Some of you may remember that some time ago, I ran into a guy I once knew. He and I used to get along very well, or so I thought. But when the shit really hit the fan for me, he disappeared. I unfriended him on Facebook and removed him from my Skype contacts.
So, as it turns out, we both frequent the same hangout. He walked up and said hello to me one evening, and I didn't recognize him. He had to remind me. Then, the light dawned. We chatted briefly.
Some time after that, I ran into him again. This time, he looked very pleased to see me, and struck up a conversation. This irked me. It had been a long time, he knew that I had been in a very bad situation, and suddenly, he wanted me around. I didn't like that at all; I'm not here to provide social interaction for him. Even when we spent time together all those years ago, he used to complain about things that we were tired of hearing. And when we women talked about men we found attractive, he got really pissy and made rude remarks.
So I just didn't (and don't) feel like letting him back in my life. He's been saying hello to me, sometimes going so far as to interrupt a conversation I'm having with someone else to do it. And I've been very chilly to him.
Tonight, at the hangout, I was sitting alone when two guys asked if they could sit at my table. Sure, no problem. This guy (let's call him Todd) was also in the room, and I knew he had seen me. Some time later, he sauntered over and asked if he could join us.
I thought, "Oh, great." He was sitting next to me. He knew the two guys at my table, and talked to them about various things, using a lot of colorful language. I'm no stranger to colorful language, and I'm highly fluent in it myself, but it seemed that he was just trying to draw attention to himself. He said hello to me as he sat down, and asked how I was. I said, "Fine," and picked up my book.
The guys went off somewhere else later, and sure enough, Todd came over and sat down at the table. He leaned over and said, "Eireann, if you don't want to talk to me, I understand. I'm just wondering if that's the case." (Or something like that; it was noisy in the room, and I had a little trouble hearing him.)
I looked at him and said, "You belong in my past, Todd, and I belong in yours."
He apologized - I think for what he did several years ago. And he got up and left.
It feels right. I've given too many chances to too many of the wrong people, and I've regretted it more often than not. And the way I said it was as right as I could make it. Not just that he's in my past (not present, and definitely not future), but that I am also in his.
Thoughts?
So, as it turns out, we both frequent the same hangout. He walked up and said hello to me one evening, and I didn't recognize him. He had to remind me. Then, the light dawned. We chatted briefly.
Some time after that, I ran into him again. This time, he looked very pleased to see me, and struck up a conversation. This irked me. It had been a long time, he knew that I had been in a very bad situation, and suddenly, he wanted me around. I didn't like that at all; I'm not here to provide social interaction for him. Even when we spent time together all those years ago, he used to complain about things that we were tired of hearing. And when we women talked about men we found attractive, he got really pissy and made rude remarks.
So I just didn't (and don't) feel like letting him back in my life. He's been saying hello to me, sometimes going so far as to interrupt a conversation I'm having with someone else to do it. And I've been very chilly to him.
Tonight, at the hangout, I was sitting alone when two guys asked if they could sit at my table. Sure, no problem. This guy (let's call him Todd) was also in the room, and I knew he had seen me. Some time later, he sauntered over and asked if he could join us.
I thought, "Oh, great." He was sitting next to me. He knew the two guys at my table, and talked to them about various things, using a lot of colorful language. I'm no stranger to colorful language, and I'm highly fluent in it myself, but it seemed that he was just trying to draw attention to himself. He said hello to me as he sat down, and asked how I was. I said, "Fine," and picked up my book.
The guys went off somewhere else later, and sure enough, Todd came over and sat down at the table. He leaned over and said, "Eireann, if you don't want to talk to me, I understand. I'm just wondering if that's the case." (Or something like that; it was noisy in the room, and I had a little trouble hearing him.)
I looked at him and said, "You belong in my past, Todd, and I belong in yours."
He apologized - I think for what he did several years ago. And he got up and left.
It feels right. I've given too many chances to too many of the wrong people, and I've regretted it more often than not. And the way I said it was as right as I could make it. Not just that he's in my past (not present, and definitely not future), but that I am also in his.
Thoughts?
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