(Dumb) Manners question

[HotelMinion]

So this has been pinballing in my head for a while. It may be a stupid question, but I'm gonna ask anyway. =p Is it rude to interrupt someone when she or he is talking? Most everyone (except for one) I know says it's not, it's a sign of weakness, and weakness is *bad*. Like who has the biggest mouth in this conversation 'battle'.
Or does it depend. Like when someone is interrupting you, so you do it back. But isn't that *stooping to their (rude) level* . I've seen it on TV someone interrupts someone and the laugh track laughs. Sooo...is it seen as funny, not rude? Just interested in getting some opinions. ^_^

[Seanette]

IMO, normally rude. Exception for something REALLY urgent, such as interrupting your boss chatting with someone to alert him/her to an emergency in progress.

[csquared]

According to most of the advice columnist/exprts, such as Miss Manner, Emily Post, Ann Landers & Dear Abby, interrupting someone while they are speaking is "bad manners".

Unfortunately, sometimes you have to use bad manners when dealing with bad manners.

[MoonCat]

Depends on the situation. If someone is keeping you from getting your work done, or dealing with something that must be addressed immediately, you can say "Excuse me" and stop the conversation.

If you don't understand what they're talking about, again, an "excuse me" with a request to explain isn't rude. If you're just bored, though, or they're talking to someone else and you just want to make a comment, it's rude to just butt in while the other person is speaking. You may have to wait for a lull in the conversation. YMMV if you and your friends and/or family are okay with people all talking at once or whatever.

Look at it this way. How would you feel if someone did it to you? If you would not like it, then it's best not to do it to someone else.

[Javarod]

Generally considered rude, but it can be complicated, depending on the person's culture, proper interaction can vary greatly from one country to another, and even within it. I'd go with your instinct, if it feels rude to you, then don't do it unless absolutely necessary.

[Greenday]

I know certain groups of friends who talking over each other is the norm and basically it's whoever is loudest wins.

But I consider it extremely rude and if I can't get a word in with my normal talking voice, I get pissed quickly.

[MoonCat]

There's one type of interruption that I find especially rude. It's when I'm talking to someone I rarely get to see, at some type of gathering, and somebody comes up and is all, "HI JOE WHAT'S HAPPENING HOW ARE YOU HEY DID YOU HEAR ABOUT BLAH BLAH BLAH..." - Talking to the other person, not to me.

It makes me feel invisible, like I'm not even a person, and they feel free to just butt in and take over the conversation. It's especially upsetting when the person I was speaking to just goes along with it and apparently forgets they were even talking to me.

[Seshat]

I believe that it's rude, as a general rule.

However, like all general rules, there are exceptions. Emergencies are the most obvious exception. (Excuse me, there's a fire in the building/Joe has arterial bleeding and you're in front of the nearest first aid kit/etc etc)

Another exception is if you've indicated - politely - that you need to speak to one of the parties in the conversation and they've been ignoring you. I normally indicate a need to speak by moving close to the people involved, and/or making eye contact, and/or making a hand gesture and checking that they've seen it.
I allow a reasonable amount of time for them to complete current thoughts, then turn to me to find out what I need. 'Reasonable' varies by circumstance: in a fast-paced work environment, it might be 'finish the current sentence because Seshat probably has a customer waiting'. At a party, it might be 'finish the current set of thoughts, then invite Seshat to join the conversation'.

There are, of course, other exceptions. But that's my rough guide to the courtesy of the situation.