2 gems

[Crow The Robot]

Not the customers but the stories

In which I cringe for the human race, again.

It's raining, my co-worker and I are wearing rain coats, and there are puddles of water everywhere, and we are outside in the rain.
SC: duh
Me: should never have left home
CW: see above

SC: Hey home come these carts are wet.
Cw: Well, it's raining
SC: That's just a lazy man's excuse. These should be dry.
ME: Sir, there are dry carts inside.
SC: I don't wanna get a cart inside I wanna dry cart NOW!!
CW: Well, sir I'm sorry, but, it's raining and that's why all the carts outside.
SC: you all is lazy!!!
Okay seriously, unless you are doing a peopane exchange then, you are going inside anyway, what's the issue here.

Math basics
Okay if something is listed 5 for $5, the price of one is $1, which is actually the regular price for said item, but I digress.

MM: Math Mom
ME: Flypaper for morons

MM: Hey you retard!!! This is false advertising!!!!
ME: What do you mean?
MM; Well, I know you don't know what false advertising means cuz you are stupid but, I went back to the chip department, an' they were a dollar,
Me. ...
MM: That would make it $10 for five not $5 for five. My kid's an honor student. I am calling the attorney general and the BBB, and my attorney about this.
Me: Would you like a manager?
MM: No, they'll just say the same thing!!!

[Imogene]

MM; Well, I know you don't know what false advertising means cuz you are stupid but, I went back to the chip department, an' they were a dollar.
That would make it $10 for five not $5 for five. My kid's an honor student.

"Ma'am/Sir/Unidentifiable goop on the bottom of my shoe, how much is five ones? No, better idea, let's ask your honor student, because his genetics are not necessarily yours... only half of his are, and half are your significant other's."

[Geek King]

"Ma'am/Sir/Unidentifiable goop on the bottom of my shoe, how much is five ones? No, better idea, let's ask your honor student, because his genetics are not necessarily yours... only half of his are, and half are your significant other's."

No, no--The proper response is, "You are correct ma'am. Please allow me to sell you these for $10."

[Bradester]

No, no--The proper response is, "You are correct ma'am. Please allow me to sell you these for $10."

I concur. People that stupid deserve to be taken advantage of.

[AdminAssistant]

Brain go BOOM.

[KhirasHY]

I wonder how long it took her to realize exactly how stupid her math was. I imagine her, hours later, at home cooking dinner...cooking...


...........
(chop chop chop vegetables)
...........
(put cassarole into oven)
...........
(wash hands)
...........
"Ah DAMNIT!"

[Jay 2K Winger]

Not the customers but the stories

In which I cringe for the human race, again.

It's raining, my co-worker and I are wearing rain coats, and there are puddles of water everywhere, and we are outside in the rain.
SC: duh
Me: should never have left home
CW: see above

SC: Hey home come these carts are wet.
Cw: Well, it's raining
SC: That's just a lazy man's excuse. These should be dry.
ME: Sir, there are dry carts inside.
SC: I don't wanna get a cart inside I wanna dry cart NOW!!
CW: Well, sir I'm sorry, but, it's raining and that's why all the carts outside.
SC: you all is lazy!!!

OH GOD, I get this one all the time when I'm manning the front door when it's raining. Or when it's rained the night before.

SC: How come all your carts are wet?
J2K: Because it rained last night.
SC: How come you didn't put your carts inside? [Note: They mean, inside the vestibule.]
J2K: Because it's a fire hazard.
SC: Well, why not inside the store, then?
J2K: Where would you suggest we put them? To block the aisles with all the carts so they stay dry?
SC: I want a dry cart!
J2K: We have paper towels up here to dry them off with.

And invariably, the SCs will walk RIGHT PAST the roll of paper towels I have set there for them to use, and grab a handful of napkins from the food court instead. :sigh:

[Mongo Skruddgemire]

MM: That would make it $10 for five not $5 for five. My kid's an honor student. I am calling the attorney general and the BBB, and my attorney about this.
Me: Would you like a manager?
MM: No, they'll just say the same thing!!!

Hrmm...tough choice. I've narrowed it down to...

"Well I guess the person who put up the sign was wrong. Here, I'll sell it to you for the proper price of $10 for five."

Or

"Your son might be an honor student, but you ma'am are an idiot of epic proportions."

M

[Sarlon]

MM: That would make it $10 for five not $5 for five. My kid's an honor student. I am calling the attorney general and the BBB, and my attorney about this.

ohohohohoh can I be there when you go to those people? I need a REALLY good laugh and so will they!

honor roll in this day and age means nothing it seems....

[Seraph]

Criminy I've been playing too much Diablo...

I saw your thread title and immediately thought "Oooh was it Flawless or Perfect?" (BTW I'm looking for some topazes... /flutters eyelashes)

But...I guess your customers were...chipped. XD Especially the mathematically challenged one.

[Soulstealer]

ohohohohoh can I be there when you go to those people? I need a REALLY good laugh and so will they!

honor roll in this day and age means nothing it seems....

Or he's adopted, at least that's my theory.

[Samaliel]

Brain go BOOM.

Same here. Does yours grow back ? If not, try not to pick up bits of mine. There are things in there you wouldn't want to know.

[earl colby pottinger]

Mix up

"Ma'am/Sir/Unidentifiable goop on the bottom of my shoe, how much is five ones? No, better idea, let's ask your honor student, because his genetics are not necessarily yours... only half of his are, and half are your significant other's."

With the level of IQ shown by the mom, I would consider that there was a mix-up of babies. Somewhere out there are two bright parents with one very dumb child.

[walking with scissors]

I concur. People that stupid deserve to be taken advantage of.

Stupid people don't deserve to be taken advantage of. Rude stupid people, however, do.