They keep on coming, they keep on coming, they keep on coming into my lane...

[Princess-Snake]

... and they annoy me, and they confuse me, it's a wonder that I'm still sane.

Pop
You know how some people have these annoying habits they display in public?
Like Bubble Girl. Bubble Girl liked to chew gum. No, not chew. Pop.
So she comes in my line, has some bread that needs a price check, and the manager goes to check it. And here's Bubble Gir, leaning on her cart, humming a tune, and chewing. No, not chewing. Popping! And I think to myself, "If she pops that gum one more time." And she did. So when she left, I turned around towards the wall and let out a frustrated growl. Then forced the wall painfully onto my head.

They keep on coming, they keep on coming, they keep on coming into my lane
And they annoy me, and they confuse me, it's a wonder that I'm still sane.

Six
A guy came in here about two days ago, he said he bought a jug of milk that was leaking before he got home, and he wanted a refund. I gave it to him, and he went his merry way. I told the manager what happened. He took the milk, examined it, then went to check on something on the computers. Then he told me something that made me angry! Bought it, he told me. Bought it my ass. Not only did he do this before. Oh no. He did it six times. And we're trying to get him banned. Then my manager smiled. He called the police and they went to this guy's house. You know, scammers should learn to hide their license plates from store cameras.

They keep on coming, they keep on coming, they pick a cashier in her prime
And they abuse her, and they argue with her, over one lousy dime!

Squish
A woman comes in with her sneakers all wet. They make a squish sound as she walks. Then she storms up into my lane. "Your charging too much for beef!" She was drunk and crazy. And she kept on screaming, "Your charging too much for beef!" Then she went to the meat aisle and shouted this to passing customers. She shouted this ten times before the police were called and forcibly removed her from the store.

And they annoy me, and they confuse me, it's a wonder that I'm still sane.

Uh-uh
A woman is paying for groceries with her credit card. Declined. Try again. Declined. I tell her it's declined. She shakes her head and goes, "Uh-uh." Try debit. Declined. Again. Declined. "Uh-uh." She gives me a check. Declined. One more time. Declined. "Uh-uh." I ask if she has cash. She goes, "Uh-uh." Then says, "Do you think this is why the bank wanted me to call them this morning?"

They keep on coming, they keep on coming...

Cicero
A teenager was talking on her cell phone while I'm reshelving mayo, and it sounds like she's upset with her sister. For the next five minutes, I hear wail, scream, shout, cry, tears, damn you, f*ck you, whine, shriek, one right after the other. So it's finally obvious that her sister was sleeping with her boyfriend and the three of them are now in a vicious love triangle. I go away for a minute, come back with more mayo, and there's this girl with the phone hung up, making out with another boy whom she called, "Tyler." Her boyfriend's name is "Sean." Well, I was disgusted. I completely shut my eyes, and tried to erase this memory. It wasn't until later, when I opened my eyes, did I realize that this would be stuck in my head forever.

They keep on coming, they keep on coming, they keep on coming all day long.
I wish they wouldn't, but if they didn't, then I wouldn't be writing this song.
They keep on coming (they keep on coming), they keep on coming (they keep on coming), they keep on coming all day long (they pick a cashier in her prime),
I wish they wouldn't (and they abuse her), but if they didn't (and they argue with her), then I wouldn't be writing this song. (over one lousy dime!)

Lipschitz
We sell paint by numbers kits in our greeting card aisle. A man came up with his young daughter to purchase one. But he didn't agree with the price. He tried to lower the price by switching the price stickers, arguing with me, trying to reason with me, and threating to buy it elsewhere. He eventually bought it here. He must have saw himself as smart, but I saw him as stupid

When will it end, end, end, end? When will it end, end end, end?
They keep on coming, they keep on coming, they keep on coming all day long.
I wish they wouldn't, but if they didn't, then I wouldn't be writing this song!
They keep on coming, they keep on coming, they keep on coming into my lane.
And they annoy me, and they confuse me, it's a wonder that I'm still sane!

If she pops that gum one more time
Bought it my ass
Ten times before the police were called
Do you think this is why the bank wanted me to call them this morning?
Her boyfriend's name is "Sean."
He eventually bought it here.

Pop, Six, Squish, Uh-uh, Cicero, Lipschitz

[ladyklack]

I think I'm a little bit in love with you now.

[Broomjockey]

*claps* Awesome

[NotSoInnocent]

Wow. You.... you just so totally rock out loud. Awesome, indeed!

[hawkchick11]

I love it! Chicago is my favorite musical

[disneyfav4ever]

I love it! And the Cell Block Tango is my favorite song in Chicago.

[mattm04]

I love the people who think that if they run their CC just one more time it will work. I can see running it twice(ie wrong pin entered, pushed credit insead of debit, etc), but then look for another payment form.

[Tigress]

That is so freaking awesome.

[KnitShoni]

Brilliant. That was great.

[Pagan]

<stands up to applaud> Brava, Princess, brava!

[JustaCashier]

Yes, very good correlation with the Musical! (I'm not into them, so was not familiar with Chicago, and Googled the lyrics to Cell Block Tango).

Now, my thoughts on some of the individual SC's.......

Pop

Yes, that greatly annoys me too, as do the customers that speak to me with a mouthful of the candy bar, or other snack that they opened immediately after, or quite often before I have scanned it. (Extra points if it's a chewy caramel treat that makes them harder to understand/more annoying to listen to. More extra points if they tore the UPC upon opening.)

What actually annoys me more though, being at a hardware store, are the aerosol paint can shakers, tinktinktinktinktinktinktink...........tinktinktinktinktinktinktink......

Sorry if you're bored, or annoyed at waiting in line, but we cashiers are doing our best to move the line along, and I, for one, find that sound to be distracting, and irritating. So, unless you're going to go out to the parking lot and spray your rims, or some other part of you car, you don't need to shake the farkin' can while standing in line in the store!!

Squish

I had this picture in my mind of Clara Peller, the Wendy's "Where's the BEEF?!?" lady from the '80's TV commercials.

Uh-uh

"....But I don't understaaaannnnd! I just put $364,582.97 into my acoooouuuuunnnnt!!

Cicero

How much you wanna bet she had just found "Tyler" down the aisle while you had stepped away?

Lipschitz

How very wrong to begin with, but to do it in front of your little girl?!?

Too bad she didn't speak up and (loudly) say "But Daddy, isn't it wrong to change price tags?...."

Mike

[crazylegs]

Thats all thats nessecary me thinks

[Princess-Snake]

Lipschitz

How very wrong to begin with, but to do it in front of your little girl?!?

Too bad she didn't speak up and (loudly) say "But Daddy, isn't it wrong to change price tags?...."

Mike

Sad thing is the little girl didn't even bat an eye while all of this was happening. She acted like this was the most natural thing in the world. Which makes me realize Daddy has taught her it's okay to lie to store clerks because their stupid. And thanks everyone! I'm glad you all liked it!

[Sliceanddice]

princess thanks now i get to have the mentle image of a grocery girl dancing round the shop, from till to till, aisle to aisle, in high heels (like someone in retail would really wear those) a jazz dress and a bob.

[LizaMarie]

classy ^_^