but the reservation says 30 days."

Honestly, the reservation didn't state a cancellation policy one way or the other, but it was booked by the franchse back when the hotel was still a part of the franchse. And they would quote the same policy we do so I stick to my guns on this.

SC: "Can I talk to your manager?"

Me: "My managers have all left for the day and will be back on Mon.."

SC cuts me off "Then I guess you will just have to cancel it"

Me: "No... I won't. I have to stick my company policy or my paycheck will get dinged for it ..."

SC cuts me off again and by now starting to get loud and confrontational "Get me a manager".

Me: "As I explained, my managers are all gone and will be ba.."

SC: *screams* "WHAT IS YOUR NAME"

Me: *click*

I'm not paid enough to get screamed at, so she was hung up on. By this point, I'd been lied to three times by guests that day, and already had a confrontation with a different person that wanted to cancel (had braced myself for a fight but didn't get one for that one).

[Moirae]

I'm going to give an example what a clean and easy reservation is like so that some posts I make on here will make some sense. Keep in mind that this means no hesitation or confusion on the guests part. They know exactly what they want and when they want it.

If your accent is extremely thick or you barely speak english, please do us both a favor and book online.

Me: "Thank you for calling such-and-such hotel/company head office (our phones identify where you're calling and if you're calling a general number so we know which one to answer with) reservations, moirae speaking, how can I assist you?'

Guest: "I need to cancel/make/change a reservation"

Me: (for cancel or change a reservation) "Could I get your last name, please"
Guest: *provides exactly what I ask for*
Me: *looks it up, confirms dates of stay to make sure its the right reservation and makes the changes, or cancellations based on the cancellation policy on file, number of guests, etc*
Me: *repeats the changes to make sure they're exactly like the guest needs and provides a cancellation number. ALWAYS take a cancellation number if its offered. Names can be spelled wrong, you may be charged wrong accidentally (people are human after all and they make mistakes), and anything can happen*

Me: (new reservation) "For what dates of stay?" No, I didn't say date, I said DATES. As in, what day do you want to come in and what day do you want to leave. You should know this already when you call.

Guest: "I want to come in on *this* date and leave on *this* date". If you are staying with a group, tell me NOW, don't make me quote all the other rates first. The groups always have special circumstances attached to them. That means that a 2 night minimum that applies to everyone else may not apply to you, and that you will likely have rates that are quite a bit lower than anywhere else due to the contract the person created for the group. And for gods sakes, KNOW the name of the group before you call. I can't help you if you don't know who you're staying with.

As well, a night is a night. Meaning, if you are coming in on Monday and leaving on Wednesday, thats two nights. If you were going to be charged for three days, then we'd say you were staying for a day, not a night.

Me: I check the rates, and quote them to the guest. I will NOT give a discount unless you ask for one. Please do it before I quote you the rates so I don't have to do it a second time. This is standard procedure in most hotels. If you want a discount, tell me exactly where you saw it (web site address, or if you called in), and what special circumstances (like a AAA card) might give you one. Please no hemming or hawing, and no a print out doesn't count. If you don't know where you saw it, the answer is no. Rates change daily, sometimes more than once, and there is no guarantee that the same rate you were quoted an hour ago is still available, especially during a special event. If you don't know what your dates of stay are already, then why don't you find out before you call? I will ALWAYS tell you whether the hotel is smoking or non-smoking and note it on the reservation that I have done so, so coming into a non-smoking hotel and smoking is not an excuse and the hotel will ding you for cleaning funds. The amount of cleaning required after a smoker has been in a room costs about $200 in order to make it possible for someone with allergies to stay in the room again.

Guest: "I want to stay for these dates* If you need something specific (like a roll in shower, fridge, etc) tell me immediately (please don't make me tell you everything and then find out that you can't book because we don't have what you want.). Not all of our hotels have everything you may want.

Me: I take the guests information. Please only tell me when I ask you it instead of barreling on without stopping to listen. I can only type so fast and I take sometimes hundreds of calls a day, I won't remember everything you're saying, if you say it all at once, no matter how good I am.

Tell me the exact number of adults, and the exact number of children. Yes, it will change the rate.

I mean I need your your contact phone number, cell phone, house phone, doesn't matter.

Your address is the address attached to your credit card, not a friends address or a relatives address. This includes if you are from over seas.

YES, I will need your credit card number. Period. There is no discussing it. If you are not willing to give it, then I will politely say goodbye because I can't accept your reservation. Your credit card number ensures we get paid and you have a room. It guarantees it. The previously mentioned family that destroyed the room above was the last time I have ever seen a manager accept a cash deposit for a room. Cash is not acceptable. This is not a personal attack on you.

Before I click save, I will quote you the cancellation policy which you then must verbally agree to before I finish the reservation. If it is not acceptable to you, don't just say yes to get the reservation. You will be held accountable if you violate the cancellation. This is whats called a destination market, not a hotel out in the middle of Kansas. That means we are busy, we are full, and EVERYONE (yes EVERYONE) will tell you the same thing. The occasional exception does not make it a standard. Exceptions are only made for emergencies and deaths and with proof.

Finally...

"I have never heard of a credit card authorization form/nonrefundable 30 day cancellation period/ 72 hr cancellation period/etc" is NOT an excuse. If you haven't heard of it before, its not my problem, and you will not be exempt from it no matter how much you complain.

Yes, these things are kind of harsh, but I don't have control over them. I'm just a reservations agent, not a manager. Yelling at me will only get me to hang up on you.

Now is the time for questions on your part. Parking policy is a good one to ask. So are additional fees. No, I don't have control over the prices, the hotel managers do so you will need to speak with a hotel manager (not my manager) to get it waived and they may not be willing to do so.

ALWAYS ask about additional fees.

ALWAYS take the confirmation number and ask for it if it isn't offered. Human mistakes happen and sometimes we spell things wrong so your name may be wrong in the system. A confirmation number is provided just in case.

Late checkouts are possible, but since checkout is at 11 and you want to stay until 4 (after housekeeping has left for the day), you will be charged for another full night because we can't resell the room. This is why most hotels won't allow a later checkout than noon. Because our housekeepers need to get in your room so its ready for the next night.

Decided to stay another night but didn't tell the front desk? Thats fine, so long as the room is empty the next night. If it isn't and there's nowhere to move the next nights guest, you WILL be booted out, up to and including physically removing you and your things from the room. So... contact the front desk before you make such a decision. You do NOT get the room by default. Your contracted nights (which you signed on checkin) were for those exact dates. Once those dates are over, your contract is done with and we have to deal with a new contract with a new guest. Housekeeping checks all rooms after noon. If your stuff is still in your room at that time, we will contact you again at one and at two. Stuff still there? You will be locked out of your room. Still there at 4? You're charged another night or your physically booted and you will find your stuff at the front desk.

While you are with us show some respect for others, you are not the only guest. That means do NOT smoke pot. If we find you, we will not only boot you, but you will be charged for all the money we have to give to discount the other inconvenienced guests in the hotel. Do NOT have loud music coming from your room, and party's are NOT acceptable unless they don't interfere with other guests. All hotels that I know of have a three strikes you're out rule, and they WILL keep your money because you agreed to the cancellation policy when you booked the room. That policy includes disruption to the other guests and causing trouble for the hotel.

One of the parts I love about my job is helping customers with touristy stuff. This is an old and fascinating area with a great deal of history. I'm not from here so I've done all the tourist stuff myself, and its alot of fun. I can't tell you where a good kosher restaurant is, but I CAN tell you where to find good jumbalya and gumbo, where to find a really good breakfast, and how to get to Emeril's. I can tell you about my favorite tours, and the coolest plantation in the area to visit. I can regale you with tales from the olden times when the French met the Spanish in the area, and about Marie LeVeau's ghost.

Its fun to talk about all this stuff and I simply love it. If you ask, I love to help provided its really quiet on the phones that day. If its busy, I'll have to transfer you to the front desk.

I will NOT give you phone numbers of other hotels. I don't have them and wouldn't even if I did. And the only time I will recommend any hotel that we don't own is if we have nothing left to sell in any of our hotels. So don't ask.

[Duncan MacLeod]

This post was EPIC.... and i LOVE long posts ( i never understand why people apologize for long posts) My favorite was the one about the wrong number, very Gravekeeper-esque.

[Mytical]

Wow. Hate to say this, but I can't wait for what else has happened. I realize it is not good for you, but these are some very interesting tales.

[HotelMinion]

Hey, another hotel worker. Join us! LOL
With the exception of the throat slicing man, most of these experience sound pretty familiar. Though I've never been robbed (knock on wood) my coworker has, and I dunno what I would do if that ever happened. Actually, I think I would run like hell, shut myself in the back room, grab my cell phone and call 911. I'd just go into adernaline: flight mode. That girl sure was brave to clobber that thief. I doubt I could do that LOL. I've never had a fire either, but before I started working in this particular hotel, someone pulled the fire alarm, causing the sprinklers to go off, the Fire Dept to be called, and the alarms, woke everyone up and everyone had to be evacuated, it was freezing night. Needless to say, guests were pissed, and the current night auditor was ho hum kinda guy, kinda like me, and I can very clearly imagine frantic women in their nightgowns coming up to him like, WTF is going on?! Are we gonna DIIIEEEE?!?!?!?! And he was just like uh, no. The women wrote a lot of nasty comments about us, saying they weren't made to feel comforted about their safety, and the guy was uncaring. Jeez, it wasn't a real fire! If you want comforting, get a teddy bear. I wasn't even there and I was indignant. LOL

[Moirae]

Ok, got another for you that I just remembered.

The city I used to live in has only one major event a year, but its a big one. Some idiotic car show that people come to see from around the world. Its not just the city that sells out, its all hotels in all cities and towns for a three hour drive.

People go to this car show, and then these big expensive classic cars get driven up and down the "strip" (two roads covering about 10 miles) over and over again for hours on end.

Personally, I can't imagine anything more boring, but some people seem to really love it.

Needless to say, the hotels in the area... well, its like Mardi Gras. Insane. And anything can happen.

Usually we were sold out months in advance, but sometimes rooms would pop up at the last second and people are desperate for rooms at the time.

I've had bidding wars in the lobby for the last room in house. The highest rate I've ever seen is $880 a night for a queen size bed that normally went for $129. And that wasn't my doing. It was 4 couples having a bidding war in my lobby over the last room.

I've had people offer $120 a night for a blanket and pillow on the floor of one of the convention rooms.

Occasionally, though, it goes really wrong and these bidding wars can start a fist fight because apparently these people can't use their brains to think for five seconds. And its so busy that cops getting to us quickly is just not something thats going to happen. I was once told by the police station that it would be two hours before the cops could get there because they were dealing with other instances of the exact same thing.

So how did it get resolved? One time, the wives/girlfriends jumped on their husbands backs and knocked them over. Another time, people got in between them.

Its like watching a movie, and it really makes you wonder what is wrong with people.

[Moirae]

Ok, stop saying that you know one of the owners and they said you could have a rate. If you do know one of the owners, then THEY will book the room for you.

No, I'm not transferring you to them. If you knew them, you'd already have their phone number.

If I say no discounts are available, then no discounts are available. Period. I don't care how far in advance it is, or if you have some entertainment card, no discounts are available. This is not up to discussion, and talking to my manager won't get you anywhere so don't bother.

I really hate these web sites who think they know how to get you better rates and try to teach you how to do it. They do NOT. Escalating up the line to a manager will not change it. And being rude in any way will not get me to see your point any faster when I already think you're moron.

Calling the reservations office asking for the COO when you already have his cell number is just plain dumb. If he wanted to talk to you, he'd answer his cell. So knock off the calling every other day.

You, the customer, knowing my name, even my first name, is idiotic. Its personal. I don't like having to give it to you and no business should EVER force that. Why? Because crazy people like to hunt people down when they know their name to beat the crap out of them when they're told "no". I may have to say it, but I'll say it fast so you can't understand, because I've seen too many crazy people out there. If you're good and you ask again, I'll say my name again. If you're bad, I'll hang up.

[Moirae]

I just talked to Michael Jackson. No, I'm not kidding. It was Michael Jackson. He even spelled it as Michael J Jackson (as in Joseph).

Of course... it wasn't the REAL Michael Jackson, and he didn't have a high pitched voice, but it WAS Michael Jackson lol.

rofl... and I just talked to ANOTHER Michael Jackson. I don't think I've ever talked one before, and now I've had two in one day.

[Tama]

Hey, I knew a James Kirk in highschool...

He was WAY too young for it to be a mistake.

Funny names are good.

[Caractacus_Potts]

have to say though, I was impressed. How often do you see a girl beat the living crap out of a thief like that?

I didn't see it but my co-workers daughter was on vacation in Italy sightseeing at the Vatican when a purse snatcher tried to grab her purse as he ran past her. She held on and crouched pulling the guy backwards so he landed on his ass. She kicked him in the head, in the side and was about to go for the groin when she saw the shocked expression on two priests standing there, remembered where she was and stopped long enough for the guy to get up and run away.

Your manager was right though. I was cashiering at a McD's in LA years ago when a guy knocked the old lady I was making change for to the floor, reached over the counter and grabbed the stack of twenties from my drawer. I could care less about Ronald's cash but throwing the old lady to the floor pissed me of. I jumped the counted and chased the guy for three blocks before I lost him.

On the walk back a police car responding to the call picked me up and I got a lecture about how I could have been killed or seriously hurt, I have no idea if the guy has a weapon or a partner, etc. I told them I understood, it was just a spur of the moment thing that I didn't think through.

[Caractacus_Potts]

Ok, stop saying that you know one of the owners and they said you could have a rate. If you do know one of the owners, then THEY will book the room for you.

Reminds me of a funny story I read from a woman who works as an executive receptionist. She got a call from a guy trying to get her to put him through to the company CEO. He knew the CEO's name but refused to give his name or state the reason he was calling. He went from polite to belligerent trying different tactics to get her to put him through until...

Guy: Look! I'm CEO's brother. This is a personal family EMERGENCY! If you do not put me through this second you WILL be fired!
Woman: Really? I'm CEO's sister and I was unaware that I had a second brother.
Guy: *click*

[Moirae]

Reminds me of a funny story I read from a woman who works as an executive receptionist. She got a call from a guy trying to get her to put him through to the company CEO. He knew the CEO's name but refused to give his name or state the reason he was calling. He went from polite to belligerent trying different tactics to get her to put him through until...

Guy: Look! I'm CEO's brother. This is a personal family EMERGENCY! If you do not put me through this second you WILL be fired!
Woman: Really? I'm CEO's sister and I was unaware that I had a second brother.
Guy: *click*

roflmao. Thats priceless.

[Moirae]

I didn't see it but my co-workers daughter was on vacation in Italy sightseeing at the Vatican when a purse snatcher tried to grab her purse as he ran past her. She held on and crouched pulling the guy backwards so he landed on his ass. She kicked him in the head, in the side and was about to go for the groin when she saw the shocked expression on two priests standing there, remembered where she was and stopped long enough for the guy to get up and run away.

Your manager was right though. I was cashiering at a McD's in LA years ago when a guy knocked the old lady I was making change for to the floor, reached over the counter and grabbed the stack of twenties from my drawer. I could care less about Ronald's cash but throwing the old lady to the floor pissed me of. I jumped the counted and chased the guy for three blocks before I lost him.

On the walk back a police car responding to the call picked me up and I got a lecture about how I could have been killed or seriously hurt, I have no idea if the guy has a weapon or a partner, etc. I told them I understood, it was just a spur of the moment thing that I didn't think through.

Yeah, the thing is, the cops are often useless. Its why alot people are instinctively starting to take more of an active hand against criminals.

[Moirae]

So I just had a call from a guest... here's how it went

SC: "Yeah, the internet says that the hotel was just newly renovated, is that true?"
Me: nahhh, I'm going to tell you it isn't, because I'm stupid. "Well, about 8 months ago, all the carpets and beds were replaced, and a fitness center added"
SC: "Well, thats not really renovated now is it."
Me: what the hell am I supposed to say to that? I just didn't say anything at all.
SC: "So can you tell me what the rooms look like? Do they all look like the ones on the internet"
Me: "Well sir, this hotel is 175 years old. All the rooms are different shapes and different sizes with very high 14 foot ceilings. They're all pretty but not all of them look like the pictures on the internet because they can't all look like that, they're all different"
SC: "Ok, so its false advertising then. I want details on what all the rooms look like"
Me: wth? "There are 170 rooms in this hotel, every single one of them are different like I just told you. I can't give you details on all the rooms because of that"
SC: "I still want details"
Me: oh for fucks sake "Well since I can't provide them, would you like me to transfer you to the front desk? They have more details on the rooms than I do'
SC: "Yes"
Me: Transfers the call.

Look, we are not going to ruin the charm of the hotel by destroying walls that are 175 years old because you want all the rooms to look alike. If you want a hotel thats new and uniform, then go find one because all the hotels we own are between 120 and 175 years old. They are historic hotels.

Oh and one of my favorite questions that I've been asked twice in the last two days "Is it safe there?" my answer is always "I walk around down here all the time with no problem so I'd say yes" What... you think I'm dumb enough to say if it isn't? Its the downtown area of a major city. How safe do you think it is? Stop asking stupid questions and don't be a moron when you're in the city. Just like anywhere else.

[morgana]

I actually know a Michael Jackson. Nice guy, early sixties, used to be a school teacher. Don't ask him about the famous one, though. He'll be standing on a table ranting before you can get away. I guess a lot of his students thought they were funny . . .