Rum Guy Needs Help With Rum (kind of)....

[Jester]

Actually, I need your powers of google fu for a project I'm doing for my bar.

To wit, I need rum quotes. Quotes by famous people about rum. Preferably good quotes, but quotes nonetheless. In my attempts to find such, I have been surprisingly ineffective.

Currently I have 3 good ones, but I would like some more.

Any help y'all can provide will be most appreciated!

Thank you.

--Jester

[chikenlady]

“The only way that I could figure they could improve upon Coca-Cola, one of life's most delightful elixirs, which studies prove will heal the sick and occasionally raise the dead, is to put rum or bourbon in it.” Lewis Grizzard 1946-1994

[ApolloSZ]

There's naught, no doubt, so much the spirit calms as rum and true religion.
Lord Byron

RUM, n. Generically, fiery liquors that produce madness in total abstainers.
Ambrose Bierce

Where I go, I hope there's rum
Jimmy Buffett

Oddly enough, google's 'suggestions' when typing in the desired search, when you get to "quotes about ru", "Quotes about Rum" comes up. lol.

[Seshat]

http://thinkexist.com/quotes/with/keyword/rum/

Among the expected glories of the Constitution, next to the abolition of Slavery was that of Rum.
George Clymer


The party whose antecedents are rum, Romanism, and rebellion.

-Burchard, Samuel Dickinson
Of the Democratic party. Speech at the Fifth Avenue Hotel, NewYork City, 29 Oct.

Fifteen men on a dead man's chestö Yo-ho-ho, and a bottle of rum! Drink and the devil had done for the restö Yo-ho-ho, and a bottle of rum!

-Stevenson, Robert Louis
Treasure Island, ch.1,'The Old Sea-Dog at the'Admiral Benbow'.'

'I expect,' he said,'I was thinking jest what a Rum Go everything is.'

-Wells, H(erbert) G(eorge)
Kipps, bk.3, ch.3.

I am born of the conquerors, you of the persecuted. Raped by rum and an alien law, progress and economics, are you and I and a once-loved land peopled by tribes and trees; doomed traders and stock-exchanges, bought by faceless strangers.

-McKinney
A Human Pattern,'Two Dreamtimes', stanzas17^18.The poem is dedicated to KathWalker (now Oodgeroo Noonuccal).


“Rum, sodomy and the lash.” Known as the three abiding traditions of the British Navy, this quote is attributed (falsely) to famous tippler Winston Churchill. Again, just how did the British get and keep that globe-spanning empire?

“Let us candidly admit that there are shameful blemishes on the American past, of which the worst by far is rum. Nevertheless, we have improved man's lot and enriched his civilization with rye, bourbon and the Martini cocktail. In all history has any other nation done so much?”

Bernard De Voto (1897-1955)
American writer and critic.



“WINE, n. Fermented grape-juice known to the Women's Christian Union as 'liquor,' sometimes as 'rum.' Wine, madam, is God's next best gift to man.”

Ambrose Bierce (1842-1914)
'The Devil's Dictionary' (1911)



“Rum and Coca-Cola is, by any measure, a drink of inspired blandness, with its two main ingredients both plentiful and cheap. It requires few if any skills to prepare.”

Wayne Curtis, ‘Rum and Coca-Cola’
‘The American Scholar’ (Summer 2006)



And, of course, plenty of quotes from Pirates of the Caribbean:


Elizabeth: So that's it, then? That's the secret, grand adventure of the infamous Jack Sparrow. You spent three days lying on a beach drinking rum.
Jack Sparrow: Welcome to the Caribbean, love.

Elizabeth: I'm not entirely sure that I've had enough rum to allow that kind of talk.


Jack Sparrow: [Wakes up and sees Elizabeth burning the rum] No! Not good! Stop! Not good! What are you doing? You burned all the food, the shade... the rum!
Elizabeth: Yes, the rum is gone.
Jack Sparrow: Why is the rum gone?
Elizabeth: One: because it is a *vile* drink that turns even the most respectable men into complete scoundrels. Two: that signal is over a thousand feet high. The entire royal navy is out looking for me, do you think there is even the slightest chance they wont see it?
Jack Sparrow: But why is the rum gone?
Elizabeth: mark my words, give it an hour maybe two, keep a weather eye out and there will be white sails on that horizon.

[Greenday]

Damn, I was hoping to be the first to quote Jack Sparrow's "But why is the rum gone!?"

[Jester]

I appreciate everything so far, and keep them coming, but I do need to add one clarification: these need to be positive (or at least amusing) quotes about rum. Definitely not negative ones, such as the Wayne Curtis and Bernard de Voto quotes above. (Sorry, Seshat, but I DO appreciate all the effort you expended to come up with those and the other quotes.) Basically quotes extolling rum, not damning it.

Keep 'em coming!

[telecom_goddess]

Hopefully movie quotes will work for you...

Convoy (1978)
Here's the plan: When we get to the pass, we're gonna put on our fish costumes, pass out the Vaseline® an' an extra ration o' rum for the men. That should do it.

A Bit of Fry and Laurie (1987 TV Series)
We're going to leave you with tonight's cocktail recipe. This one's called "A Slow Snog With A Distant Relative". For this you'll need two measures of brandy, three of rum. One measure pink gin, one white. A dash of lemonade, a sprint of orange-juice, a spoonful of crushed Sugar Puffs, two hard-boiled eggs and an open-toed sandal, size nine if you can get it. Hit it, Mr Laurie, if you'd be so very kind. ( I have no idea what this show was but it's a great quote).

I did a search on imdb.com based on quotes and rum...

[wagegoth]

Rum’s not drinking, it’s surviving! - Robert Shaw as “Romer Treece” in the movie “The Deep"

[wagegoth]

Chi Chi Rodriguez: "The first time I played the Masters, I was so nervous I drank a bottle of rum before I teed off. I shot the happiest 83 of my life."

[draggar]

Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum?

I'm sure Captian Jack Sparrow has several.

Chi Chi Rodriguez:
“The first time I played the Masters, I was so nervous I drank a bottle of rum before I teed off. I shot the happiest 83 of my life.”


Benjamin Franklin:
“If it be the design of Providence to extirpate these savages in order to make room for the cultivation of the earth, it seems not improbable that rum may be the appointed means.”


Lord Byron:
“There's naught, no doubt, so much the spirit calms as rum and true religion”

[CaroPhoenix]

"I drink a rum in the morning/I drink a rum at night/I drink a rum in the afternoon/It makes me feel alright/I drink a rum in times of peace/And two in times of war/I drink a rum before I drink a rum/And then I drink some more!"
--- "I Drink a Rum" by The Pyrates Royale

Rum rum rum rum rum rum
Sex on the beach!
--- Me, paraphrased from a different Pyrates Royale song (but then again, I'm not famous, so you might not want to use that one )

And then there's the saying on the t-shirt I was wearing yesterday:

"Time flies when you are having rum!"

[Jester]

Rum’s not drinking, it’s surviving! - Robert Shaw as “Romer Treece” in the movie “The Deep"

Chi Chi Rodriguez: "The first time I played the Masters, I was so nervous I drank a bottle of rum before I teed off. I shot the happiest 83 of my life."

These are great!

And then there's the saying on the t-shirt I was wearing yesterday:

"Time flies when you are having rum!"

Amusingly, we already have that saying on some of our t-shirts.