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  • Pizza-Pizza Madness (longish)

    Sorry for the length, I didn't realize that it would be quite this long.

    I’ve had a few customer service oriented jobs in my time.

    My very first job was working at a Little Caesars Pizza in a neighboring suburb. It was a great job for me at the time (as I was 16, and what teenager doesn’t love pizza?) My mom wasn’t too thrilled, as all my clothes and car always smelled like pizza, but that’s another story.

    At this point in time (early 90s), Little Caesars offered two pizzas for the price of one, usually around $10US. And you could have different toppings on both pizzas, as long as they had the same number of toppings. (Not that that is important to my story, but it’s an interesting factoid.)

    Now, I had never been officially trained in “proper” customer service at this job, so I didn’t cave in to SCs or put up with their berations. (sp?) I just didn’t put up with any of their crap. Which seemed to just annoy them all the more.

    My favorite SC story from Little Caesars shows how little patience I had in dealing with these self-important morons:

    A bit of backstory: During the busy times, when people would call in ahead to order their pizzas to be ready at a specific time, we would pre-make their pies and then put them through the oven about 10 minutes before they wanted to pick them up. Our ovens took about 7 minutes to cook the pizzas. Add in a couple of minutes to pull them out of the oven, slice and package and there you go. Now bear in mind, our regular turn around time was usually about 15 to 20 minutes.

    Cast of Characters
    SC: Moronic Man of Great Magnitude
    Me: Pizza Boy Extraordinaire
    My Thoughts and Actions
    Manager: My ever-so-cool manager

    This particular night, I was answering the phones and working the front counter. Anyways, Mr. Moron calls in, places his order and I thought he said he wanted his pizzas ready at a specific time. As we were starting to get busy, I had his pizzas pre-made and then set them aside.

    Fast forward 15 minutes and Mr. Moron comes in…now he wasn’t sucky until about halfway through our exchange.

    Me: Hi, may I help you?
    SC: Order for Moron.
    Me: Certainly. (Look around at the pizzas orders that are ready, but not seeing his.)
    Me: I’m sorry, what was the name again? (In case I misheard him.)
    SC: Moron; M-O-R-O-N. (He wasn’t sucky, just spelling it out to be helpful.)
    Me: (Thinking the name sounded familiar and then remembering the order I took just 15 minutes ago.) Excuse me for a moment. (Wander over to our prep station, find the order, place the pizzas on the oven rack and head back to the front counter.)
    Me: I apologize sir, I must have misheard you when you ordered, I thought you wanted your pizzas ready at *time* and so they’re not ready yet. They have been made and I just placed them in the oven, they should be ready in about 7 minutes. I will be able to give you a disc…
    SC: (Cutting me off and now yelling) WHAT DO YOU MEAN THEY’RE NOT READY?
    Me: (Slightly taken aback) I do apologize, sir, but I must have misheard when you placed your order. Again, I just put your pizzas in the oven and they’ll just be a few minutes. And I will give you a disc…
    SC: (Again, cutting me off) WELL, THAT’S JUST GREAT! JUST GREAT! I HAD THIS WHOLE EVENING PERFECTLY PLANNED AND NOW IT’S RUINED! WE RENTED A MOVIE AND WE WERE GOING TO WATCH IT WHILE WE WERE EATING THEM!! YOU HAVE RUINED OUR WHOLE EVENING! WHAT ELSE CAN GO WRONG TONIGHT?!!
    Me: (Being the ever snarky teen, and now pointing into the parking lot) Sir, your car is on fire.
    SC: (Shocked, whirls around to look in the lot, seeing that his car is indeed not on fire, turns back to me.)
    Me: (Slightly raising my voice, as I really don’t like being yelled at) SIR, I am sorry that I misheard you. I do apologize. Your pizzas will be ready in 7 minutes, if you would like them, please have a seat over there (Pointing to seats) and I will call you when they’re ready, otherwise the door is over there! (Pointing to door.)
    SC: Um… (Slinks over and sits down, probably in shock that a "mere" teenager would dare talk back to him.)

    I was pretty upset at this point and walked around the corner that is hidden from the customers and run into my cool manager, who is trying very, very hard to not laugh.
    Manager: Um, that’s not really how you’re supposed to talk to the customers.
    Me: I know, but he just really pushed my buttons. I ruined his whole evening over 7 minutes? My goodness, someone call a violinist.
    Manager: Well, (giggling) just try to be a bit nicer in the future.

    So a few minutes later, Mr. Moron’s pizzas are ready. My coworker pulled them out of the oven, cut and bagged them and hands them to me.

    I walk up to the counter, pizzas in hand.

    Me: Mr. Moron, your pizzas are ready.
    SC: Um, thank you.
    Me: And because the delay was my fault, I am going to give you a discount of $3 off your order. (Now whispering to him) Though I really shouldn’t, since you were so rude to me.

    He didn’t say anything else, he just paid, took his pizzas and left my store.
    Kewl Beans!

  • #2
    Quoth Scotlers View Post
    SC: (Again, cutting me off) WELL, THAT’S JUST GREAT! JUST GREAT! I HAD THIS WHOLE EVENING PERFECTLY PLANNED AND NOW IT’S RUINED! WE RENTED A MOVIE AND WE WERE GOING TO WATCH IT WHILE WE WERE EATING THEM!! YOU HAVE RUINED OUR WHOLE EVENING! WHAT ELSE CAN GO WRONG TONIGHT?!!
    Me: (Being the ever snarky teen, and now pointing into the parking lot) Sir, your car is on fire.
    Excellent comeback!

    Oh, if only it had been true!
    "If life ain't just a joke, then why are we laughing?" - Gerard Way

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    • #3
      Classic!

      I remember Little Caesar's ... we loved ordering from them. Cheap and decent pizza.
      "Always stand near the door." -- Doctor Who

      Kuya's Kitchen -- Cooking, Cooking Gadgets, and Food Related Blather from a Transplanted Foodie

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      • #4
        Quoth Scotlers View Post
        My mom wasn’t too thrilled, as all my clothes and car always smelled like pizza, but that’s another story.

        .
        Another down fall to working restaurants. Not all are bad - but when I worked for Chili's - I'd smell like fajitas all the time. Well, actually - greasy onion, meaty smell - mmmm....

        I worked at another restaurant where we served all-you-can-eat crawfish - good lord - that's a whole new server stench all together!!!
        "I'm still walking, so I'm sure that I can dance!" from Saint of Circumstance - Grateful Dead

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        • #5
          Quoth badgegirl007 View Post
          I wish they were still around. There's a few of them still open but none are close enough to me
          There's one over here by where I work. They have "hot and ready" specials now - you can walk in and get a pizza handed to you right away for $5 - or $6 depending on the toppings.

          I can't eat pizza anymore - I wish I can because I liked Little Cesars.
          "I'm still walking, so I'm sure that I can dance!" from Saint of Circumstance - Grateful Dead

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          • #6
            Quoth Scotlers View Post
            Me: (Slightly taken aback) I do apologize, sir, but I must have misheard when you placed your order. Again, I just put your pizzas in the oven and they’ll just be a few minutes. And I will give you a disc…
            SC: (Again, cutting me off) WELL, THAT’S JUST GREAT! JUST GREAT! I HAD THIS WHOLE EVENING PERFECTLY PLANNED AND NOW IT’S RUINED! WE RENTED A MOVIE AND WE WERE GOING TO WATCH IT WHILE WE WERE EATING THEM!! YOU HAVE RUINED OUR WHOLE EVENING! WHAT ELSE CAN GO WRONG TONIGHT?!!
            Me: (Being the ever snarky teen, and now pointing into the parking lot) Sir, your car is on fire.
            SC: (Shocked, whirls around to look in the lot, seeing that his car is indeed not on fire, turns back to me.)
            Me: (Slightly raising my voice, as I really don’t like being yelled at) SIR, I am sorry that I misheard you. I do apologize. Your pizzas will be ready in 7 minutes, if you would like them, please have a seat over there (Pointing to seats) and I will call you when they’re ready, otherwise the door is over there! (Pointing to door.)
            SC: Um… (Slinks over and sits down, probably in shock that a "mere" teenager would dare talk back to him.)

            Nice!!! If only the car on fire was true.
            I don't get paid enough to kiss your a**! -Groezig 5/31/08
            Another day...another million braincells lost...-Sarlon 6/16/08
            Chivalry is not dead. It's just direly underappreciated. -Samaliel 9/15/09

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            • #7
              Little Ceasar's are popular in my area, I think we have three stores in a 10 mile radius.

              We can get a large pepperoni with crazy bread for less than 9 bucks, it's great.

              And the customer in the OP's story must have had a serious stick up his butt. I mean geez, it's not like you had any appointments to keep or anything. Or don't we all wish our lives were so simple that the worst thing we had to complain about was a pizza order being 7 minutes late.
              The greatest thing you'll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return.

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              • #8
                Quoth badgegirl007 View Post
                I wish they were still around. There's a few of them still open but none are close enough to me

                I refuse to eat LC pizza-the ones up here closed with no notice because the owner embezzed all the money-she still owes us all 3 weeks pay-the state gave the remaining money she had to the franchise because "they needed it more" than the 70 workers that went unpaid.
                Honestly.... the image of that in my head made me go "AWESOME!"..... and then I remembered I am terribly strange.-Red dazes

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                • #9
                  Quoth badgegirl007 View Post
                  Do they still make Crazy Bread? I could make a meal out of those
                  When my brother is home from school for a weekend, him and his friends will go to Little Caesar's, buy at least 3-4 Hot'n'Ready pizzas and a few things of Crazy Bread, then hole up with it in the basement.

                  And I, inevitably, will sneak down to steal some while they're engrossed in their gaming/movie-watching.

                  As to the OP - You rock. Might not be the most tactful way to stop an SC, but you certainly gave him a much-needed reality check. 7-10 minute wait for a pizza is not the end of the world.
                  "In the end I was the mean girl/or somebody's in between girl"~Neko Case

                  “You don't need many words if you already know what you're talking about.” ~William Stafford

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                  • #10
                    Kudos to the OP! XD That was hilarious; oh to be a fly on the wall while that was going on.

                    I worked in a pizza place for a while and my hair and skin really suffered from all the grease, plus my uniform (shirt and jumper; we could wear whatever trousers we liked tho black was prefered) had to be washed all the time cuz it stank of pizza. -.-
                    People who don't like cats were probably mice in an earlier life.
                    My DeviantArt.

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                    • #11
                      Quoth Lace Neil Singer View Post
                      Kudos to the OP! XD That was hilarious; oh to be a fly on the wall while that was going on.

                      I worked in a pizza place for a while and my hair and skin really suffered from all the grease, plus my uniform (shirt and jumper; we could wear whatever trousers we liked tho black was prefered) had to be washed all the time cuz it stank of pizza. -.-
                      My husband delivered for Papa Johns for a while as a second job, I do NOT miss the smell.
                      As for Little Caesar's, I recently discovered we still have two here in town. I had though they disappeared.

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